Where Is Your Heart?
by Emz80m
Summary: Can a one-night stand really have the potential to alter the course of your entire life? Edward Cullen is the not so popular 'cute' guy who has always had a thing for Bella. I have this story written and am adpting it to Twilight
1. Chapter 1

_Edward POV_

I don't know why I expected Forks to look any different since I knew it hadn't changed that much in the 18 years I lived here, why did I expect it to change in the three I had been gone?

I saw the Diner as I drove through town and I smiled. One thing I was glad hadn't changed was the Diner. The whole way through high school it had been where everyone from school would come to hang out. It was where I would hang out every day as I stared at my favourite waitress. That thankfully had changed.

I left three years ago after graduation to attend college in New York. It was a new experience and one that couldn't come soon enough for me. Forks did not hold a lot of happy memories for me, and I had always looked forward to leaving. This was the first time I had come home to Forks since I had left. School was always busier than expected, and there were always other things to do during breaks that beat coming home to a small town like Forks. A town where people loved to gossip about everyone and everything around them. I didn't need that.

I pulled up at the Diner and walked towards the doors slowly, unable to deny my craving for a Diner burger and fries any longer. Unlike every other time I had approached the glass doors I didn't feel the butterflies in my stomach as I wondered whether I would see her today, or if I would be lucky enough to get a booth in her section because I knew she wouldn't be here.

Everyone has one of those people. You know what I'm talking about. A girl who would give you a reason to get up every morning just so you could see her, or for some of you a guy that made your heart slam in your chest every time he walked past. Bella Swan was that girl for me.

Bella had been a waitress at the diner and had worked most afternoons and weekends. We also went to school together. I won't lie and tell you that we were friends; frankly I always thought she never knew I existed but that never mattered to me.

I heard the familiar bells ring above the door as I entered. It was still the middle of the day and there weren't too many other people there so I took a seat in the nearest booth to the door and picked up the menu. I smiled when I realised it also hadn't changed.

"Hi, I'm Bella and I'll be your waitress today. Can I start by getting you a drink?" I stopped the minute I heard her voice. It was impossible I told myself, I was imagining it because why the hell would Bella Swan still be here? It had been her dream to get out of Forks. I raised my eyes slowly and when I finally met hers I could see the shock in her own, and before I knew what was happening she gasped.

"Hi Bella," I said finally after pulling myself together. It had been almost three years to the day since I had last seen her.

"Edward," she nodded. "What are you doing here?" she asked me.

That was typical of Bella, always getting straight to the point. "I'm home for the holidays," I answered

"So what can I get you?" she asked.

"Um I'll have two cherry cokes, a burger, fries, and do you still have that salad thing?" I asked picking the menu back up.

"Yeah," she answered.

"Cool its Tanya's favourite so I'll grab one of those too," I said.

I watched her stiffen at the mention of Tanya's name and was a little surprised. It was obvious that she was uncomfortable with exchanging pleasantries with me, I couldn't blame her it was kind of awkward after three years.

She walked off to get the drinks and brought them to me right away in take away cups "So are you home for the holidays too?" I asked her curious about why she was waitressing in the Diner.

Bella opened her mouth to answer me but stopped abruptly when the bells above the front door chimed. "Mummy," the little boy yelled out pushing away from the man he was with and rushing over to Bella.

Bella's face immediately paled and she stepped back from the booth and bent down to pick the little boy up.

"I'm sorry sweetie," the man laughed and I finally realised that it was Charlie Swan. "I thought you'd be finished your shift by now"

"Hi," Bella said, "did you have fun at the park?" she asked the little boy.

I couldn't take my eyes off them. I know I'm staring; in fact I'm positive my mouth has probably fallen open.

"Yep, poppy got me ice cream," he grinned.

I watched as Bella's face lit up unlike I had ever seen before as she stared at the little boy.

"Order up," the cook calls out then indicating my order is ready and I watch as Bella realises that I am still sitting here.

"Um, I'll just get that for you Edward," she says.

She returned with my order quickly in a to-go bag.

"Is he yours?" I whisper as I look at the little boy. There is something about him and I can't shake the feeling that is building in my gut. Bella obviously senses this too.

"Yeah," she says as she looks down at the little boy who is drifting off against her shoulder.

"Um how old is he?" I ask her.

Bella meets my eyes. "He was two in March," she says.

I don't need to do the math to know what that means. I look at the small boy whose hair is a shade darker than his mothers, but it's his startling green eyes that have me captivated.

"Sally will ring that up for you" she tells me.

"Ok, thanks Bella" I reply

I pay my bill and turn back to Bella contemplating just coming out and asking her, but when I look around all I see is the back of her head as she disappears behind the break room door.

With a shake of my head I step towards the door to leave only to find Charlie Swan still standing and studying me.

"You went to school with Bella right?" Charlie Swan asks me.

"Um yes Sir," I answer.

"You're Carlisle and Esmes son right?"

"Yeah Edward," I tell him.

"Welcome back to Forks, Edward," he smiles.

I nod at him and smile as best I can considering how I feel right now, and with one last look at the door Bella disappeared behind with her son, I walk out of the Diner.

It doesn't take me long before I'm climbing out of my jeep and carrying the takeout food into Tanya's parents place.

"What took you so long?" she asks as I sit down beside her.

"Um they were busy," I lie. My thoughts are still occupied by Bella and her son.

"Oh," she smiles. "Wow I can't believe they still have this," she laughs. "I used to eat this everyday when you would drag me to that place," she says still completely oblivious after all these years to the real reason I wanted to go there every day, and for that small favour I'm eternally grateful.

"You ok?" I look over at her and notice that she's staring at me with concern. I can hardly blame her since I've hardly spoken since I sat down.

I put on a fake smile for her benefit. "Fine," I tell her.

"So when are we going to tell everyone?" she asks me then and I remember the reason we are actually home.

"Well we could all go to dinner tomorrow night!" I suggest with a smile.

I met Tanya in my senior year of high school. I was mostly a loner except for my best friend Jasper. Tanya was quiet and smart and we got paired together on an assignment. Soon after I asked her out and we've been happy together ever since, which is why I finally popped the question a week ago. Now we're home in Forks to tell our families our happy news.

I finish my burger then, practically shoving in my mouth as I think about what I need to do.

"Um I gotta go," I tell her.

She frowns at me. "What? Where are you going?" she asks.

"There is someone I want to see," I inform her.

I can tell she's confused. I don't blame her. Apart from her and my sister I don't keep in touch with anyone in Forks but I know Jasper still lives here, and I would bet my last dollar that he still lives in the same apartment too.

I kiss her soundly on the lips and smile. "I'll see you later babe," I tell her. I'm lucky that I have Tanya, not only is she beautiful but she's solid, loyal and she loves me. I really am a lucky guy.

"Bye," she says.

I only knock on the door a couple of times before its pulled open. Alice Brandon stands on the other side and is looking at me confused.

"Hi Alice," I say "Is Jasper here?" I ask her.

"Wow look what the cat dragged in," she says and it's clear by the look on her face what she thinks of me. I can hardly blame her either.

"Jasper you've got a visitor I'll be home later," she yells before pushing past me and walking off.

"Edward?" Jasper says confused when he comes to the door.

"Hey man," I smile. Despite the fact I haven't talked to my once best friend in nearly a year it's great to see him.

"What are you doing here?" he asks.

"Um back for the holidays and wanted to come by and say hi," I tell him and follow him inside.

He seems to be waiting for me to say something else like he doesn't quite believe my story. "So you're still with Alice?" I smile. I'm happy for him.

"Yep," he nods.

We grow silent for a while then and it's obvious he has no intention of adding to the conversation. "Why didn't you say something Jazz?" I ask him then.

He raises an eyebrow at me, "about what?"

"Bella Swan having a son," I snap.

"Oh," he smiles. "Back in Forks and already stalking your old haunts," he chuckles.

"Hardly, I dropped in to get some food for Tanya and I, and imagine my surprise to find Bella working, and then her son appears" I say angrily. "A son who looks an awful lot like me Jazz and considering his birthday, could be my son,"

He looks at me then. "It wasn't my place," he shrugs.

"Of course it was, you're my fucking best friend," I yell.

"Some best friend. I haven't heard from you in a year," he scoffs.

"I'm sorry that I stopped calling," I sigh. "There was just less and less to say but God Jasper is he mine?" I finally ask.

Jasper sighs. "Alice would kill me if she found out I was even talking to you about her nephew," he tells me. "The truth is I don't know. Like you said he does look like you so I guess it's possible."

"She doesn't know?" I ask shocked.

"Not for sure. At first he had sandy blonde hair and blue eyes like most newborns and everyone was convinced he was Mike's. Mike got tested and he wasn't a match. No one even suspected you until a year ago when his looks started changing"

I sighed, "Who else was there?"

Jasper shrugged. "No idea man, guess you'll just have to get tested and find out," he said.

I shook my head. "No. No," I tell him before standing up. There is no way I'm going to let a mistake I made three years ago ruin my life.

"I've gotta go man but I'll catch up with you soon ok," I said.


	2. Chapter 2

_Three Years Ago_

I knew I shouldn't be here as I looked around the party but I couldn't stop myself. Tonight is my last night in Forks and instead of being at home and getting an early night like I had told my girlfriend, I'm attending a party that I overheard my fantasy girl tell her best friend she would be attending.

I spy my best friend standing against the back wall trying to blend in and make my way over to him.

"Hey," he says evidently shocked to see me here.

"Hey," I reply.

"Hi Jazzy," Alice Brandon purrs as she approaches Jasper. Alice is Bella's best friend so as soon as I see her I begin looking around for Bella. It doesn't take long to find her. She's leaning against the bar in the shortest dress I've ever seen but looking sexy as hell at the same time while flirting with Mike Newton.

I turn to tell Jasper that I'm going for a walk and instead find him and Alice going at it in front of me. Alice has had a thing for Jasper for a long time but he decided to play hard to get. Something Alice was happy to play.

I walk towards the bar where Bella is trying to play it cool by pretending to be getting a drink. I don't drink often so I just grab a beer.

"Hi Edward," I turn and smile when I see Bella smiling at me. Bella and I have never been friends, sure she talks to me when she takes my order at the Diner or even when she walks past me at school, but we've never really had a conversation of any substance.

"Hey Bella," I smile back. Act cool Edward, I tell myself.

She looks around then obviously looking for someone or something. "Where's your girlfriend?" she finally asks. I'm shocked she even knows I have a girlfriend and I'm not sure what to tell her.

"She didn't come," I explain.

"Oh," she grins. "I'm glad you decided to come," she tells me.

"You are?" I say shocked.

"Yeah," she tells me. "I wish we could have gotten to know each other more over the years," she says then. I smile realising she's just giving me one of those speeches that girls give guys who have panted pathetically after them for years.

"Me too," I tell her.

"Well maybe we could tonight," she says then surprising the hell out of me. She has taken a step forward now and is pressing herself against me.

"Um well," I stammer not sure how to answer. This is Bella Swan one of the most popular girls at school, the girl I had my first wet dream about, the women I imagine when I get myself off.

I look down and watch as her tongue glides out of her mouth and licks her lips then and it's the most erotic thing I've ever seen. "Sure," I answer.

I let her take my hand then and she leads us through the house until we walk into a quiet part of the house and a bedroom.

"You know," she starts as she leans against the closed bedroom door whilst I sit on the bed nervously, "I'm going to miss serving you at the Diner"

"Really?"

"Yeah I loved how you would come in everyday and sit in my section," she smirks. Shit, she did notice that after all.

I watch as she approaches me then. "But I especially love how you used to check me out even when your girlfriend sat next to you," she whispers.

I gulp at her closeness now; she's standing in between my open legs her hands on my shoulders.

"I thought that maybe you liked me or something but you never asked me out and then you started dating Teena," she says.

"Tanya," I correct her for some stupid reason.

"Tanya, yeah that's her name. She's really beautiful Edward," she tells me.

"So are you," I find myself saying.

"You think so?" she says.

I nod.

"So does that mean…?" she asks.

I chuckle nervously then. "Yeah I liked you. I just didn't think I stood a chance in hell," I tell her.

Bella smiles at that. "You did, you do," she informs me, "but you just said liked so does that mean…?"

"I like," I tell her.

She surprises me then by crawling onto my lap and I'm hopeless but to wrap my arms around her small waist. Her lips travel to my ear. "Did you fantasise about me?" she asks.

I pull her more firmly against me so she wouldn't fall and unconsciously push her closer to my hard cock.

"I'll take that as a yes," she purrs grinding against me.

I don't know who it is or what it is that takes over me then, well that's a lie of course I do. It's the hormones of a guy who's never had sex and whose fantasy girl is practically begging for him to fuck her.

I thrust my hips upwards to give her a better feel of me. "Oh yes," she moans right before her lips seek out mine. For a guy whose never had sex before I seem to do something right because soon I have Bella naked and lying underneath me as I suck on her breasts. Her nipples are big and rosy and I suck then into my mouth until they're hard as bullets.

"Yes Edward," she moans.

I snake a hand down between our bodies and seek out her wetness then. She's slick as I trace her lower lips and I can't resist thrusting a finger inside of her. Despite what I expected based on her reputation she's tight around my finger and I almost come as I think about how good that tightness would feel around my angry, hard cock.

I don't have to think about it for long. Soon I find myself on my back and Bella is tugging my jeans and boxers down my legs.

"Have you ever had a blow job Edward?" she asks me with a grin.

I shake my head.

Bella's grin grows bigger as she settles between my legs and begins to take my cock into her mouth. "Oh fuck Bella," I cry out.

Her mouth is so hot and tight and sucks me like a Hoover, not that I would know what a hoover would feel like but you get what I mean.

Her small hand cups my balls and squeezes them as she bobs up and down on my cock.

"Oh fuck Bella I'm coming," I try to warn her but despite my words she stays where she is and when I blow she takes it all into her mouth and swallows it.

"Fuck," I hiss.

Bella wipes her mouth before crawling up my body and straddling me. "I hope you have a quick recovery time stud," she smirks.

I hope I do too.

"I'm really horny for you Edward," she whispers in my ear as she sucks on my lobe.

I'm realising a fantasy right now and it's better than in any dream. My cock is hard again and I know I'm about to lose my virginity to the temptress on top of me. Tanya's face flashes in my mind then and for a minute I feel guilty but it doesn't last long before Bella is sinking down on my cock.

"Oh yes," she cries out. "You're a stallion," she purrs as she tries to get used to my length and girth.

"Oh fuck me Bella," I moan this feels unbelievable.

"I plan on it," she tells me as she rises up and then sinks back down on top of me.

She bucks and grinds against me hard and I know I'm not going to be able to last long. Turns out that isn't not a problem for Bella who I make come before I lose my load.

"Yes….ahh yes EDWARD," she cries out and I thank god for the blaring music that's playing in the main room of the party because Bella sure has a set of lungs on her.

"Ahh…yes ahh BELLA," I cry out as I follow her over the edge.

We went at it for hours after that and I was pretty proud of my performance and the fact that I made her come a lot.

In the end we collapsed against the bed exhausted.

I wasn't surprised when I woke up the next morning to find her gone. I won't lie and say it didn't hurt but what do you expect when you fuck someone like Bella Swan? I tell myself.

I find a note on top of my clothes, which I am surprised, have been neatly folded and placed on the edge of the bed for me.

_[I]Thanks for a hot night; you were sweet and completely hot. _

_See you around Forks sometime stallion. [/I] _

She kissed the note with her painted lips and I couldn't help but smile a little and wondered how many guys got a note like this.

I didn't have long to dwell on that thought though because my cell started going off in my jeans pocket.

"Hello," I answer.

"Edward where are you?" Rosalie asks worried.

I sigh and look at the clock. Shit. I'm supposed to leave for the airport in an hour. "Shit Rose you've got to cover for me. I'll be home in ten minutes," I tell her.

"Ok," she agreed, "but Edward you better hurry Mum and Dad will be up soon," she tells me.

It's not just my Mum and Dad I have to worry about though because I know Tanya is due to arrive at my house any minute. Today was the day we were supposed to start our new life together at college, and instead I'm lying in bed after just having sex with someone that isn't my girlfriend, and for the first time since my fantasies were realised last night I feel like a first class asshole. I just lost my virginity to Bella Swan.


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3**

After I leave Jasper's I decide to go home. My mum is in the kitchen and smiles and kisses me as I walk through the door.

"Is Dad home?" I ask her.

"Yeah he's in his study," she tells me. "Are you ok sweetie?"

"Um yeah," I nod. "I just need to talk to Dad about something," I tell her.

I find my Dad working on something in his office and I knock before entering something that I have been taught to do.

"Dad can I talk to you about something?" I ask him. When I was growing up I was the never the kind of son that went to his father if something was wrong. Usually I never needed to but I realised on my way home from Jasper's that I really needed my father's help on this one.

"Sure sit down," he encourages.

"What's going on son?" he asks.

"I think I've really fucked up Dad," I say and the way it comes out of my mouth makes me sound completely helpless. All of a sudden I felt like a 16-year-old kid instead of the 22 year old man that I am.

He looks at me concerned. "What happened?"

I hang my head in shame. "Do you know the Swan's daughter, they own the Diner?" I ask.

"Sure Bella used to be friends with Rosalie," he says. Yeah right I completely forgot about that.

"Did you know that she had a son?" I ask.

He nods. "I had heard that yes. What's this about Edward?"

"I-I think he's my son," I blurt out.

My father looks at me confused then. "Why would you think that?"

I can't meet his eyes. "He looks like me," I whisper.

I hear my father sigh then and I finally look up and meet his eyes. "You slept with her I assume?"

I lower my head again and nod.

"When?" he asks.

"The night before I left for New York," I tell him.

"How old is the little boy?"

"He was two in March," I gulp.

I watch my Dad shake his head then. "Did you use anything?" he finally asks me and I again have to shamefully shake my head. I hadn't thought about that at the time and I guess I just stupidly assumed that Bella was using something.

"If he was your son why wouldn't Bella have told you?" he asks me then.

I think about his question and I wonder the same thing. It's not like there wasn't ways for Bella to get in contact with me if she had really wanted to.

"I think that there were a few potential fathers," I tell him not at all happy that I have to admit to my father that I slept with the town slut. I know I've adopted a bitter way of thinking but once I was away from Forks and not under Bella's spell anymore I was finally able to realise exactly the type of person she was. She was the type of girl who would fuck a guy she knew she was never going to see again even though she knew he had a girlfriend.

I could see the disappointment in my father's face. "Well I think it would be best for you to speak to her. You can get a paternity test and deal with it after that," he says.

"What!" I object. "Dad I don't want to have to deal with this I just want it to go away," I tell him.

"Edward," he says sternly, "this could possibly be your son," he reminds me.

"I know that alright!" I yell, "But do you know what will happen if everyone finds out that he's mine?" I ask. He doesn't seem to understand so I decide to tell him. "I'll lose Tanya dad, don't you get it? We were together and I cheated on her with Bella. If she finds out she'll leave me and I'm not willing to let that happen." I say.

"Edward if Tanya really loves you she'll forgive you eventually. You can't just ignore this son," he says.

"Why not?" I ask. "She doesn't seem to care otherwise she would have told me or asked me to be tested sooner," I tell him.

"I didn't come home for this Dad," I say then as I stand up and begin pacing. "Tanya and I are announcing our engagement tomorrow night at dinner," I inform him then. "I'm about to start my life with the women I love and I won't let a one night stand that I had over three years ago ruin that," I declare.

"So what do you want to do just pretend he doesn't exist?" he asks and I can tell he's disappointed maybe even ashamed of me.

"I just want it to go away Dad," I tell him.

"Leave it with me," he finally whispers after what feels like hours of silence but is really only a couple of minutes.

"Thank you," I whisper.

He doesn't respond though he just picks back up the notes he was reading before I interrupted him and I take that as my cue to leave.

_[I]Bella POV [/I]_

Alice has just left and I'm busy cleaning Ethan's toys up from where he was playing in the living room when there is a knock at the door. I wasn't expecting anyone so I peered through the peephole before opening the door.

"Mr Cullen?" I ask confused when I open the door. Carlisle Cullen and my father are old friends. Apart from also being Edward and Rosalie's father he is the chief doctor at the hospital and I have been to see him over the years more times than I care to remember.

"Hello Bella," he smiles at me.

"Hi," I reply. "Um did you need to see my father?" I ask.

"Actually I was hoping to talk to you," he says to my surprise.

"Um ok come in," I say taking a step back. I realise my arms are full of toys then and I place them along with a few other stray toys back into the toy box before sitting down across from him.

"What can I do for you?" I ask him. Its making me nervous thinking about why he is here.

"I actually wanted to speak to you about your son," he tells me and I instantly freeze.

"What about him?" I ask.

"My son seems to think that he could potentially be the father, Bella is that true?" he asks me. His tone is not accusing but it is questioning.

"If Edward wants to know, why didn't he come and ask me himself?" I ask irritated.

It's one thing for his son to come into my place of work and make me feel like a loser for still working there, but then he has the hide to flaunt his girlfriend in my face. Didn't seem to care so much about her the night he was fucking my brains out and conceiving our son, I think to myself.

"We both know the answer to that otherwise I wouldn't be here," he sighs.

"It's possible," I tell him.

"How possible?" he asks.

"Very possible," I relent. "Mike Newton was already tested, I thought the baby was his but it wasn't," I inform him.

He nods at me then. "I would like to set up a test if you don't have any objections," he says.

I nod; not at all I just wasn't going to be the one to ask.

"Are you here as Edward's father or doctor?" I ask then.

"Edward doesn't know I'm here actually," he informs me. "Right now Edward is pretty freaked out and it probably isn't helping that you haven't really confirmed or denied anything," he tells me.

"That's fine I'm willing to have Ethan tested," I tell him.

I watch as Carlisle looks around then and I have a suspicion of what he is trying to find. I stand up and walk towards the bookshelf and pull a photo album out and place it in his lap.

"Ethan Charlie Swan," I inform him as he flicks through the pictures. I watch as he stops on a latest photo and studies it.

"He looks like Edward," he whispers.

I nod. I've tried to deny it for a long time but I'm not silly and I suspect most of the people in Forks that know Edward, aren't either.

He shuts the album then and turns to look at me. "Bella, I don't know what is going to happen after the test but I would like to help out in some way," he says. "Maybe help you out with some money for Ethan," he says.

I look at him shocked. "Its fine Mr Cullen we do ok," I tell him.

"I don't doubt that Bella," he smiles, "but I don't imagine that this is what you wanted for yourself. Maybe with some help you could go back to school part time or even get your own place," he says.

I feel my heart beat pick up when he mentions school. I was accepted and packed to go to Boston when I found out I was pregnant. He's right about one thing working at the Diner isn't what I wanted for my life.

"Just think about it," he says before standing up.

"Why isn't Edward here doing this?" I ask.

Carlisle looks at me then. "Bella," he starts tentatively. "Edward doesn't want anything to do with Ethan," he tells me and I feel tears spring to my eyes as I think about how I'm supposed to tell my son that his father doesn't want him. "Right now he's upset and confused."

"Wow poor Edward," I say sarcastically.

"He came home to announce his engagement to Tanya Denali," he informs me then and I feel like he stabbed a knife in my heart.

"I don't see what that has to do with my son," I tell him.

"He doesn't want any attachments getting in the way of the life and family he wants to have with Tanya," I can tell he's forcing the words out of his mouth just like I'm forcing myself to listen to the bullshit. Edward Cullen is a coward. He knows it, his father knows it, and now I know it.

"Well Ethan and I won't get in his way," I say pointedly. "Thank you for your offer Mr Cullen but it won't be necessary," I tell him.

"Bella just because Edward doesn't want to be part of Ethan's life doesn't mean that I don't want to or to help you. You're entitled to that and I kind of like the idea of being a grandad," he says.

"And I appreciate that Mr Cullen but how am I supposed to explain to my two year old son that you're his poppy. He's going to ask me about his father then and how do I tell him that his Dad didn't want him?" I say sadly.

I can see he gets my point clearly and he nods sadly. "I'll set the appointment up," he says.

"Thank you," I tell him.

When he leaves I try to busy myself with finishing what I was doing before he arrived but too soon it becomes too much.

I'm not proud of the person I used to be but I love my son and it breaks my heart to think that the person I used to be, and the mistakes I made in the past have the potential to hurt him, and it scares me that one day my son might hate me for it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Part 4**

_Edward POV_

"I'm just going to take some blood and hair from you," the Doctor explains to me. "We should have the results back in 24 hours, I've put a rush on it," she adds.

"Thank you," I say.

I don't know how I ended up here but my father insisted that despite whether I wanted to play a role in my son's life that I need to have the test to know for sure. So here I am two days after announcing to my family that Tanya and I are getting married, being tested.

I leave the hospital and I head over to Tanya's parents place.

"Hey, where have you been?" she asks when I arrive.

"Oh I had just had a doctor's appointment," I tell her. Even though I'm lying I only lie as little as possible.

"Oh, is everything ok?" she asks concerned. It's one of the things I love about Tanya she always puts other people before herself.

I smile I hate lying to her but I don't want to hurt her. "Yeah just a check up that's all," I tell her.

"Well I'm glad you're here. Guess what?"

"What?" I ask

"Mum and Dad want to throw us an engagement party," she squeals.

"Oh," I say. That's really nice but I wonder what the point of it is, we don't really have any friends in Forks anymore.

"Just some family and friends," she tells me.

"Ok," I agree. I'll do anything for Tanya and maybe a party will keep my mind off Bella and the possibility that I'm the father of her son.

I sit nervously in the waiting room the next day as I wait for the Doctor to come in with the results.

"Hi Edward, come on in," she tells me and I jump up anxious and follow her into her office.

"Ok I have the results," she says opening the file as we both sit down.

I nod and I'm holding my breath as I wait for her to tell me yes or no. "Firstly, I should explain to you that DNA tests are 99.9% accurate Edward," she says and I nod that I understand, its standard biology after all. "Well congratulations Edward, you're the father of Ethan Swan," she smiles.

My mouth falls open. "I-I," I stutter not quite knowing how to respond all I know is that this isn't the news I hoped for.

"Thank you," I finally say as I stand up. "Um will you inform Bella?" I ask then.

She nods at me then.

"Ok thank you," I say again before I turn and practically run out of the office.

_Bella POV _

"Mama come play," Ethan calls out from the floor where he is playing.

"Just a second baby," I call back as I shove the last bit of my sandwich in my mouth. I'm just about to join him when the phone rings so I make my way over to it.

"Hello," I say.

"Ms Swan?"

"Yeah," I say and swallow nervously I know what this call is about.

"Hi Bella, its Dr Reece," she says.

"Hi," I say.

"I won't keep you Bella, I know you're anxious for the results," she tells me and I nod even though I know she can't see it. "Edward Cullen is the father," she says and I finally release the air I've been holding.

"Ok," I say tears immediately coming to my eyes. I already knew that he was but hearing it officially makes it all seem so much more real.

"Mama," I hear Ethan cry out to me again and it reminds me that he's here and I can't lose my emotions in front of him.

"Thank you," I say.

"You're welcome Bella," she tells me before we end the phone call.

I wipe my eyes before turning and walking towards Ethan. "Ok buddy, what are we doing?" I smile and sit down next to him.

"We buildin a house mama," he tells me in that exasperated two-year-old type of way and I can't help but laugh. Edward Cullen is the one that is losing here as far as I'm concerned because our son is absolutely beautiful.

Later that day after I have just gotten Ethan down for a nap Alice stops by.

As soon as I open the door I let the tears go. "Oh sweetie," she says. I've been holding it all in since the day I saw Edward sitting in the Diner and I can't hold it in any longer.

"So he's the father?" she asks but she already knows the answer, we both have ever since Mike's came back negative.

I nod against her chest. "Ok so now you have to talk him."

"What's to talk about Alice? He doesn't want anything to do with us. He sent his own father to offer me money and that's it," I cry. "I don't want the money Al I just want my little boy to have a Daddy."

"I know you do sweetie," she comforts me. Alice is the best friend a girl could ask for. She has been there with me through absolutely everything and when she had the chance to leave Forks and move to New York she stayed for me, because I was pregnant. I don't know what I would have done without her.

"What am I supposed to tell him Al?" I ask her then. "What am I supposed to say when he asks me why he doesn't have a daddy like all the other little boys?"

Alice looks at me then and I could tell that prospect hurt her as well; sometimes Ethan was like her child too. "You tell him that he has a mummy, grandparents, an Uncle Jasper and an Aunty Alice who love him so much," she tells me and I have to smile.

"Thank you," I tell her.

"You're welcome sweetie," she says.

_Edward POV_

I drive around town for hours after leaving the hospital. I know I could go home and talk to my Dad but every time we've talked since I told him my suspicions two days earlier he's looked at me differently. I can see the shame in his eyes and I can't take that right now.

I know I could go to my fiancées house. I could lose myself in her beautiful eyes or body and everything would be ok but the guilt I feel deep inside stops me and not for the first time in the past three years I think that Tanya deserves better than me, but I'm too selfish and too much of a coward to let her go. I never realised until after my night with Bella how lucky I was to have a girl like Tanya and how much I truly loved her.

After an hour or so I find myself pulling up outside the house I know Bella lived in with her father. I have no idea what I'm doing here but all of a sudden I have a need to see my son. To know his name and what he looks like.

I walk towards the door and I stand there for a few minutes contemplating what the hell I'm doing.

In the end I knock but I'm not quit prepared for what I get when the door opens.

"What the hell are you doing here?" the little pixie spits as me with so much venom I feel like it's burnt me.

"Um is Bella here?" I try to pull myself together and ask.

"Not for you she isn't," she says again.

I open my mouth to say something; I'm not quite sure what but then a small hand settle on Alice shoulder. "It's ok Al," she says so quietly I almost didn't hear her.

As soon as I see her I can tell she's been crying and I wonder if I'm responsible for that and why?

"What are you doing here Edward?" she asks quietly.

"To tell you the truth I don't know Bella," I reply honestly. "I-I," I try to say but my emotions crack.

She moves aside and allows me to enter the apartment. I've never been there before but it's nice. She leads me to the lounge and I sit down before my head falls into my hands. Bella just sits beside me and doesn't say a word; I have no idea where Alice went.

I look up then and ask the one question that's been on my mind since I saw her and her son days earlier. "Why didn't you say something?" I ask.

I watch her fidget with her hands nervously. "I thought Mike was the father. He got tested but it was negative. Ethan was already one by then and it seemed too late," she tells me.

"Ethan?" I whisper.

"Ethan Charlie Swan," she says.

I look around the trying to see a picture or even a glimpse of my son. "He's watching a DVD on my bed," she explains.

"Can I-I?" I ask.

"I didn't think you wanted anything to do with him Edward," she tells me and I can see how much that knowledge hurts her.

"H-How do you?" I ask.

_Bella POV _

"Your dad stopped by," I inform him bitterly.

"Oh" he says. I can't believe after everything we have learnt today that all he has to say is oh.

We sit there in silence for what feels like hours but in reality, is only minutes. "I'm so confused right now Bella," he finally says. "I know that's a shitty thing to say but all of a sudden I'm a father and I wasn't expecting this, I mean I didn't even get a choice in this," he says.

"And I did?" I cry.

He looks at me startled. "Yeah you did. You had the chance to not have him or to tell me but you didn't," he says and I can tell that even though he's not yelling that he's angry about it.

"Wow," I say. "You're an asshole you know that?" I say.

"Bella," he tries to stop me.

"No don't!" I say. "You're right I did have a choice and I chose to have Ethan even though I didn't know for sure if he was yours or Mike's son. It didn't matter to me then and it doesn't now."

"But don't you dare sit there and act all high and mighty with me Edward Cullen. You were there that night too and you were more than a willing participant" I remind him.

"You seduced me," he cries.

"Yeah I did," I say, "but you could have said no. There were a thousand opportunities for you to say no," I tell him.

He goes quiet then like he's thinking about what I'm saying. "You're right," he finally whispers.

I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

"Mama," I hear his little voice call out to me and I watch as Edward's head snaps to me.

"Can I?" he asks.

I hesitate for a second. "Don't do this to him unless you're sure," I whisper then. "If you're not going to stick around and be his dad. Please don't do this to him," I plead. I feel two lone tears roll down my face as I plead with him.

He wipes his own eyes and nods at my words. "Ok," he whispers.

"Mama," I watch as my little boy toddles into the room and I'm immediately on my feet. "How did you get off that bed?" I ask concerned.

"I jumped mama," he grins proud of himself and I can't help but smile. "The moozie over can I watch anada?" he asks.

"Sure," I smile.

I watch as his small little face turns to Edward then. "Hi," Edward says with a smile, his eyes never leaving Ethan for a second.

"Who he mama?" he asks me.

I clear my throat and turn to Edward who has a hopeful look on his face. "This is a friend of Mummy's," I tell him. "This is Edward, Edward this is Ethan," I introduce.

Ethan smiles brilliantly at Edward then. "Hi Edwar," he says and I hear Edward chuckle at the wrong pronunciation of his name.

"Hey little guy," he replies.

"wanna play cars?" he asks then his little face lighting up. I want to cry at the way he's looking at his father and I have to shove the heel of my hand in my mouth to stop myself.

Edward looks at me to get my permission and when I nod he turns to Ethan. "Yeah that would be great," he tells him before following him to the corner where all his toys are set up.


	5. Chapter 5

**Part 5**

_Edward POV _

I'm amazed by the small little boy that is my son as I sit on the floor and play cars with him. Bella has done such a great job with him he's so happy and polite and I can't help but smile proudly at how smart he is and wonder if he gets that from me and Bella.

Bella sits on the lounge and just watches us play. I know she's confused about what I'm doing here. I'm confused myself but I couldn't not see him before I walked out of his life forever. Now though I'm wondering if I'll be able to walk away at all.

I watch as Ethan yawns and begins to rub his eyes and Bella must see it too because all of a sudden she's walking over. "Hey munchkin, I think it's time for you to have a nap," she tells him.

"No mama, me playin with Edwar," he says but while he says it he yawns again.

I laugh at him. "Your mum's right buddy, you should have a nap we can play again some other time," I say without thinking.

"Weally?" his little eyes light up.

"Yeah," I say.

"Come on munchkin," she says and reaches down and picks him up. It surprised me at the ease in which she does it considering her small size but Ethan is still fairly small.

Once she leaves the room with Ethan I feel awkward I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do. Do I just leave? Or do I stay and talk to Bella. The decision is taken out of my hands when Bella returns.

"He asleep?" I ask.

"Out like a light," she says.

"Bella," I say.

"Edward," she says at the same time.

"You go first," I say.

"I don't know what you want?" she blurts out.

"I don't know either," I admit, "but for now would it be okay if I just got to know him while I decide. It's a big decision Bella and I'm not the only person involved," I tell her.

"I realise that but he's a little boy Edward and he gets attached easily. What am I supposed to do if in a week time you decide you don't want to be a part of his life? How am I supposed to explain that to him?" she asks me.

I have no idea at all. Right now I feel like I'm being forced to decide between my son and my fiancée.

"I know," I say, "but Bella it's not just me and Ethan I have to consider. There's Tanya too," I tell her.

"Yeah and I'm sure she doesn't know anything about your dirty little secret right?" she asks and I can tell that it upsets her.

I shake my head. "You know what Edward? Ethan is an innocent little boy. I realise that you love Tanya but if she loves you and wants a life with you she'll be able to forgive you for this. But that little boy in there, he won't be able to and down the track you won't be able to forgive yourself either," she says.

"Can I come back?" I ask then.

Bella stares at me for a second and I find it unnerving. She is still at beautiful as she was three years ago maybe even more so I notice for the first time. It's impossible to believe that she has had a baby her figure is still so tiny.

"Ok," she whispers, "but so help me god Edward if you hurt him I'll cut off your dick," she warns me.

"I won't and I'll try to make my decision as quickly as possible," I promise her.

I leave then promising I'll be by to see Ethan soon.

The next day Tanya and I are driving around town when she sees the sign for the Diner. "Oh let's stop I haven't been here in years," she squeals.

"Ok," I say reluctantly. I was going to remind her that we had take away only three days ago but decide against it.

The place is fairly busy with the afternoon crowd but to my relief Bella isn't here. I don't know why I want to keep her and Tanya apart it's stupid really it's not like Tanya will be able to tell from just looking at Bella that we had sex once.

I haven't been able to stop thinking about Ethan since the day before. When I got home the night before I finally sat down and talked to my father. He was surprised and happy to hear that I had met Ethan and expressed his hope that I would decide to accept my son once again telling me that if Tanya loved me she would understand. I really want to believe that, and in a way I should have more faith in Tanya but I'm just not willing to risk it.

We place our order and have just begun to eat it when I hear his little voice call my name. "Edwar," he squeals and I look up just in time to see him running towards me.

"Hey there buddy," I can't help but smile as I look down into my son's eyes.

I chance a glimpse at Tanya and I can tell she's confused. "Ethan this is my friend Tanya," I explain to him but he goes all shy and drops his little head.

Renee Swan rushes from the backroom then obviously looking for Ethan.

"Ethan," she calls out to him. "It isn't nice to run away from me like that," she tells him.

"Sorry," he says.

She notices us then her smile dropping slightly for a second before she plasters it back on, obviously she recognises me. "Hi, I'm sorry if he's bothering you," she says.

"Not at all Mrs Swan," I say.

"He's so adorable," Tanya adds, "is he yours?" she asks.

"God no," Renee laughs. "He's my grandson," she says.

Tanya just smiles at her.

More people stream through the front doors then and Renee looks around panicked before looking down at Ethan.

"He can sit with us for a while if you like," I offer.

Tanya looks at me stunned.

"Are you sure?" she asks a little unsure.

"Yeah it's fine," I tell her. "You wanna sit with me buddy?" I ask Ethan roughing his hair up.

"Yep!" he squeals. "Can I have ice cream?" he asks then and I can't help but chuckle.

"You have to have lunch first," Renee says.

"Are you sure you don't mind Edward?" she asks then.

"It's fine honestly," I assure her looking forward to seeing how Tanya and Ethan interact.

"Ok well I'll get him something to eat. I shouldn't be long I'll just help get some of these orders going," she says.

"Go its fine," I wave her off.

I lift Ethan up then so he's sitting in my lap and he comes to me easily.

"He's Bella's son right?" Tanya asks me then.

"Yeah," I answer.

"He looks exactly like her," she says then to my surprise. I mean is she blind? Ethan doesn't really look like Bella at all. He has my hair even though its more Bella's colour and my eyes I look down at him I do notice that his nose is very small like a button and realise that he does have Bella's nose.

I don't reply to Tanya though.

"So buddy want do you want to eat?" I ask Ethan.

"Ice cream," he tells me with big eyes and I chuckle at him.

"Nope you heard Nanna, no ice cream until you have some lunch so what will it be? Nuggets?" I ask him.

His little eyes light up then. "Ok, I'll go and tell Nanna you sit here with Tanya ok?" I say as I stand up and place him in the seat and make my way over to Renee.

When I return I can see Tanya trying to talk to him but Ethan's little head is down. I didn't realise he was shy and remind myself to talk to Bella about it later. He wasn't shy with me.

"Edwar!" he says when I come back and stands up so I can sit back down before he plops himself in my lap.

"Seems like you made a friend there," Tanya comments a little confusion in her eyes as she looks at us.

"Yeah, Ethan and I are friends from way back hey buddy?"

"Yep," he nods.

"We met the other day when I was in here," I shrug trying to play it off like it's no big deal.

"I wonder who his father is?" she says then and I stiffen beside her. "Do you know?" she asks.

"Um no, doesn't really matter," I say.

Renee delivers Ethan's nuggets then and I watch in amusement as he digs in and ends up with sauce all over his little face. Once he's done I pick him up. "Come on little buddy let's get you cleaned up," I say.

"I'll be back in a minute," I tell Tanya.

I watch her smile and nod before I walk away with Ethan. I wash his little face, help him go to the toilet and wash his hands before picking him up and making our way out.

"Mama," he yells when we walk out of the toilet and when I turn around I see that Bella has just walked out of the back room.

She smiles when she sees Ethan but her smile drops a little when she realises he's in my arms. "Ethan," she says. "Edward what are you guys doing?" she asks.

"Um the restaurant got busy and your mum needed to help out so I offered to look after him while he ate his lunch," I explain nervously.

"Oh great thanks," she says. "I've been out but I can take him now if you like," she says offering her hands out to him. Ethan goes to her easily and I smile at the picture of mother and son.

"Edwar play cars?" he asks then.

"Oh honey I'm sure Edward is busy," Bella tells him and his little lip begins to quiver.

"How about I come by tomorrow?" I suggest and I reach out and tug on his little hand. "Would that be ok buddy?" I ask him.

I'm happy when I see that the tears don't fall and instead he nods. "Is that ok?" I ask Bella.

"Sure but in the afternoon? I have to work most of the day," she says.

"Ok," I nod.

I walk back into the Diner then. "Where's Ethan?" Tanya asks.

"Oh Bella got home so she took him," I say.

"Oh," she says, "I would have liked to see her," she says and I'm a little surprised. Tanya and Bella moved in different circles at school. As far as I know Bella never had a problem with Tanya she was just one of those people that Bella never had anything to do with but I know that Tanya never really liked Bella. I'm not sure why but I think it had to do with the fact that Bella beat Tanya out for valedictorian.

"Does she still work here?" she asks.

"Um she was the other day," I say.

"Fancy that," she laughs a little. "Valedictorian of our year and working at the Diner," she says. I stop and look at her then with a frown. The comment was really bitchy. It was more the way she said it though that irked me, Tanya isn't normally like that.

"That's not very nice," I tell her. "She's a mum some people would consider that an achievement," I tell her feeling the need to defend Bella for having the guts to give up her dreams to raise our son. A lot of other woman wouldn't have, including Tanya. One of the reasons we never slept together during high school was because of Tanya's fear of teenage pregnancy.

"Of course," she agrees with me, "I just don't think it was Bella's dream that's all," she says before walking past me and towards the cash register. I watch as she pays our bill then before we make our way out of the Diner.


	6. Chapter 6

**Part 6**

_Bella POV_

I look around at the massive crowd already packing out the Diner and the line up at the door and I know I'm in deep shit. My parents left this morning for a holiday in Florida and two of my waitresses called in sick twenty minutes ago for the day and I've just found out that there's some sort of convention in town.

"What the hell is going on Bella?" Alice asks me when she walks in. She offered to look after Ethan for me for the day whilst my parents are away and she's here now to pick him up.

"I'm in deep shit," I tell her. "Lisa and Jenny just called in. I can't run this restaurant by myself," I say.

"I'll help," she automatically volunteers.

"Then who will watch Ethan?" I ask worried. Right now he's still in bed but he'll be up any minute.

"Um…" she starts.

"Jasper?" I ask.

"Working day shift," she says. Jasper is a security guard over at the hospital. When he's not working he sometimes helps out with Ethan playing a male role in his life and he picks up the odd shift at the Diner still for extra cash.

"Your mum?" I ask.

"She left this morning to pick up stock for the shop," she sighs.

"I could ring Jake?" I'm grasping at straws now. What I really should be doing is taking orders but we're not even open yet I just had to let people in because the line was so big.

"I'll call," she offers and pulls out her phone to dial. Jake is my childhood friend. His father Billy is best friends and fishing mates with my Dad and so Jake and I have known each other since birth.

"No answer" she tells me.

"Shit," I curse. I know I only have one more option it's just the thought of ringing him and asking him for something that I hate. Not just that. The more time I allow him to spend with Ethan the more I'm setting my son up for heartbreak when Edward and his fiancée leave Forks again.

"Ok," I sigh. "Can you put an apron on and start taking orders?" I ask. "Also let them know that it's going to be a wait. I've called in Jared to work with Paul but the kitchen is only so big," I say.

"Sure but what about Ethan?" she asks.

"I'm going to ring my last option," I sigh before rushing into the back room and picking up my cell. I'm glad now that I let Edward give me his cell number the other day it saves me from having to look his parents number up from the phone book.

_Edward POV _

I'm lying in bed with Tanya when my cell phone starts ringing. It's one of those rare occasions that she stays over. Our parents don't really approve of us sleeping together in their houses but my parents were out late last night so Tanya just stayed.

"Hello," I mumble into the phone.

"Edward?" the girl on the other end says hesitantly and I sit up wondering who the hell this is.

"Um yeah, who's this?" I ask.

Tanya has woken now and is staring at me curiously.

"It's Bella. Listen I'm sorry to call especially this early but I have a problem and I didn't know who else to call," she says.

I push back the covers and hop out of the bed to make sure that Tanya can't hear me but her eyes follow me and I remember that I'm naked.

"No it's fine what's up?" I ask her.

"My parents have gone away and everyone else I know is working or unavailable and there's a convention in town, so the Diner is packed," she rambles on.

"Bella," I say cutting her off, "what do you need?"

I hear her sigh. "Can you look after Ethan today?" she asks and I can tell by the sound of her voice that she's tired and that it's taken her a lot to ring and ask me for something.

"Of course," I say without a second thought. "Give me ten minutes to get dressed and I'll be by and pick him up," I offer.

"He's not out of bed yet so don't rush," she tells me.

"Ok," I nod.

When I hang up I turn back around and Tanya is sitting up in bed looking at me and obviously waiting for an explanation.

"Was that Bella?" she asks clearly confused. "What does she want?"

"She's in a bit of bind and needs someone to look after Ethan for the day," I explain reaching down and picking up my boxers and pulling them on.

"So why did she ring you?" she asks.

I shrug as I walk towards the closet to grab some stuff to wear. "Maybe because Ethan likes me and she didn't know who else to call," I say with my back to her so she doesn't know I'm lying.

"But we were going shopping today," she reminds me.

"We can go tomorrow right?" I ask.

"Edward I'm going away tomorrow remember," she reminds me.

"Shit," I curse. Tanya had planned to go away for a week with her parents to see some relatives that she hadn't seen in a while.

"We can still go baby we'll just take him with us," I say then.

"You like this kid don't you?" she smiles.

"Yeah I do," I shrug. "He's cool," I add.

"Ok then," she grins.

When I pull up at the Diner fifteen minutes later I see what Bella's means. The place is packed there is even a line out the front door.

I enter through the back door and poke my head out the back room to get Bella's attention.

"Thank you so much for this," she says coming towards me.

"Its fine," I smile. "I'm looking forward to it," I tell her.

"Ok, so upstairs I have a bag packed with some spare clothes and some snack stuff for him. There also a bag with a few toys which I had packed for Alice to take," she explains quickly.

"Is he up?" I ask her.

"No," she frowns pointing to the baby monitor on her hip.

"Do you mind getting him up and dressed?"

"No that's fine but what about clothes?"

"They're lied out near his bed," she says.

"Ok," I smile.

"Come back down when he's up so I can say goodbye and I'll have some breakfast for you."

"Ok," I tell her.

When I head upstairs Ethan is still sleeping. I hate to wake him but I know I need to.

"Ethan," I shake him gently.

"Mama?" he asks.

"No mate its Edward," I tell him.

He sits up and rubs his sleepy eyes. "Hi Edwar," he says.

"Hey buddy," I say. "I thought we could spend the day together would that be ok?" I ask hesitantly. What happens if he says no?

"Weally?" she asks and I smile when I see he's as excited as I am.

"Yeah," I tell him. "So let's get you up and dressed and then we'll go downstairs and see your mum before we go," I say.

"Ok," he agrees before he gets out of his little bed and tottles into the bathroom.

It's not too long after that we head downstairs. Bella is still very busy but she rushes over as soon as she sees us.

"Hey munchkin," she kisses Ethan and he hugs her back.

"Are you happy to spend the day with Edward? I know you were supposed to be with Aunty Al but she's helping Mummy out ok?" She explains and he nods his little head.

Bella stands up and retrieves a bag from behind the counter then. "Here's some breakfast and there's some juice inside. I wasn't sure what you would want Edward so I just got you want you used to get," she says.

"Also," she hands me her keys. "You're going to need to use my car because it has the booster seat and his stroller is in the back. It's parked in the alley," she says.

"Ok great," I smile and suddenly I'm a little nervous.

"Are you sure you're ok?" she asks.

The masses are getting restless and people are yelling out to her now. "I'm fine. I'll call if there are any problems," I tell her.

Once I get Ethan in the car I hand him his juice and I can't help but smile when I notice that Bella remembered exactly what I used to eat for breakfast over three years ago. We head back to my parents place and I sit Ethan down for breakfast before heading upstairs to see if Tanya is ready. My parents have already left and I have no idea where Rosalie is.

"Who dis place?" Ethan asks me.

"It's my parents place," I explain.

"Ok," he says and returns to his breakfast.

"Ok I'm ready," Tanya smiles as she enters the kitchen.

"Hi Ethan," she says and ruffles his hair.

Ethan frowns at her before he reaches up and fixes his hair. "You want some breakfast sweetie?" I ask her.

She looks though the bag of stuff Bella gave us and pulls a hash brown. "I'm not that hungry," she says.

"Finis," Ethan announces.

"Good work buddy," I smile at him.

"Can we play now Edwar?" he asks.

"No we're going to the mall first buddy but maybe we can stop by the toy store," I tell him and then look hopefully at Tanya.

"Sure," she smiles.

In the end our trip to the mall is great. Tanya gets some shopping done easily spending a couple of hundred dollars on her Dads credit card. She never used to be so into clothes and shoes but since we moved to New York and started university she's changed slightly, it's funny that I'm noticing it now. Maybe it's because I'm wondering how the hell I'm going to pay for her shopping sprees when we're married.

We even manage a trip to the toy store while Tanya goes to Victorias Secret and I can't help myself when Ethan I and I find this really cool Tonka Truck. I buy it for him not really knowing how Bella is going to react to that.

It's four o'clock by the time I take Ethan back to the Diner. Tanya went home an hour earlier because she needed to pack and wanted to have an early night so I bring Ethan home alone.

"Hi," Bella smiled tiredly when I knock on the apartment door.

"Mummy," Ethan squeals when he sees her rushing forward to hug her. "Look what Edwar gotta me Mummy!" he cries and points to the truck I'm holding for him.

Bella smiles. "That's great baby," she says.

I walk into the apartment then and place Ethan's things down and as soon as I hand over the truck he rushes off to play with it in the corner with the rest of his cars.

"Thank you for today," Bella says.

"It's really not a problem, I had fun" I smile and for the first time since this all happened she smiles back at me genuinely.

"So are you right for tomorrow?" I ask her.

I watch her bite her bottom lip. "Um, the convention is still running but hopefully my staff will show up so Alice can take him," she says.

"I can look after him again," I offer straight away.

"I'm sure you have better things to do," she shakes her head.

"No actually I don't and I'd really like to," I tell her.

"Ok then that would be great," she smiles. "Around 8?" she asks.

"Yep, we might stay here tomorrow since all his stuff is here," I say.

"Great," she says, "thank you Edward"

"See you tomorrow Ethan," I call out as I walk to the door.

"By Edwar," he yells back. "Tank you for da tuck," he calls out.

"You're welcome buddy," I grin.

"See you tomorrow," I tell Bella before I finally make my way home.


	7. Chapter 7

**[b][u]Part 7**

_Bella POV _

"So he's sitting tomorrow as well?" Alice asks amazed with the information I share with her about Edward as we share a tub of ice cream later that night.

"Yeah," I smile slightly.

"He's full of surprises isn't he," she says.

"I'm just never sure what to expect. I mean one minute I think he doesn't want anything to do with him but then I see him with Ethan, Alice and I can tell that he loves him. He'd be such a great Dad," I sigh.

"So since I'm not sitting for my fave little boy tomorrow do you need me to work?" she asks.

"You mind?"

"Nah you pay me well," she smirks.

"Thank you," I tell her.

The next morning the Diner is just as busy as the day before but this time we're a lot better prepared with more staff to handle the rush.

Edward is right on time, arriving just as Ethan is starting to wake up for the day and I have breakfast ready for them.

"Thanks," he grins. I can't help but admire the way he looks. He's obviously been working out a lot more in the past three years because the tight shirt he is wearing shows off his very toned body and the blue jeans he's wearing show off his tight ass. Truth is I always had a thing for Edward Cullen I just didn't think a good boy like him would be interested in a girl like me; it wasn't until Jasper told Alice that Edward had a major thing for me that I found the courage to approach him at the party.

The flow of customers doesn't stop all day. I check on Edward and Ethan at lunchtime and offer to bring them some food but Edward has already fixed them some sandwiches upstairs and they're eating away like two peas in a pod.

I feel like I'm ready to drop when the casual staff replaces me at four o'clock. I don't even know how I manage to climb the stairs to the apartment.

Edward is sitting on the couch his head buried in some book when I enter.

"Hey," I say.

He places his books down and smiles at me. "Hey," he says.

I look around then. "Where's Ethe?" I ask.

"Napping," he grins proudly

"Wow you must have tired him out," I chuckled before falling onto the couch beside him. Ethan hates nap time for some reason and most days it's a fight to get him to go down for a couple of hours unless he's so tired he can't keep his little eyes open any longer.

"He didn't go down without a small fight," he replies.

I glance over at his books. "Study?"

"Yeah just getting a head start for next year," he shrugs.

"Law?" I ask with a wistful smile. It's what I planned to do when I got accepted to Harvard.

"Yeah," he says.

I bend down and pull my shoes off then and begin to rub my very sore feet.

"Come here," I hear his voice and I look up startled. He's placed his textbooks on the coffee table and he's gesturing to his lap.

"What?" I say confused.

"Give me your feet," he says.

I hesitate for a second but in the end give up and I'm glad I did when I feel his hands rubbing my feet.

"God that feels good," I say.

"So how was your day?" I ask him interested in what he did with Ethan all day.

"Oh you know played cars and watched a few DVD's, read some books," he tells me and I could tell by the smile on his face that he enjoyed it. "He's a great kid Bella you've done such a great job," he says then which surprises me.

"Thank you," I whisper.

He starts rubbing my second foot then as a comfortable silence settles between us. "I've made a decision," he says then from nowhere.

"What?" I ask shocked. I didn't expect him to decide so soon and I feel dread settle in the pit of my stomach.

_Edward POV _

I watch as a dozen emotions cross Bella's face when I tell her I've made my decision. I thought about it all day but in the end I knew that there was no other decision I could make.

"I want to be in his life Bella," I tell her.

"Y-You do?" she asks me a small smile on her face.

"Yeah," I grin. "He's the most amazing little boy Bella and I already love him I can't imagine walking away from him," I tell her.

I watch as a few tears fall from her eyes and I lean over and wipe them away. "Thank you," I say then. "Thank you for giving me him," I say. I know she could have kept me away from him, denied that I was his father or even fight me when I told her I didn't know if I wanted to be in his life but she didn't. Instead she gave me time to make the right decision that was best for me and I now know without a doubt that it's being a father to Ethan. Her tears don't stop then and she begins sobbing. I pull her into my arms easily and allow her to cry. I have a feeling it's been a while since Bella Swan has really been able to let go and just cry.

I hold her in my arms for a few minutes while she cries and I can't deny it feels nice. When she pulls back she's smiling. "Thank you," she says. "You have no idea what this means to me."

"I do," I tell her. "I want to be here for him Bella and that means I'm going to start helping you out financially as well. You shouldn't have to give up all your dreams to raise him," I tell her. I'm not sure how I'm going to pull it off I've been thinking about it all day. In a way I've been thinking about everything I need to do to avoid thinking about telling Tanya.

"Can I tell him when he wakes up?" I ask her. I don't think I can wait very much longer. It's been on the tip of my tongue all day to tell him, I want to hear my son call me Daddy so badly.

Bella nods and smiles. "Yeah as long as you're sure. You don't want to wait until you can tell Tanya?" she asks me.

"I thought about that but Tanya is away until Friday and I don't want to tell her over the phone."

"Ok so you don't want to wait?" she asks again.

"No, I don't want to lie to him any longer," I tell her.

"Ok," she agrees, "we'll tell him as soon as he wakes up."

_Bella POV _

Edward and I sit on the couch in comfortable silence as Ethan naps. I close my eyes as Edward continues to rub my feet. "Want to stay for tea?" I ask him out of nowhere. I open my eyes and see him smirking at me.

"Yeah that would be great," he says.

I pull my body up from the couch. "Great I better get it started," I tell him.

"Can I help?" he offers.

"Um yeah I guess," I shrug I'm only planning on cooking chicken and vegetables. With all the shit that Ethan eats from the Diner I like to make sure he eats vegies every night.

We move around the kitchen together fairly easily. Edward peels and cuts the vegetables up while I crumb the breast chicken. "So what's it like being back in Forks?" I ask.

He chuckles a bit "well it's certainly different from New York but I have to admit I kind of missed it. There's something about living in a small town," he explains.

"Yeah I know what you mean. I couldn't wait to leave after high school to go to Boston but now that I have Ethan I couldn't imagine raising him somewhere else," I shrug.

I find it shocking even to my own ears but it's the truth. In Forks it's safe and I know that when Ethan is old enough he'll be able to walk down the street or to school. He also gets to be close to his family something that I'm eternally grateful for because my parents have been the best through this whole experience. It's not so great when you have to tell your parents that you're pregnant and that you're not sure who the father is. I will never forget the look in my father's eyes that day but regardless of that he and my mum have done everything they could for me including love and support me when the town had nothing to do but gossip about me.

"It must have been hard doing it on your own," Edward says then.

I look at him and shrug. "It was," I admit, "I don't know what I would have done without Alice and my parents. At times I thought it would have been easier to flee from Forks but I'm glad I stayed," I tell him.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here," he says then.

"You didn't know," I reply. "And even if you did would it have really changed anything Edward? You weren't ready to be a father anymore than I was ready to be a mother," I say.

"True but at least you would have had someone here to help you," he says.

I won't tell him that I did. Mike was great most of the time. He visited from Seattle on weekends he didn't have to play football and I suspected he began to like the idea of Ethan being his child. I remember how devastated he was when the test came back. He didn't come near us for over a month but when he did he brought Ethan a tiny little football and told him he'd be the best uncle ever. He offered to marry me at one stage and as tempting as that the offer was I couldn't do that to either of us. Deep down I know Mike loves me and he loves Ethan as though he was his own, but I didn't know how to love someone until I had Ethan. That little boy has taught me more than I could even imagine.

"Mama," I hear his little voice call to me.

"In the kitchen baby," I call out and a couple of seconds later I hear his little feet pad into the kitchen.

"Hi baby," I smile and bend down to pick him up when he holds his little hands out to me.

"You have a good day?" I ask.

"Yep Edwar and I played cars and tucks," he grins.

"I'm glad," I tell him.

"Hi Edwar," he waves at Edward then as though he hadn't seen him all day.

"Hey little buddy," Edward grins.

"Ok so we're going to have tea soon so why don't you go and play for a few minutes while I finish up," I tell him.

"Ok Mama," he says and when I put him down on the floor he tottles out of the room.

"You nervous?" I ask Edward.

"Hell yes," he laughs, "I mean what do I do if he doesn't want me to be his dad?" he asks.

I can tell right away that Edward is really unsure about how Ethan will take the news so I throw the chicken into the oven before I wipe my fingers with the tea towel. "Come on," I say grabbing his hand.

He drops the knife and lets me pull him out of the kitchen. "Where are we going?"

"I can tell that it doesn't matter what I say the only way you're going to know for sure is to tell him," I say and I see his eyes go wide.

"Ethe? Honey can you come here?" I call out to my son who is sitting in the corner playing with the Tonka truck that Edward bought him the day before.

He puts the truck down and walks over to me. "Yeah mama?" he asks.

"Come sit down," I say and pat the lounge next to me. "Edward and I want to tell you something," I explain.

"K," he says and I help him take next to me.

I look at Edward and then nod for him to ahead. "You want me to tell him?" he asks clearly alarmed and I sigh.

"Ethe?" I start.

"Yeah Mummy?" he replies.

"You know how I call poppy Dad?" I ask him.

He nods his head. "Do you understand why?" I ask him.

He shakes his little head. "Ok well just like I'm your mummy, nanny is my mummy, and poppy is my daddy." I tell him.

"Who my Daddy?" he asks then.

"Well actually…" I begin and then look to Edward.

"I am buddy," he says.

I watch happily as his little eyes light up. "You are? Weally?" he says.

"Really," Edward grins.

"Can I call ya daddy?" he asks then.

"Yeah I'd really like that," Edward says. I want to cry now as I watch Ethan jump off the lounge and go to Edward. This is the moment I've been waiting over 2 years for, when my little boy would meet his dad for the first time and it's more beautiful than I ever imagined. Edward picks him up and crushes him against his chest and when he raises his head and looks at me I can see the tears in his eyes too


	8. Chapter 8

**Part 8**

_Edward POV _

I can't tell you how happy I am that Ethan wants me for his dad. I thought my heart was going to burst when he asked could he call me Daddy now. I stayed and had dinner with him and Bella and then afterwards I helped Bella give him a bath. I'm not sure who ended up wetter though Bella, Ethan or Me. It appears my son loves to splash around and takes every toy imaginable with him into the bath. Bella had to put her foot down though when he suggested taking the Tonka truck in with him tonight.

We're all sitting on the lounge watching Monsters Inc, which is apparently Ethan's favourite movie. I love how he hides his little eyes when a scary party comes on even though he's probably seen this movie a half a dozen times at least. It's nice spending time with him and Bella and right now it kind of feels like we're a family. It's then that I realise that we are, even though Bella and I are just two people who share a child we're still family, brought together by Ethan and we'll forever be a part of each other's lives.

When the movie ends Bella looks at the clock. "Ok munchkin time for bed," she tells him.

"I's not tired mummy," he says.

Bella chuckles. "Of course you're not but how about you get into bed anyway and I'll read you a story," she bribes him. He seems to fall for it though his little face seems pleased with her answer

"Can Daddy read tonight?" he turns and asks then.

"I'm sure he could," she answers him. "But you'll have to teach him which books are your favourite," she tells him.

"Ok," he says jumping off the lounge. "Come ons Daddy I'll show you," he says and he takes my hand and leads me into his small room, which is just off Bella's bedroom. The apartment that Bella and Ethan share with her parents isn't very big and you can already see where Ethan is starting to outgrow the very small bedroom, which only has room for a bed and dresser. There is a pile of books by his bed and he picks out a few and shows them to me.

A half an hour later Ethan is yawning but he refuses to give up the fight. Bella leans against the doorframe and smiles at us. "Still fighting?" she whispers.

"Yeah," I nod.

I hop up off the bed as she approaches and kneels down beside him. "Night baby," she whispers tucking him tightly and kissing his forehead. I watch as she brushes his bangs out of his eyes.

"Night mummy," he sighs his small eyes closing. "Night Daddy," he adds and then he finally falls asleep.

I'm still smiling as I follow Bella back out to the living room. "Do you want a coffee?" she asks.

"Sure," I say.

"So if you don't mind me asking what kind of hours do you work at the Diner?" I ask.

"Um about 40 on average," she shrugs.

"What do you do with Ethan?" I ask.

"Most of them my mum takes him, she doesn't work too often at the Diner but if she can't then Alice normally sits for him," she explains.

"I'm glad you have help," I tell her.

"Yeah I'd be in trouble without it," she chuckles.

"So do you need me to look after him tomorrow?" I ask.

"Well, things will be back to normal at the Diner but if you don't have anything else to do and would like to take him then that's fine." She smiles.

"Thanks," I say.

I finish off my coffee and decide it's time to head home, with any luck my parents might be still up and I'll be able to tell them about Ethan.

"Thanks for today," Bella says as she walks me to the door.

"No thank you. You've been really great about this Bella," I tell her.

I watch her blush. "I just want what's best for Ethan and its obvious how much he loves you," she tells me.

My parents are both still up when I walk in the front door ten minutes later.

"Hi," I smile.

"Hey honey where have you been?" My mum asks. I wonder if it's as weird for her having me home as it is being home.

"Actually," I grin flopping down in the couch across from then. "I've been with Bella and Ethan," I explain.

My Dad puts the book down he's reading and I see I've caught his attention. "Really?" he asks and he seems genuinely surprised.

"That's nice honey," My mum smiles.

"And tonight we told Ethan that I'm his Dad," I tell them.

"Does that mean what I think it does?" Dad asks me.

"Yeah. I'm going to be a part of Ethan's life for good now," I say.

My mum places a hand over her open mouth and she begins to cry. "I'm a grandmother," she says and then turns to my dad. "We're grandparents," she says.

My dad laughs. "I know honey," he says patting her hand.

"Can I ask what made you decide to tell him?" he asks.

"Bella rang me yesterday morning; she was in a bind and had no one to sit for Ethan. It made me realise how hard Bella does it, I mean she's responsible for this little boy all by herself and apart from the help she gets from her parents and Alice she doesn't have anyone, yet she was willing to let me choose whether I want to be a part of his life. I know it took a lot for her to ring me," I say. "And then I spent the day with him. Tanya and I took him shopping and I had the best time, I offered to look after him again today," I explain. "And after today I just knew. He's such a wonderful little boy and there was just no way I could walk away from him." I smile.

"I'm so proud of you," My father tells me and he has no idea how much that means to me.

"Thank you I'm proud of myself," I nod.

"What did you tell Tanya?" mum asks me then.

"I just told her yesterday that Bella was in a bind and needed someone to sit for Ethan which she seemed to accept," I said. "But I plan on telling her everything this weekend," I inform them.

"Edward the engagement party is on Saturday night," mum frowns.

Shit. I completely forgot about that I'll have to wait until afterwards because there is no way I'm going to ruin Tanya's party.

"I'll tell her Sunday," I say.

"Do you think it's a good idea waiting that long?" Dad asks.

"I'd rather not but Tanya is in California with her parents and I won't tell her over the phone. I owe her more than that," I say.

"And what if Tanya can't accept Ethan?" mum asks.

"I honestly don't know," I tell her. "I'll deal with that when the time comes," I say.

"Edward you need to think about this because it's a real possibility. Now that you've told Ethan you can't just walk out of his life if Tanya makes you choose," he tells me pointedly. He doesn't tell me something that I don't already know. I just don't want to think about it. I know I can't walk away from Ethan now, I promised Bella I wouldn't do that to him and I won't but I will also do anything I can to keep Tanya too.

"I know," I say.

They leave it at that then which I'm glad. "So when can we meet him?" my Mum asks and I see her eyes light up.

"As soon as I tell Tanya then I'll tell Rosalie and we can set something up," I tell her.

I see her head swimming with idea. "Not too many people all at once," I tell her with a laugh. But to tell you the truth I'm just so happy that my parents have been so accepting of this, so far things are turning out great.

I head upstairs then to call Tanya.

_Bella POV _

It's been two days since we told Ethan that Edward was his Dad and so far everything is going great. Edward has been looking after him, which is wonderful for me, but I think Alice is starting to go through Ethan withdrawals.

"I miss him Bella," she whines, "when is it my turn?" she asks.

I laugh at her as she follows me around the Diner. "Alice, Edward has only just met him; give him some time to get to know him ok?" I tell her.

"Ok," she sighs.

"So what did Tanya say?" she asks me.

"Um, he hasn't told her yet," I shrug. "She's been away but she gets home today so I guess he'll tell her tonight."

I watch as Alice frowns then. "Um I doubt that somehow," she tells me. "Tomorrow night Tanya's parents are throwing them an engagement party at the country club," she explains.

"Oh," I frown. Edward didn't mention that but I'm not surprised it's not like we really talk about our private lives just about Ethan.

"He hasn't asked can he take Ethan?" she asks.

I shake my head.

"Well he could take my place," she groans and I look at her surprised. Alice isn't a fan of Edward's since she found out about the night we spent together; she thought he was asshole for sleeping with me while he had a girlfriend. Jasper and I constantly tell her that she can't be angry with him for that since I knew he was dating Tanya at the time too.

"You're going?" I ask.

"Yeah Edward invited Jasper so of course I have to go," she groans.

"It could be fun," I tell her. I can't even remember the last time I went out anywhere other than a quick dinner with Alice, Jasper, or Mike. I don't think I even own a dress for something like that anymore. My social life certainly went out the window once I found out I was pregnant. Not that I mind because I love Ethan but sometimes I do get lonely and envy Alice.

"Not likely," she tells me.

Edward appears through the back door then with Ethan in his arms and looks around for me. The restaurant is dead so I wave them over.

"Can I have ice cream mummy?" Ethan immediately asks.

"Hey where's my lovin?" Alice pouts at him and he grins and goes to her for a cuddle. "Excellent," she says when he kisses her cheek. "What flavour to do you want cutie?" she asks him.

Fabulous. My son is two and already wooing the ladies. "Alice," I groan.

"What?" she asks. "Bella who could refuse those cute eyes?"

Edward and I chuckle at that and Alice stands up and takes him into the kitchen.

Edward shifts nervously from foot to foot and I watch in amusement, I know he wants to ask me something. "Is something up?" I ask.

"Well I was wondering if I could leave early?" he asks.

I giggle. "Edward this isn't a job and I'm not your boss," I tell him.

"Yeah I know," he smiles. "I just don't want to leave you in the lurch," he explains.

"You're not. Alice is here and she's kind of been missing Ethan anyway," I shrug "I'm sure she won't mind looking after him for a couple of hours," I tell him.

"You sure?" he asks. I hate the way he's looking at me, it's like he's trying to pass a test and he thinks he'll fail if he takes one wrong step. "Positive," I tell him again.

"Great it's just that Tanya is getting home so…" ok that I didn't need to know.

"Good luck," I tell him. "I'll see you later," I add then before standing up.

"Yeah," he says and I can tell he confused about my sudden change in mood. Hell I'm confused myself. "I'll be by on Sunday to see Ethe," he adds then.

"Bye Edward," I say and sigh in relief when he walks off to say goodbye to Ethan.


	9. Chapter 9

**Part 9**

_Edward POV _

I'm still confused by Bella's behaviour as I head over to Tanya's parents place. One minute she's fine and joking with me and the next she almost seems upset. I don't think I'll ever understand women.

"Hey," I grin when Tanya answers the door.

"Hey baby," she grins and quickly comes into my arms. "I missed you," she says. I automatically feel guilty because I've been so busy with Ethan that I haven't had time to miss her.

"Me too," I tell her.

We grab some early dinner and cuddle on the couch watching a movie before Tanya calls it an early night. She's still tired from the trip and she has to be up early tomorrow for the engagement party. I feel bad when she asks me what I've been doing and I tell her not much, I want to tell her so badly that I've been getting to know my son and that he's so wonderful but I hear the excitement in her voice over the engagement party the next night and I know if I tell her I'll ruin it for her. I'm not kidding myself that she is going to be upset and angry with me, and that I'm going to have to earn her trust back. I'm just hoping that she's willing to let me.

"Do I look alright?" I ask Tanya as we make our way into the room her parents have reserved for our party the next night. I'm just wearing a suit with a blue dress shirt minus the tie.

"You look wonderful," she smiles.

Tanya on the other hand looks like a knockout. She has on this little black dress that fits her like a second skin and her hair is pulled back off her face. She really is beautiful.

We mingle with all the guests which I don't know at least three quarters of them, but they're apparently friends of relatives of Tanya and she appears to know them. This is something new for me, I never realised that Tanya's parents were so hung up on appearances. Whilst we dated during high school I didn't really have very much to do with them, but that was probably because they were hardly ever at home.

I see Jasper and Alice enter and I excuse myself from the boring woman who has spent the last ten minutes telling Tanya about her son, and make my way over to them.

"Hi guys," I smile relieved to see some friendly faces.

"Hi," Jasper and Alice greet.

"Wow there's a few people here," Alice comments.

"Yeah," I say, "friends or family of Tanya's and a few friends of my parents." I shrug although right at this moment I can't spot very many of them.

Rosalie joins us then and we end up spending most of the night standing in the corner hiding. I can tell by the looks Tanya keeps throwing me that's she's not happy about it but she continues to mingle along with her parents.

_Bella POV _

I sigh as I step under the shower. It's been a long day and I finally got Ethan down to bed and plan on enjoying a hot shower before sitting down with a chick flick.

I'm just about to start shampooing my hair when I hear a small squeal and then a thump. I have the baby monitor sitting on the vanity and I didn't hear Ethan get up but something inside tells me not to ignore what I just heard so I quickly dry off before throwing on a robe.

When I walk out into the living room I immediately panic. Ethan is lying on the floor near the bookshelf and appears to be unconscious.

"Ethan baby," I cry out shaking him gently but he doesn't wake up.

I look around the notice the computer chair then and I can only conclude that he climbed on top of the chair to get his truck down off the shelf.

"Shit," I cry before jumping up and running for the phone.

I dial 911 and ask for an ambulance straight away explaining what's wrong. Forks is so small that I can hear the ambulance noise when it starts.

I'm at the door when the ambulance officer's rush in. "What happened?" they ask.

"I don't know I was in the shower. I think he fell," I cry. "Is he ok?" I ask.

"He's breathing and his pulse is strong," one of the officers confirms.

"If you need to call anyone you should do it now," they tell me.

I nod before picking up the phone and dialling Alice's number. I don't know who else to call. I throw on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt while I wait for her to pick up.

"Hello," she says when she finally answers. I can hear the noise in the background and I remember that she's at the engagement party.

"Al," I cry.

"Bella what's wrong?" she immediately asks. The noise dies down and I assume she's walked away.

"Ethan fell," I cry tears streaming down my eyes. "They're taking him to the hospital he's unconscious."

"Oh god," she says.

"We're coming right away," she promises.

"Ca-Can you tell Edward," I add. He is Ethan's father after all and he has a right to know; besides I know he would be upset if I didn't tell him.

"Ok," she says.

_Edward POV _

Mr Denali is giving a speech when I hear the cell ring. You would think people would leave them at home when they come to parties like this, it's so rude. When I look up though I notice its Alice and she's walking away with a very concerned look on her face.

She comes back minutes later and after a few words with Jasper they look at me concerned and I know right away that something is wrong.

Jasper speaks to my father then before he and Alice rush out of the room.

It's another ten minutes, after Mr Denali finishes and I say a few words, before I get the chance to talk to my father. He steps forward. "Edward," he whispers.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"Bella called. Ethan had a fall they're taking him to the hospital," he says quietly.

"What!" I say immediately feeling panicked. "Is he ok?"

"I don't know," he says.

"I have go," I say without a second thought.

"We'll take you," My dad says.

"Ok," I nod and begin to start walking off when Tanya's voice stops me.

"Edward," she hisses looking around to make sure someone hasn't noticed. "What are you doing? We're not finished the speeches," she says.

"I have to go," I tell her, "I need to get to the hospital there is an emergency," I tell her.

"What!" her eyes go wide. "What's wrong? Who's hurt?" she asks concerned.

"Ethan," I tell her.

I watch as confusion settles over her features. "So why are you rushing off?" she asks.

"I just have to go Tanya. I need to make sure he's alright," I tell her. I can't wait any longer. I know she's confused and upset with me and I realise then that this is just the first time I'll have to put my son before my fiancée. I walk away leaving her standing there and rush out of the room with my parents.

Bella is standing in the corridor pacing when we all rush in.

"Bella," I call out and she turns her puffy face to me.

I don't hesitate rushing to her and taking her in my arms. "Is he ok?" I ask.

"I don't know they're running tests," she cries into my chest.

"I'll go see what I can find out" Dad offers.

Alice and Jasper join us then and Alice takes Bella into her arms and comforts her.

It isn't long before dad returns with another doctor.

"Ms Swan," the Doctor calls out as he comes out of the examination room.

"Yes," she says walking towards him. I approach too and stand beside her.

"How's Ethan?" I ask.

He looks from Bella to me clearly confused about who I am. "Are you family?" he asks.

"Yes I'm his father," I answer without hesitation.

It takes me a few minutes to register the gasp behind me and when I turn around I see Tanya standing near my parents her hand covering her mouth.

Shit I curse myself. That was not the way I intended her to find out.

I take a step away from Bella and the doctor. "Tanya," I say but she doesn't stop to listen to me she turns and fleas.

"Ethan has a concussion," he explains. "He should be fine once he wakes up. He'll have a killer headache though but we'll give him some pain relief for it."

Bella sighs in relief. "Thank god," she says. "Can I see him?"

"Yes go on through," he nods.

I follow Bella into his room and I almost break down when I see my small son asleep in the big bed. They have a drip hooked up to his arm but other than that he just looks like he's sleeping.

"He would won't wake for a while, he's been heavily sedated" Dad warns "but I saw the head scans myself and everything else looks fine" he assures us.

We sit by his side for a few minutes before something obviously occurs to Bella. "I should call my parents," she says.

"Yeah," I agree.

"You should go after her," she whispers.

"What?" I ask.

"Tanya. Ethan's fine for the moment. Go after her," she says.

I hesitate for a second looking back at my son. "Go. The quicker you go and talk to her the sooner you'll be back," she tells me.

We walk through the doors together and mum, Jasper and Alice immediately stand, I also notice for the first time that Rosalie is here now too. There are a couple of tears rolling down her eyes so I can only assume that my parents have filled her in.

"Is he ok?" they all ask.

I look at Bella and she nods indicating that she can deal with all their questions. I look at my parents. "Which way did she go?" I ask.

My mum looks at me sympathetically before pointing down the corridor. "Try the car park honey," she said.

I nod my thanks and then head down the car park knowing the fate of my future rests on the conversation.


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello everyone. Thank you so much to those of you who have taken the time to review the story. I'm sorry that I haven't replied to you all individually but will try to get to that after this part. I hope you enjoy the new part.**

**Part 10**

_Edward POV_

When I enter the car park I look around and I don't spot her at first. I'm about to give up and go back inside when I hear her small sobs and find her sitting on a bench crying her eyes out. She paints a different picture from the women who was playing hostess only a half an hour ago, her hair is falling out of its hairstyle and her makeup is all smudged.

I watch her wipe her eyes when she notices me standing in front of her.

"Can I sit down?" I ask.

Tanya nods and then moves over and I won't lie and say that it didn't burn. I turn to face her before I speak.

"How's Ethan?" she asks. It amazes me that her concern for Ethan is the first thing out of her mouth and I realise again how badly I've stuffed up and that I could lose this amazing women.

"I'm so sorry," I whisper. "I'm so sorry you had to find out that way," I say.

"So it's true?" she cries looking up at me and begging me with her eyes to tell her it's a lie.

"Yes," I say.

"But how?" she asks then.

I take a deep breath. This is it. "I slept with Bella," I admit.

Tanya cries harder then. "Why?" she asks.

I wish I could answer that without sounding like a guy but it's impossible. How do you explain to your prefect girlfriend that you just did it because you wanted to?

"After graduation I went to a party," I start and Tanya looks up at me with wide eyes probably remembering what party I was talking about. "One thing just led to another," is my pitiful excuse.

"Were you drunk?" she asks me. I wonder if I were to answer yes, would it make me less of a bastard? But it wasn't true and I won't lie to her about anything else.

"No," I shake my head.

"How could you?" she sobs and I hang my head in shame.

"You gave her your virginity and you let me believe that we lost it together," she says. "I saved myself for you," she reminds me and I flinch.

"I'm so sorry," I cry. I'm crying now as I watch how much I'm hurting her.

"How long?" she asks me then.

"How long what?" I ask.

"How long have you known about Ethan?"

I swallow the lump in my throat and dry my eyes "I found out last week," I admit. "I had a test to confirm it."

"Wow," she says. "So that's why you went to the doctors and that's why you've been acting so strange since we arrived here."

"I didn't know what I was going to do right away, if I wanted to be part of his life but I've spent some time with him over the past week and he's so amazing Tanya," I tell her.

"So what would you have done if you decided you didn't want to be part of his life?" she asks and I'm surprised by the question.

"I don't know," I shrug.

"I do," she answers. "You would have continued to lie to me about cheating on me," she says.

I open my mouth to deny it but we both know it's true.

I watch as she stands up then "Tanya," I say.

"You should get back inside to your son," she tells me. "I need to be alone," she adds.

"What happens now?" I ask sounding like a lost little boy.

"I have no idea," she answers before she turns and walks away. I wonder as I watch her go how she got here but I don't have to wonder for long as I watch her slip into the back seat of a taxi. I continue sitting on the bench until the taxi drives away and then I stand up and walk back inside to my son.

_Bella POV _

I sent everyone home. After calling my parents, filling them in, and convincing them that they couldn't do anything by rushing home I thanked everyone for coming but told them that there was nothing they could do while Ethan was still unconscious. With Carlisle there to back me up and the promise I would when he woke they all finally left.

Now it's just me sitting by Ethan's bed and waiting. I'm not sure where Edward is. I suppose he's talking to Tanya, probably begging her to forgive him. "You did tell him to go," I remind myself.

I'm startled out of my thoughts when Edward walks through the door and hands me a coffee. "Hey," he says.

I can tell right away that he's upset and his eyes are red from crying, "You ok?" I ask.

He shakes his head as he takes the seat beside me. "It didn't go so well," he confides in me.

I nod. I'm not sure what to say. I played such a big role in what's happening now with Tanya and while I feel bad about it I can't be sorry because if I were sorry that would mean that I was sorry about Ethan and I'm not.

"Give her some time. She's probably very emotional right now it sure was a hell of a way to find out. Try speaking to her again once she's calmed down," I say.

I can see him staring at me out of the corner of my eye and it's a little unnerving. "Thanks," he finally says and I nod.

We sit together for hours waiting and watching for Ethan to wake. As every minute ticks by I feel my panic setting back in and I start to cry.

"Hey," Edward whispers wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "It's going to be alright," he whispers against my hair.

"I'm so scared Edward what if he doesn't wake up?" I ask.

"Hey don't think like that," he tells me. "Besides you heard my dad, his scans were fine and one thing I know Bella is a wonderful doctor"

I remain in his arms, they feel so good, and I'm so glad that he's here right now.

"Mama," I jump up as I hear his little voice.

"I'm here baby," I whisper as I rush towards his bed.

"My head urts mama," he cries.

Edward joins me now. "Hey buddy," he whispers with a small smile.

"Daddy my head urts," he cries again.

I hit the button and call for a nurse and she appears a few minutes later. "He's awake," she smiles.

"His head hurts," I explain as I run my hands through his hair trying to soothe him.

"Ok we'll give him something," she tells us. "But it's going to knock him out again," she informs us.

We both nod that it's fine we just don't want him to be in pain.

"I'll get the doctor," she says.

The Doctor comes in minutes later. "This will knock him out," he tells us.

"Mama," he cries.

"Shh baby, just go to sleep," I soothe. "I'll be here when you wake up," I promise him.

"Pomise?" he asks.

"Yeah baby we promise," Edward speaks up.

"Love you baby," I tell him then.

"Love you mama, love you dada," he says sleepily.

Edward wraps his arms around me from behind as we watch him fall to sleep. The doctor leaves us alone and I feel Edward's body shaking from behind me and I know he's crying. I wrap my arms around his arms and just stand they're letting him cry.

After a while he pulls back and wipes his eyes. "I'm sorry," he says.

"Don't be," I smile. "You did it for me," I remind him.

I watch him slump into a chair then. "Edward he's going to be out for hours," I say. "Why don't you go home and get a good night's rest," I tell him.

"No I promised I'd be here when he wakes up," he argues.

"You can be. Set your alarm and come back," I say.

"What about you?" he asks.

"I'm going to stay," I smile. It's a mother place to be by her baby's side when they're in hospital.

"Then I'm staying too," he argues.

"Look," I say, "it silly for both of us to be here and get a crappy night's sleep. The nurse will bring me in a camping bed and I'll get a few hours sleep. You should go home Edward you have other things to deal with on top of this," I tell him.

He hesitates for a second. "You sure?" he ask.

"Positive and if anything changes I'll call you right away," I tell him.

"Ok," he agrees.

"I'll walk you out," I say then. I take my cell with me intending on calling Alice as soon as I get out like I promised.

*** _Edward POV_

I feel like a train wreck when I get home. Its midnight but my parents and Rosalie are up when I enter the house. I had to stop myself from telling the driver to take me to Tanya's on a few occasions. Tanya and I never fight and I can't stand the fact that she's going to bed upset and angry with me tonight.

"Hey," they all say.

"Hey," I reply. "Ethe woke up and they gave him some pain killers which zonked him out again," I explain.

They all sigh in relief. "He'll be a bit out of sorts for a few days but he'll be fine" Dad reiterates

"Yeah they seem to think so. I guess they'll run some tests tomorrow," I reply.

"Did Bella stay?"

"Yeah" I nod.

"Did you talk to Tanya?" my mum asks me then and I nod.

"She's upset," I reply.

They all nod not surprised I guess.

"Just give her some time and then try talking to her again," mum suggests and I smile slightly.

"That's what Bella said," I say.

"Well she's a smart girl, always was," Rosalie speaks up for the first time.

I look at her apologetically. "It's ok Mum and Dad explained," she said. "I just can't wait until my nephew gets better so I can meet him," she smiles.

"Thanks for tonight," I say to them. "I'm going to bed," I tell them.

"Night honey," my mum says. "Night Edward," my dad and Rosalie tell me.


	11. Chapter 11

**Part 11**

_Edward POV_

When the alarm goes off at six am I pull myself out of bed. I didn't get very much sleep there was too much on my mind. I drag my ass into a shower and get dressed to head to the hospital. I want to make sure I'm there before Ethan wakes up.

I stop on my way over and grab some coffee and croissants for Bella before making my way to Ethan's room. Visiting hours haven't started yet but the nurses let me walk through to the room without any questions.

When I enter the room it's still dark and when my eyes adjust I see that Bella is asleep on the camping bed beside Ethan, who is still sleeping peacefully.

I take a seat and just watch them while I sip on my coffee. I should be thinking about what I'm going to say to Tanya when I go by there later but right now I just sit there and stare at my son and his mother. Bella is beautiful. She is no longer the sexy teenager that tempted me into bed, I realise that now after spending the last few weeks with her and Ethan. Bella is now a mature woman, a very beautiful one at that.

"Hey," her sleepy voice startles me and when I look down I see her waking.

"Hi," I smile before handing her the coffee I got her.

"Hmm thank you," she whispers taking a sip.

"I bought you some breakfast too," I add.

"You're here early," she comments studying my appearance. I know I look like shit but she doesn't say anything about it, which I appreciate.

"Just wanted to make sure I was here when he woke up. I wasn't getting much sleep anyway," I shrug.

I watch Bella as she struggles to stand up then and I offer her my hand to help, I then pack the bed up for her before joining her on the seats and watching Ethan.

"He doesn't normally wake till eight," Bella points out.

"I'm sorry," I frown. "I should have let you sleep longer," I apologise as I look at how tired she is.

She rests her hand on mine in a comforting gesture. "Its fine I wasn't sleeping that much either," she grins.

I'm not sure what comes over me but I turn my hand over and entwine our fingers and Bella lets me do it. I can see her staring at our joined hands with a little confusion but right now I need her comfort and I'm pretty sure she needs mine.

_Bella POV _

I have no idea what happens but the next thing I know my son's little voice is waking me from my peaceful slumber.

"Mama," he is calling out to me and I see his little face looking at me when I finally open my eyes. Edward is asleep in the chair next me but when I move his head drops since it no longer has mine to rest on and he wakes up.

"Hey," I whisper. "He's awake," I tell him before standing up and walking towards Ethan.

I kiss his little head and he smiled. "How are you feeling baby?" I ask him.

I feel Edward walk up beside me. "Hey buddy," he says.

"Hi Daddy," he says.

"I's ok," he says. "Can we go home now?" he asks me.

"I'm not sure we'll have to ask the Doctor," I explain. I take a step away from the bed to go call the Doctor but Ethan's little shriek has me turning straight back.

"No mama don't go," he cries and his little hands reach up for me to pick him up which I don't hesitate in doing.

"Sit down I'll go," Edward says and I nod my thanks as I crush Ethan to my chest.

"Shh baby," I soothe him.

Edward comes back in a minute later and says that the Doctor will be around during rounds. A lady brings in some breakfast for Ethan then and I sit him back down on the bed and encourage him to eat while Edward and I finally eat the croissants he brought with him.

When the Doctor comes he checks Ethan over and asks him some questions before telling us that he's fine and we can take him home. I sigh in relief because I didn't want to have to explain to my son why he had to stay another night.

"Come on buddy," Edward says swooping him into his arms, as we get ready to leave.

Ethan giggles as Edward throws him high in the air. "More Daddy," he squeals and I smile at the two of them.

Edward drives us back to the Diner and to my surprise he has a car seat for Ethan. "It was my old one and my mum pulled it out for me yesterday," he tells me.

Once we reach the apartment we head inside and I sit him down on the lounge and take a seat beside him and Edward sits opposite us seemingly happy to let me handle this situation.

"Ethe honey?" I start.

"Yeah mama?" he asks.

"Can you tell mummy and daddy what you were doing last night when you fell?" I ask.

"I's wanted my tuck," he says with wide eyes and I curse myself for putting it so high up on the shelf.

"I thought you were in bed?" I question.

"I was," he says. "But I's not tired anymore,"

"Ok mate but next time you should just wait for mummy to get something down for you ok," Edward speaks up and tells him.

"Ok daddy," he nods.

"You really scared mummy," I croak out then. "Don't climb anything by yourself again please sweetie," I say.

"I won't mama," he promises.

"Good," I smile and kiss his chubby little cheek.

_Edward POV_

I take a deep breath as I step out of the jeep. I'm glad my parents kept this thing for me after I left for college or I'd be lost right now. After leaving Bella's apartment after she assured me that her and Ethan were fine I'm out the front of Tanya's house hoping that she might talk to me today.

I knock on the door and a scowling Mr Denali answers the door. "Edward," he says.

I clear my throat. "Hi Elezar is Tanya here?" I ask.

I see him hesitate before he nods and opens the door for me. In the four years I've been with Tanya this is the only time I've never felt welcomed in her house but I can hardly blame them.

I wait in the hallway as he goes to tell Tanya that I'm here. Tanya appears in the hallway five minutes later and she looks about as good as I feel. She's wearing sweats and a shirt and her hair is just pulled back in a ponytail.

"Hi," I whisper.

"Hi," she replies.

"Can we talk?" I ask.

I watch her nod. "But not here."

"Can we go for a drive?" I suggest.

"Yeah," she says.

We drive in silence to the lake and I park so we can get out.

"How's Ethan?" she asks.

"Um better," I tell her with a small smile. "He's home now," I add.

"Good," she whispers.

I am just about to start but she beats me to it. "I should have seen it coming, I knew you had a thing for her in high school," she says.

I'm surprised, I thought she was oblivious. "I wasn't stupid Edward I just figured it was a crush because you were dating me after all, and you always seemed happy with me." she answers my silent question.

"I didn't do it to hurt you. I mean I didn't set out to do it and I was happy with you. It just happened," I stop and tell her.

"Yeah you just went to a party without your girlfriend and just fell into bed with her," she says sarcastically.

"No, I mean…"

"What did happen?" she asks me then. "I mean you said you weren't drinking and that you didn't set out to do it so how did it happen, Edward?"

I gulp. "Tanya is this really important?" I ask her. The information will only hurt her.

"I want to know," she snaps.

We sit down at a bench then and I take a deep breath. "I was attracted to her," I say. "And we started talking and one thing just led to another," is my lame attempt at an explanation.

Her eyes narrow at me. "Did she make the first move?" she asks.

"Yeah," I regretfully whisper. I feel like a dobber and I'm not telling her this so that she blames Bella I just refuse to lie to her any longer.

I hear her scoff, "figures. The slut couldn't be satisfied with half the student body she has to have the unavailable half too," I'm surprised at her bitterness, sure she has a right to be angry with Bella and I but I've never heard her be so mean about something before.

"I made a mistake Tanya," I tell her then, I'm ready to grovel for her forgiveness now. "A big one but I have never lied to you about how I feel and I have never even looked at another women since that day. I love you baby, only you," I tell her.

I watch her shake her head. "You lied to me for three years," she says as she begins to start crying. "How do you expect me to trust you anymore?" she turns and whispers.

"I, of course you can trust me," I tell her but as I look at her face I can see the hurt there and that right now she doesn't trust me at all. "It was three years ago baby," I plead, "I was a different person, we were in a different relationship," I say.

"No," she shakes her head. "I was in a monogamous relationship then. Nothing has changed for me," she cries. "You were the one that was different, you were the one who had a thing for someone else and acted on it. You were the one who lied to me and made me think you saved yourself for me," she sobs.

"I'm so sorry," Is all I can say.

"I know you are but it doesn't change things," she tells me. "And now you have a son with her," she spits at me. "You'll always be around her, how do you expect me to trust you?" she asks.

"Because it's different now. I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. She's different too," I tell her.

"Once a slut always a slut," she spits out and it's obvious where she is placing her anger right now and I feel sorry for Bella because it's not all her fault. She wasn't the one who chose to lie to Tanya about it.

"He's my son Tanya," I say.

"I know that and you should be part of his life," she says, "he looks like you," she adds.

"I thought you said he looked like Bella?" I wonder if she's had a suspicion.

"I just thought he looked familiar," she cries, "It's because he looks like you"

We sit in silence for a while both thinking but eventually I have to break it to ask, "What happens now?" I wonder.

"I don't know," she says. "I really don't know."


	12. Chapter 12

**Part 12**

_Edward POV_

It's been a week since Ethan's accident and Tanya found out everything. A very long week where I haven't seen my fiancée. She has taken my calls when I've rung but she asked me for space and I'm doing my best to give that to her.

Ethan is making a swift recovery, apart from a small headache he's been fine ever since. I think it's been Bella who has had a harder time recovering then anyone. She doesn't want to let him out of her sight. Thankfully though she seems to be fine with me looking after him which is great because I love spending time with him and getting to know him, and it helps to keep my mind off Tanya as well.

Today my parents are having a barbeque and have invited everyone over so that they can meet Ethan. Bella is pretty nervous but her parents, Alice and Jasper will all be here so I know that's easing her mind a little.

I hear Bella pull up so I go out to help her with Ethan.

"Hey," I smile when I see them. Over the past few weeks Bella has become a good friend, and right now she and Ethan are the only thing that put a smile on my face.

"Hi," she smiles back.

I open the back door and pull Ethan out of his car seat. "Hi buddy," I grin.

"Hi Daddy," he smiles back.

"You ready to meet your other nanna, poppy and aunt Rosalie?" I ask him.

His little eyes go wide but he nods. "Good, they're very excited to meet you," I tell him.

Bella and I enter the house together. Her parents arrived a few minutes earlier along with Jasper and Alice so now they're in the back and everyone was just waiting on the guests of honour. I carry Ethan in my arms and Bella walks beside me as we walk out into the back yard.

Everyone is talking but they stop when they look up and notice Bella and Ethan are here.

"Hi," Bella says self-consciously.

"Hi Bella," Rosalie grins and is the first person over. In high school Rosalie and Bella were actually good friends but apparently they lost touch when Rosalie left for school, as far as I know Rosalie wasn't even aware Bella had a baby and she did come home every holiday.

"Hi," Bella replies.

"Hi there Ethan," she says turning to him but Ethan buries his head in my neck.

"Ethe mate this is your Aunt Rosalie remember we talked about her," I say trying to coax him out of hiding.

Eventually his small little head peaks out and Rosalie grins. "Hi," she says again.

"Hi," he replies in almost a whisper.

I watch Rosalie turn to Bella then. "He's so beautiful Bella," she tells her and Bella blushes before responding.

"Thanks," she says.

My parents approach then and this time Ethan doesn't hide he just looks at them curiously. "Remember how I told you about your other nanna and poppy," I say to him and he nods. "Well this is them. They're my mummy and daddy," I tell him.

"Hi," My mum smiles at him.

"It's nice to meet you Ethan," my dad adds holding out his hand for Ethan to shake, but Ethan doesn't understand.

"Your daddy's mama and Dada right?" he asks.

"Yeah honey we are," my mum answers.

Ethan buries his head in my neck again. "Hi Bella," my mum and Dad greets her.

"Hi Mr and Mrs Cullen," she replies.

"Oh it's Carlisle and Esme, Bella," my dad tells her. "You're family," he adds with a wink and Bella looks at him surprised.

"Ethan honey," Bella calls to him. "Why don't you hop down and go and say hello to Aunty Alice and Unca Jasper? They haven't seen you in a while and Aunty Alice really misses you," she tells him.

Ethan nods so I lower him to the ground and he goes scooting off in Alice's direction. I watch in amusement as he gives her a big hug and kiss. I turn and catch my sister glimpsing on in envy.

"Don't worry Rosalie he'll be like that with you soon," Bella tells her with a knowing grin.

"Really?" she asks excited. Rosalie was so excited when she found out that she was an aunt. She didn't get angry with me at all like most people did, instead she focused on the positive of the situation and that was Ethan.

"Yep," she says.

The afternoon just gets better from then. Ethan warms up to my parents and Rosalie and before any of us know it he's playing with Rosalie just like Bella predicted.

My dad and Charlie Swan are standing at the grill and I'm talking to Jasper while the girls gossip about something. One of the other great things about coming back to Forks has been restoring my relationship with Jasper. I didn't realise how much I had missed him until he wasn't there for me. Sure I had friends in New York and they served their purpose but I couldn't talk to them like I can with Jasper.

We're just about to serve the food when the back gate opens and Tanya appears. I almost choke on my beer because she is the last person I expected to see.

"Hi Tanya," my mum greets her.

I see her look around obviously taking in the scene before her eyes land on mine and I'm sure I'm looking at her like a deer caught in the headlights. It's great to see her but I didn't want her to walk in on this scene.

"Hi," I finally say and step forward.

"We're just about to eat Tanya why don't you join us," My mum continues apparently oblivious to how awkward everyone else is over the situation.

"Um, thanks Mrs Cullen but I wanted to talk to Edward," she answers.

I lead her inside. "It's good to see you," I tell her. "I'm glad you're here," I add.

I see her nod but she doesn't look like she believes me. "We're just having a barbeque so mum; dad and Rosalie could meet Ethan. I was going to invite you but I didn't think…"

"No you were right not to," she tells me.

"Will you stay?" I ask with a small smile while I reach out for her hand but she pulls it back.

"I can't, my parents are waiting for me out the front," she explains.

"Oh," I frown.

"I just came to tell you that I'm going away with my parents for a little while," she says.

"What?" I ask.

"My parents had a trip planned to Europe and I'm going with them," she says.

I sit there with my mouth open. "Europe?" I ask. It's a very long way away from Forks is all I'm thinking.

"Yeah," she nods.

"So that's it you're just leaving?" I ask painfully. I notice that she's still wearing her engagement ring though so that gives me a bit of hope.

"Not leaving just getting away," she clarifies defensively. "I need space to think and I can't do that in Forks," she says. "Especially not while you're playing happy family," she adds.

"That's not what's happening and you know it," I fire back angrily.

"I don't want to fight," she says standing up. "I'll call you," she tells me as she starts walking to the front door.

"How long will you be gone?" I ask her.

"A month," she says.

Wow a whole month; I wonder how the hell I'm going to repair our relationship now.

"How are we supposed to sort this out if you're running away?" I ask then.

I realise my words are a mistake when I see the fury flash in her blue eyes. "I'm sorry if I'm not working to your time frame here," she says. "I'm sorry if my hurt and anger at your betrayal is an inconvenience."

"Tanya that's not what I mean. I just…." I look at her standing so close yet so far away from me. "I just miss you and I'm scared that the more time lapses that we're apart the less likely it is we're going to fix our relationship."

"You can't just fix broken trust," she whispers, "You can't just mend hurt."

I close my eyes in pain. "I have to go. We're on our way to the airport," she explains and I nod.

"I'll call you," she says once again. "Goodbye Edward," she says and when I look up I see tears glistening in her eyes and in wonder if this really is goodbye after all.

"See you soon Tanya," I say refusing to say goodbye quite yet.

_Bella POV _

The minute Edward returns from inside the house alone I know that something is wrong. His shoulders are slumped in defeat but he's putting on a nice act.

"Tanya couldn't stay?" his father asks, it's as though everyone is oblivious to what has happened lately.

"Um no," he answers and thankfully his father chooses to just accept his answer.

We eat then and he comes and sits beside me to help me with Ethan.

"You ok?" I ask quietly. I don't ask him very often because it's not my place but I can't stand to see him looking so dejected.

"Tanya left," he replies quietly. "Decided to spend a month in Europe with her parents," he tells me.

I frown and wonder what the hell Tanya Denali's problem is. Sure I realise that she's hurt and angry and she has every right to be but I can't believe what she's doing. Tanya is throwing away a wonderful guy. Sure Edward is human he makes mistakes and he made a huge one three years ago, we both did but I just don't understand why you would let a wonderful guy like him go over something which in the end is really insignificant now. Well that's my opinion anyway, I'd just be glad for a guy like Edward to be interested in me.

"I'm sorry," I say and I really am. I'm sorry that I have turned his life upside down and I just pray that he won't blame me for it one day.

But he smiles gently at me. "Don't," he says. "You don't need to apologise for this, it was all my own doing," he says and I wonder what he means.

_Edward POV_

"I lied for three years Bella," he tells me. "I let her think we lost our virginity together," I add.

I watch her eyes go wide. "You don't mean…?" she asks and apparently she has no idea that I was a virgin the night we were together.

"Yeah," I whisper.

"But why?" she spits out. "I mean why would you let me do that to you?" she asks tears in her eyes and I thank god that no one is sitting close enough to us to hear our conversation.

I'm not sure how to answer her at first. Three years ago my answer would have been simple but then afterwards I became bitter about the whole thing, it was easier to blame her then to deal with my guilt. Now though…

I look into her eyes. "It was you," I say with a shrug and go back to eating my food aware that her eyes are still on me.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hi everyone. Thank you to all of you for your reviews and follows. I really am overwhelmed and appreciative. I hope you enjoy the new part.**

**Part 13**

_A month later_

_Edward POV_

It's been a long month but also a good one. I'm closer with Ethan than I ever thought possible and Bella and I are building an even stronger friendship, which is great since we have a son together. But as the days speed by I realise that sooner or later I will need to make some major decisions. Tanya is due to return in a few days. Like she promised the day she left she did call, she called to tell me they arrived and I haven't had another call since. She does however send fleeting postcards talking about the weather or some wonderful tourist sight she has seen.

I miss her. But I also realise now that my life can't stop for her. I have to make decisions and prepare myself for the fact that our relationship could never be the same again.

That is why I'm getting dressed for dinner. I'm taking Bella out without Ethan so we can talk, but also because in the two months I've been in Forks I haven't seen Bella have one night of fun without our son. Bella doesn't date, she doesn't have alone girl time with Alice, and she very rarely gets a Friday night off. I still remember the shock look on her face the day before when I asked her.

I walked into the Diner and she was working so I waited at my usual booth for her "Hi" she smiles "You want your usual?"

I nod "thank you" I tell her.

She's about to walk away when I grab her hand and pull her back "wait"

"Is something wrong?" she asks worried.

"No" I say "what are you doing tomorrow night?" I ask.

"Um the usual" she shrugs.

"Will you go out to dinner with me?" I ask.

I watch as shock clouds her features "I want to talk to you about some things and I thought we could do it while getting out and having some fun" I tell her. I don't want her to think it's a date or anything because it isn't. I'm still with Tanya and I plan to be in the future.

"Um what about Ethan?" she asks and I smile. I anticipated this so I planned ahead.

"I already asked Alice would she sit and she agreed," I tell her.

"Um ok then. What time?" she asks.

"Seven, and it will be dressy casual," I tell her.

"Ok" she smiles.

Bella is waiting downstairs for me when I arrive and I smile when I see her looking a little dressed up in a pair of nice hip hugging jeans and this beautiful maroon silk top. Her hair is out and I don't think I've ever seen her look so beautiful and I can't stop myself from telling her that.

"Thanks" she blushes "you look nice too" she adds looking at my black jeans and black casual dress shirt.

We head to Port Angeles because there really isn't anywhere to eat in Fork except the Lodge. When we get to Bella Italia I see that Bella seems happy with my choice. "I love the food here," she informs me.

"Good" I say. I do too.

I wait until we're seated and have ordered before I start talking to her. "So I wanted to discuss some things with you" I say.

"Ok" she says.

"Well in a few weeks I'm supposed to go back to New York," I say.

I watch her nod, obviously she realised that already. "And you want to know what's going to happen with Ethan?" she guesses.

"Yes and No" I tell her. "I only have another year and I'll be finished law school" I tell her "I considered asking you if you would move to New York but then I realised that there is no way I could support you there, it's just too expensive and even if you got a job we wouldn't have friends and family to help look after Ethan" I say.

"Edward" she says, "I don't want to move to New York," she tells me.

"I know" I nod "and then I remembered something you said. About Forks being a great place for Ethan to grow up and I realised you were right. I also realised that in Forks I could afford to support you and maybe instead of working 40 hours at the Diner you could go back to school" I explain.

Bella nods for me to continue "so I've decided to transfer for my final semester to UDub" I say.

"Are you sure?" she asks me "I mean you've worked so hard and graduating from Law school in New York is a lot more prestigious then Udub" she says worried.

"I'm sure" I smile. I appreciate her concern about my future.

"Well I mean that's great. I was getting a little worried about how Ethan would react if you went back," she told me.

"I haven't discussed it with Tanya yet but I put my transfer forms in yesterday" I tell her.

"What will you do here?" she asks then.

"Well my mum has offered me a job which is great" I smile. I'm surprised at how excited I am about going to work with my her and being part of Cullen Law Firm knowing that one day it could be mine.

"So I'll work there full time except for a couple of afternoons where I'll have to go to uni"

"That's great Edward," she says.

"Now what about you?" I ask her.

"What about me?" she asks.

"Well I want you to think about what you'd like to do. Maybe you could apply for uni too," I tell her.

Bella sighs, "I'd love that Edward but right now it would just be too hard. I need to work to support Ethan and I. I am going to have to find our own place soon, Ethan is just outgrowing my parents place" she says.

"But now I'm going to help Bella so you don't have to work all the time" I argue.

"Edward, I appreciate any help you can give me with Ethan but it's not up you to support me" she tells me.

"Yes it is" I fire straight back. "You are the mother of our son, you look after him so it's my job to look after you" I tell her. I surprise myself with how strongly I feel about this I guess I've finally just seen how much Bella has sacrificed for our son especially when she didn't have to.

"Thank you" she smiles at me.

"Will you at least think about it?" I ask then "maybe you could so some courses by correspondence" I suggest.

I watch her smile at that "that's a great idea and it won't take me away from Ethan. Maybe next year when he's a little older and day care is an option I'll think about going back to school"

We enjoy your dinner then just discussing some of the smaller details and then I suggest we go to a movie which Bella's eyes light up over. I'm shocked when she tells me that she hasn't been to a movie since Ethan was born, so I let her pick.

At the end of the night we pick up a sleeping Ethan and I drive the two of them home and carry him upstairs for Bella.

"Thank you for tonight" she says.

"You're welcome" I reply and kiss her cheek gently. I'm amazed at how soft her skin is.

"I'm glad you're staying," she tells me then as she walks me to the door.

"Thanks. So am I" I tell her before I say goodnight and head home.

"Edward" I turn and see my mum looking at me as I feed my face.

"Yeah" I say.

"I wanted to discuss something with you" she tells me.

"Sure" I reply.

"Well as you know Sandra at the office is pregnant and she'll be finishing up at the end of the month"

"Ok" I nod not quite sure what this has to do with me.

"Well I need to replace her and I thought of Bella" she said.

"Um ok" I say shocked.

"It pays well and as long as Bella can type and answer a phone, which I'm sure she can, then it would be a lot better for her than working all those hours at the Diner" she continues.

"Mum, wow" I say "I mean that's a great idea, plus Bella wanted to do law so it will help her out when she starts law school" I tell her.

Mum smiles at me and I can tell she's proud of herself. "Will you talk to her about it?" she asks.

"Sure" I say "I'm heading over there now anyway" I say.

My mum's offer amazes me. Since my family found out about Ethan they have been nothing but supportive. But not just towards Ethan and me but also to Bella.

I'm so excited to tell Bella. I see how tired she is after working at the Diner for sometimes up to ten hours and it will be great for her to have a nine to five job, it will also mean that she will probably have some time for those courses we discussed last night.

I decide to head to the diner and when I get there Renee tells me that Bella is at home with Ethan so I head over there.

"Daddy" Ethan squeals when he sees me and hops up and comes running to me.

"Hey buddy" I grin. I know I've probably said it before but I will say it again. I will never get tired of hearing him call me Daddy or the excitement in his eyes when he sees me.

Bella hops up from her spot on the floor "Hey" she greets.

"Hi" I smile.

"Mummy said we go to da park," Ethan informs me then.

I look at Bella and she's grinning guiltily. "Sure" I tell them. The only thing I had planned for the afternoon was spending time with my son anyway and I can still do that at the park.

Since it's a nice day we take the jeep to the park with the top down. Ethan loves it but I know Bella isn't as excited because it's not the safest mode of travel.

As soon as we get there I place Ethan on the ground and watch in amusement as he heads straight to the sand box and make a note to talk to my parents about getting him one for the back yard.

Bella and I take a seat on a bench close by where we can both watch him so I decide to tell her about my mother's offer.

"Guess what?" I say.

"What?" she asks.

"Well my mum spoke to me just before I came over here. Apparently one of the receptionist as work is pregnant and finishing up at the end of the month" I explain.

"Ok" she says and it's clear by the look on her face that she has no idea where I'm going with this.

"She thought you might be interested," I tell her.

Her eyes light up "Really?" she asks me. "Doesn't she want someone with experience?"

"Really. She said as long as you can type and answer a phone then she thinks you'll pick the job up without a problem," I say.

"Wow" she says.

"What do you think?" I ask. "I mean its nine to five, thirty five hours a week," I add.

"I think its great" she smiles "but what about my hours at the Diner?" she asks worried.

"Bella" I laugh "I'm sure that your parents will be able to find someone to replace you, hell isn't Alice always wanting more hours?" I remind her.

"Yeah I guess your right" she smiles. "I'll talk to my parents about it"

"Good" I say.

"So Tanya is back tomorrow right?" she asks. It's not like I could forget but I'm surprised she remembered.

"Yeah" I nod.

"So you think she'll stay in Forks with you?" she asks.

"I hope so" I smile.

"If she doesn't?" she asks tentatively. I'm willing to do anything to fix things with Tanya and if we have to do the long distance thing for a little while I'll make the best of it.

"I guess I'll have to wait and see" I tell her because in the end I have no idea what to expect from Tanya.


	14. Chapter 14

**Part 14**

_Edward POV _

I'm so nervous. I swear there is a whole heard of butterflies flying around in my stomach. I'm on my way to Tanya's house to pick her up so that we can talk. I waited all day to hear from her yesterday but she never called so this morning, not being able to take it a second longer, I picked up the phone and called her. Apparently she was trying to get over jet lag, which is why she didn't call, but I can't help but wonder if it's just another way of avoiding me.

She looks beautiful as she walks out of the house and I get out of the jeep to meet her. I pull her into a hug and am surprised when she pulls back and kisses my lips gently.

"God I've missed you," I whisper and she smiles at me.

"Really?" she asks unsure.

"Really" I tell her.

We don't go far just out to the taco stand on the highway taking a seat out in the sun as we eat a taco and sip on a drink.

"So how was your trip?" I ask.

"Wonderful" she smiles "you really have to go one day Edward there are so many things to see and do. Oh and the shopping" she tells me excitedly.

"That's great"

We continue to eat in silence then and I have to admit it's a little awkward and I never thought things would be like between us.

"What have you been up to while I've been gone?" she finally asks me.

"Not a lot" I admit "mainly just spending time with Ethan" I inform her. I see something flash across her face but it's gone so quickly that I don't get the chance to ask her about it.

"That's good" she nods "I mean it's great that the two of you are close. Hopefully when he comes to visit I can get to know him," she adds.

I think it's great that she wants to get to know my son but when she says visit it reminds me that I need to talk to her.

"Yeah about that" I say.

"Oh Bella is going to let him come to New York isn't she?" she asks concerned.

"Well that's the thing Tanya. Ethan is only 2 he can't exactly be put on a flight" I reply.

"Oh yeah I guess that's right. But we can visit during holidays or your parents could bring him out or something" she suggests.

I swallow the lump in my throat "when I decided to be a part of Ethan's life I decided that if I was going to do it that I wouldn't only do it half way" I start "I promised Bella that as well" I add "I don't want to be a part time Dad, Tanya. I don't want to see Ethan once every twelve weeks. It's not fair to him, he wouldn't understand and it's not fair to Bella," I say.

She's frowning at me now "you don't owe Bella shit" she finally replies. "She didn't even tell you about Ethan you had to find out yourself" she reminds me.

What she says is true but in the past two months I've moved past my anger. When I returned to Forks I acted like a spoilt brat and if I was Bella I wouldn't have wanted to tell me either.

"That's not the point Tanya" I say gently "the point is I don't want to be that kind of Dad"

"So what are you saying?" she asks.

"After talking with my Dad and Bella I've decided to transfer for my final semester and I'm hoping that you'll stay too" I tell her.

"What?" she asks "how could you make that decision without talking to me?" she cries clearly upset. "You should have talked to me about this Edward, not your dad and certainly not Bella Swan"

"I would have if you were around" I say a little bitterly.

"Well I would have been if you hadn't gone off and cheated on me and gotten that slut pregnant" she snaps.

I take a deep breath to calm myself down "don't" I tell her. "This isn't about her," I remind her.

I watch her shake her head at me "so that's it you're just going to give up a great spot in a great law school, our apartment and friends to move back here" she says and she almost sounds disgusted.

"Sure I'll miss those things but at least in Forks I'll have a full time job working with my mum, I'll be close to Ethan and we'll be able to get a great place. Plus we still have friends here" I tell her.

"Correction. You have friends here" she says. "Jasper and Alice were never friends of mine"

"Ok" I say trying not to get angry with her, I know she's just upset "but Rosalie is going to be staying too and I'm sure we'll meet plenty of people at uni"

"We're supposed to go home next week," she whispers.

"I know" I nod. I love New York too but it's just a city that isn't going anywhere.

"So what do you think?" I ask her.

"I think…" she begins quite put out but something stops her and I'm hoping it's that she doesn't want to lose me as much as I don't want to lose her. " I think I need to think about it," she tells me.

I nod I can accept that. I mean I just sprung this on her today.

We talk about her trip a little more and then she tells me she's a little tried so I take her home. She lets me kiss her gently before she gets out of the jeep promising that we can do something soon but those butterflies haven't left and I'm wondering now what they're trying to tell me.

_Bella POV_

It's funny we haven't seen Edward for two days now. I know Tanya is home and I'm wondering if this is the way things will be from now on. I got so used to having him around that I miss him. I don't want to think about that though.

Speak of the devil he has just walked into the restaurant and I watch him look around until his eyes land on me.

"Hi" he says when I walk over to him.

"Hi" I reply trying to smile back. He seems happy so I can only assume things with Tanya went well.

Let me clear something up I don't hate Tanya but do I dislike her? Yes definitely. Why? Well during high school she had something I wanted. I hated her prissy attitude; she always thought she was better than everyone else. Playing the goody two shoes whose daddy bought her anything and everything she wanted. But she had Edward and that's what I hated the most.

Now she still has him and am I jealous? Of course I am. Here I am the woman who had his child and spent the past two years raising him and she still has Edward's undivided attention. I really am pathetic aren't I?

"How are you?" he asks me and he's looking at me a little concerned and I assume it's because I'm frowning.

I plant on my plastered smile "Ok" I tell him. That's the best lie I can come up with. "You?" I ask. I really don't want to know but I might as well get it over and done with.

"Yeah you know" he shrugs "does your mum have Ethan today?" he asks and I nod.

"Yeah" I say.

"Do you think she'd mind me going over, I really need to see the little guy?" he says.

"I'm sure it will be fine. Is everything ok Edward?" I ask again this time really noticing that his smile is almost as fake as mine.

"Yep" he lies again "I'm just going to head over but I'll see you later" he says.

Ok, now I'm really worried as I watch him head back out the door.

_Edward POV_

I'm on my way over to see Ethan when I open the door and find Tanya standing there and preparing to knock.

"Hi" I say tentatively. It's been a couple of days since our talk and I hadn't heard from her.

"Hi" she replies "were you heading out?" she asks taking in the jacket I have draped over my arm.

"Oh I was bored so I was going over to play with Ethan" I answer.

"Oh" she frowns.

"Come in" I tell her then.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes" I say quickly and we walk into my parent's house.

"So I've been thinking," she says as soon as she sits down and I prepare myself for what she's about to tell me. When she raises her head I see that her eyes are filled with tears and I know I got my answer.

"You're not staying" I whisper painfully "are you?"

I watch her shake her head "I can't" she says.

"Can't or won't?" I ask.

"Both" she cries. "My parents are moving to New York Edward," she says then. "So I'm going to move in with them and continue school"

I nod feeling completely defeated.

"And us?" I ask then. I could just deny what I know is going to happen but I decide to get it over and done with.

She doesn't answer me then but when I look up she's crying. I feel a sob start low in my chest as I watch her raise her hand and slide the engagement ring I gave her a few months ago off her delicate hand. I close my eyes to ward of the pain.

"I'm sorry" she cries "but I can't forgive you yet," she finally says. "I'm not ready to share you with someone else" she tells me "I could probably accept Ethan but I can't stand the thought of you being around Bella. I can't trust you with her" she finally says.

She holds out her hand to give me back the engagement ring but I close her small hand around the ring "not yet" I plead.

"Edward please doesn't make this harder" she pleads.

"I won't" I tell her "I'm just not ready for this to be over" I say "so if there is even a small chance that you're going to come back to me then I want you to keep it" I tell her. I won't deny that I'm hoping she'll go back to New York, miss me like crazy and come back for me and I'm willing to wait for her.

She looks at me then and finally nods and I breathe a sigh of relief because it's not over yet.

"When do you leave?" I ask.

"Tomorrow" she informs me. "I'm going to go back and clear the apartment out," she informs me.

"I can come and help" I offer but she shakes her head.

"No need. What do you want me to do with your stuff?" she asks then.

"Um well I'll need the clothes and books and everything," I tell her and she nods.

"Most of the furniture is yours too," she reminds me.

"Keep it," I tell her.

"No" she shakes her head "I'll sell it and send you the money" she says.

After talking through the nitty gritty of what she will do with our apartment and stuff she stands up to leave.

"Bye Edward" she whispers.

"Tanya wait" I say. I don't hesitate for a second. I pull her small body against mine and crush my lips against hers. The kiss is full of hunger, love, and sadness because we both know that this could be our last kiss.

"I love you," I whisper when we pull apart "and I'll be waiting for you," I tell her.

Her eyes are shinning with tears "I love you too" she chokes out before taking a step back.

I don't watch her go because I just can't. I'm not going to cry yet because whilst she has my ring there is still hope that she'll come back to me.


	15. Chapter 15

**Sorry for the repost, uploaded the same part twice with a different tittle and confused myself. I hope you enjoy this new part****.**

**Part 15**

_Edward POV_

It's been a long day. I offered to baby sit Ethan today to take my mind off the fact that the women I love is leaving, and taking my heart with her. Being with Ethan reminds me why I've done what I have and I know he's worth it, but my heart is still aching right now.

I'm just getting ready to drop him back at the Diner when I notice an envelope has been slid under the door with my name on it. After picking it up I instantly recognise the hand writing as Tanya's and hope surges through me.

I open the envelope and I feel like my heart is thumping a mile a minute but my breath stops when something falls out of it and hits the ground in a small thud. I look down and I feel my world falling around my feet. I collapse to the ground then and pick the ring up in my hand.

I search the envelope for a letter, something that explains why she sent me the ring back.

"Daddy," I look up when I hear Ethan. He walks towards me and sits on my lap with his little head against my chest.

"I wuv you Daddy," he whispers. I don't know how a two year old could possibly know exactly what to say but somehow Ethan does and my heart hurts that tiny bit less right now

"I love you too," I reply my voice husky with emotion.

I pick Ethan up then and shove the ring in my pocket. "Let's go see Mummy," I tell him and he smiles excited.

I decide to head straight to the house instead of the diner not wanting to have to deal with all the people right now and relieved when I see Bella's car is parked outside.

"Bella," I call out when I enter. I place Ethan down and he immediately rushes towards the sound of Bella's voice.

"In here," she calls out. I follow Ethan to Bella's bedroom, she's sitting on her window seat writing in what I can only assume is a journal.

"Mama," Ethan squeals when he sees her.

Bella picks him up and hugs him close. "Hey Ethe," she kisses him. "How's mummies little boy?" she asks him.

"Good," he says. I watch her look up at me from my spot near the door with concern.

"That's good baby. Do you want to watch a movie?" she asks and he nods eagerly.

"Mada, Mada," he chants which means Madagascar a movie I bought him last week.

"Ok," she places him on the bed and gets everything set up before approaching me. She grabs my hand and pulls me out into the living room where we can still hear Ethan but also get some privacy.

"Edward?" she questions me.

I pull the ring out of my pocket and show her. I don't need to say anything else because this is Bella and I know she'll understand.

"Oh Edward," she says her voice full of sympathy and probably of guilt. I know she's been feeling bad over everything that has happened with Tanya.

I turn my back and look out the front window and onto the street unable to hide my emotions any longer I finally let the tears that have been threatening to fall since I found the engagement ring fall. Bella must see my shoulders shaking because soon she is pressed up against my back, her small arms wrapped around me and holding me so tightly. I can't even tell you how good it feels right now.

"Shh," she soothes me, "it's going to be ok," she tells me and I wonder how she knows that.

I don't know how long I stand there crying but Bella never lets me go and eventually I let her lead me to the lounge and I sit down and dry my eyes.

"What can I do?" she asks me.

I smile through my tears. "Nothing, just thank you," I tell her.

"What for?" she asks confused.

"Just for being you and for Ethe," I tell her because that little boy is my life right now.

"You're welcome," she whispers and when I look up I can see she's close to tears too.

"I'm just going to go for a drive. I need some time alone," I tell her.

"You sure?" she asks.

"Yeah," I nod, "But I might come back later if that's ok?" I tell her.

"Our door is always open," she tells me.

I drive out to the reservation and pull up and look out over the cliffs and onto the ocean. I'm not really sure why it's never been somewhere that Tanya and I came together but sitting here in my jeep and watching the sun getting ready to set is peaceful.

I turn the radio up when I hear the next song

_[I]She sat me down and took me by the hand_

_She said I'll try to make this painless if I can_

_She was sorry and then she began to cry_

_Couldn't look me in the eye_

_I said baby let me just save you the time_

_I can see where this is going_

_Tears will fall and hearts will break_

_Love's a game we all must play_

_So dry your eyes and be on your way_

_As for me I'll be ok [/I]_

I can't help but think how perfect this song is for the situation I find myself in. So I just sit here and listen to the words and watch as the sun sets on the day like it has already set on my relationship with Tanya.

_[I]Well I thought we were the perfect match_

_It's so hard to say that now we're out of love_

_There was never, ever such a thing_

_Not as far as I can see _

_Not as all of love works so easily_

_I can see where this is going_

_Tears will fall and hearts will break_

_Love's a game we all must play_

_So dry your eyes and be on your way_

_As for me I'll be ok_

_We're gonna be ok_

_Yeah_

_I can see where this is going_

_Tears will fall and hearts will break_

_Love's a chance we all must take_

_So dry your eyes and be on your way_

_As for me I'll be ok [/I]_

The song finishes just as the sky starts to get darker. I realise that I should leave or I might never find my way back to the main road. I start the jeep and push it into gear and slowly head back towards Forks. I'm not sure where to go though, should I go home? Or should I go to Bella and Ethan. It doesn't seem fair to weigh Bella down with my problems.

Driving into town I pass the diner and see Bella's car is there so I pull up. I look at the clock I realise I've been gone for hours and my stomach is growling. I walk into the restaurant and find Bella and Ethan sitting in a booth with Jasper, Alice, and strangely enough Rosalie. Bella looks up when I enter and smiles so I make my way over.

"Hi everyone," I say.

They all greet me back and it's obvious that Bella hasn't said anything to them which I'm grateful for as I take a seat next to her and put Ethan in my lap.

"We haven't ordered yet," Bella informs me.

"Cool," I nod.

"So Edward, Bella told us that you were staying in Forks?" Alice says.

"Yep," I nod.

She studies me carefully. "That's good," she says and for the first time since I returned to Forks two months ago Alice Brandon smiles at me.

"So what about Tanya is she staying too?" Jasper asks then.

I stiffen in my seat and I feel Bella's hand grasp mine underneath the table. "Um actually no Tanya has gone back to New York," I inform them.

"Oh," Rosalie says looking up surprised.

"So Rosalie, Edward mentioned that you were transferring too?" Bella says trying to change the subject before anyone could ask any more questions and I'm grateful for it.

"Yeah," she smiled, "I didn't like it in Boston very much," she admits. "Too cold and sunny, I like my cold wet" she adds and we all laugh.

Once we're finished I offer to take Ethan home and get him ready for bed. Renee and Charlie are so used to me coming and going with him now that it's not uncomfortable

"His PJ's are out," she tells me and I nod before leaving.

_Bella POV _

As soon as Edward leaves Rosalie looks at me in concern and I sigh because I know she's not going to let me get away with this.

"Is he ok?" she asks.

"Yeah what's the go with Tanya?" Jasper asks.

"She left," I answer.

"So did they break up?" Alice asks.

"He hasn't said much about it but I assume so yes," I tell them. "Look I think you should let him tell you himself," I say.

They all agree so I say goodnight then and head home to see how Edward is going with Ethan.

I head straight to Ethan's room when I enter and I find Ethan curled up asleep so with a soft kiss I go in search of Edward determined that I'm going to make him talk about what's going on before it eats him alive.

I head into my room then and looking around I don't notice him until I take a closer look outside and see he is sitting on the small.

I climb through the window quietly and move towards him. I'm surprised when Edward opens his eyes and smiles at me before opening his arms out for me.

"Come here," he whispers.

I go to him and allow him to wrap his arms around me. "Talk to me?" I whisper.

He chuckles a little, "Do we need to?" he says.

I sit up and look at him. "Well you should talk to someone. Call Jasper and go and get plastered if you don't want to talk to me," I suggest. "You just broke up with your girlfriend of 4 years," I say completely exasperated.

I see his act crack then. "Bella," he croaks.

"What happened Edward?" I ask.

"I asked her to stay and she said she couldn't," he whispered, "she wasn't ready to forgive me or to trust me around you."

I cover my mouth to stop my gasp. "Oh god Edward I'm so sorry," I whisper.

"I told her I was willing to wait until she was ready, I told her to keep the ring as long as there was still a chance," he cries.

Oh god it all comes clear now, he thought things would work out, that even though she was leaving that they would find their way back to each other.

"Then this morning I found it in an envelope that she slipped under the front door," he cries. "She didn't even leave a note Bella"

I hold him while he cries, he needs to let this all out it's the only way that he'll move forward with his life. Obviously Tanya wasn't the understanding or loving person that we all thought she was. Sure I never expected her to give up her life and move to Forks to play Step Mother to my son, hell I didn't even want that but I didn't think she would let Edward go.

"Four years and it's done," he whispers eventually as he wipes his eyes.

"I bet you're wishing you never came back hey?" I say sympathetically.

"No I will never feel that way," he says taking my smaller hand in his own. "I made a mistake sleeping with you that night Bella," he says softly. "I had a girlfriend and it was wrong but I will never regret Ethan," he tells me.

I nod through my own tears; it hurts hearing him say it was a mistake to sleep with me. I remember it as one of the best nights of my life but to Edward it will always be a mistake. A mistake that cost him the love of his life even if it did bring him Ethan.

"He's the best thing in my life," he finishes and I nod my agreement because I feel the exact same way.

I lay my head back down on his chest then and we both fall into a comfortable silence. It dawns on me then what I've gotten myself into. I'm in love with a man that is never going to love me back. He loves our son and he will be my friend because of that but he will never love me.

It was a mistake.


	16. Chapter 16

**Part 16**

_Bella POV _

_A month later _

"Edward," I whine as he pulls me out of my parent's apartment and into his banged up jeep. Have I mentioned to you how much I love this car, yet hate it at the same time? When I was a teenager I dreamt of driving around in this car with Edward, as his girlfriend but now every time I hop into it reminds me of the past. It doesn't help that the thing is a death trap and I'm scared to death every time my son travels in it.

"You really need to get a new car," I tell him.

Edward just chuckles at me. "I will I promise," he smiles.

Edward started working at his mother's law firm the week before and I start on Monday. After talking to my parents and all of us agreeing that it was an excellent opportunity for me, I decided to take the job. The money is a lot better and I actually think that my plans to get an apartment for Ethan and I are going to happen sooner than I had hoped.

He's come a long way in the past month from the devastated guy that cried on my balcony after Tanya broke it off with him.

It took about a week for everything to sink if for him and he was pretty unbearable during that time but then one day he came over and he just pulled me into his arms and kissed the top of my head and thanked me. He thanked me for putting up with his grumpy ass and for being such a great friend to him.

His best friend.

So it's official I've slipped into best friend mode, another reason that I'm never going to stand a chance.

"Where are we going?" I ask him.

"You'll see in a minute," he replied with a grin.

I decide not to argue with him for a change so you can imagine my confusion when we pull up out the front of Cullen Law Firm.

"What are we doing here?" I ask. Is this seriously what he dragged me out of the apartment for?

"You'll see," he says as he comes around my side of the jeep and helps me out. He takes my hand then and leads me to the door. "Come on you're going to love it," he says with way too much self-assurance for my liking.

Instead of entering through the front doors we walk around the back and he hits the switch on a remote he had, which is obviously for the garage door, which is opening in front of me.

"I didn't realise this place had a garage," I say.

"No one does," he tells me as he begins leading me through the garage and towards a door. He opens it with a key and when he opens the door to enter I notice the stairs. Once we reach the top he opens yet another door but I don't say anything I'm too curious right now.

"Well here it is," he says once he walks through the door and steps aside for me to walk through too.

I look around at the empty space. "What it is?" I ask.

"An apartment," he answers, "well it will be anyway," he grins.

"Come on," he says and grabs my hand again and begins leading me around the apartment.

"So it's got three bedrooms, a kitchen," he explains, "and a bathroom, there's no bath but I've already talked to my dad and he said that we can knock out a cupboard and have a bath put in," he rambles on excitedly but I have to be honest and say I have no fucking clue what's going on.

"Um, its great Edward but what's this got to do with me?" I ask him.

"Well I thought we could live here," he says and all of a sudden the earlier self-assurance is gone and instead he's looking at me a little unsure.

"Us?" I question.

"Ethan, you and me," he answers my question.

"Um wow," I say I didn't see that coming, not in a million years.

"Well this place has three bedrooms and my dad said that if we pay for the renovations then we can live here rent free," he explains. "My parents own the building and mum doesn't need the space for the business so it's been unused until now"

My eyes widen at the comment, rent-free?

"You're kidding?"

"No. I figure some paint and bathroom renovations wouldn't be that expensive," he adds then.

"You're serious about this aren't you?" I ask then surprised. "You want us to move in here?"

"Yeah," he nods. "I mean think about it, Bella, it's kind of perfect. You want to move out of your parents and Ethan needs more space. I also want to move out of my parents place but I don't want to be too far away from Ethe. This way we get the best of both worlds. I can be a full time father, which would help you out more, and you can afford to move out and save the money you would have wasted on rent so you can go back to school."

My mouth opens in shock. He has really thought this out and the scary thing is he is making a lot of sense except for a few things. Firstly, I'm in love with him and he doesn't know that, and I don't know if I can live with him every day and not want it to be something more. Secondly, wouldn't it be awkward for him if he decided to start dating again?

"Bella?" he questions when I don't speak.

"Wow," I answer, "you've really thought about this."

"Yeah I have. I think it's a great idea," he replies.

"Are you sure? I mean you and me living together?" I question.

"It will be great," he grins. "We're best friends Bella and we have a son together."

"Yeah great," I reply absently as I look around. The place really is great. It's got a wooden floor, which just needs a coat of varnish and it's pretty big which means there will be plenty of room for Ethan for a while yet.

"So?" he asked.

"Do I have to decide now?" I frown.

"You don't like it?" he says sadly.

"No, I love it," I quickly assure him, "I'm just not sure about us living together," I admit.

"Why not?" he frowns.

I just look at him and I wonder how he can't see it, but I don't answer because if I tell him the truth everything will change between us and I'm not ready for that to happen.

"What about Tanya?" I blurt out instead.

He frowns at me then. "What about her?"

"Well what happens if she comes back and you're living with me?" I ramble. God am I stupid or what, why would I bring up the blonde bitch who should remain nameless.

"We're over Bella and who I'm living with is none of her business. I want to live with you and Ethan," he adds then.

"You do?" I smile.

"Yeah," he nods and smiled back.

"Ok," I find myself telling him.

"Ok?" he asks with a huge smile and wide eyes, I guess he didn't expect it to be easy when he brought me over here.

"Let's do it," I confirm.

Everything flew by after that. Edward lined up a contractor that his father recommended and a week later the bathroom had been refurbished and new built in wardrobes in each room.

I guess that's why I find myself walking the aisles of the furniture super store in Port Angeles whilst Edward and I try to pick out a lounge that we both like as well as other must have furniture.

My parents were a little worried when I told them my plans to move out with Edward but they're slowly coming around to the idea. I think they're just really going to miss having Ethan around all the time. Thankfully though my mother is still going to babysit Ethan through the days while I'm at work

"I like this one," Edward calls out to me and when I approach I find him standing in front of a chocolate brown lounge.

"It's nice," I agree. It's a three seater with a chase and you can buy a matching two seater to go with it.

We take a seat in it together and both moan at how comfy it feels. "This is sooo good," Edward says.

"Yeah I can see you coming home to this every day," I smirk.

Our gazes lock then and for the first time I see some hidden questions in Edward's eyes and I quickly avert my gaze. I take a look at the price tag then and am surprised that it's actually in our price range.

After a lot of arguments over money we finally came to an agreement on who would pay for what. I'm paying for the lounge, an entertainment unit, as well as my own new bed while Edward is buying a television, DVD entertainment system, as well as a bed for his room too.

"I think this is the one," I say standing up.

"Great," he agrees.

We head to the electrical section then and we notice the washers and driers. "I didn't even think about those but we're going to need them," I inform him.

"That's cool I've got money," he tells me.

Surprisingly money isn't the problem for either of us. I've been saving for the past four years and I also still have some of the money I saved during all my years at high school where I put my waitress money away for college.

Edward had a small amount of savings and now that he's working he's able to put some money away, but the real surprise came a fortnight ago when he received a cheque from Tanya for $5000. Apparently Edward had quite a lot of stuff in the apartment he shared with Tanya in New York. Although most people would have been happy to receive the money it was sad for Edward because it was just another reminder that he and Tanya were over. While he was trying to recover from a broken heart, Tanya was busy closing that chapter of her life that was Edward Cullen.

"How about we just go half?" I suggest.

Edward groans. "Bella, why won't you just let me spend the money? I don't want it," he tells me. I know what he means, he hates having the money that Tanya sent sitting in his bank it's a constant reminder to him that the life they once had is over.

"Ok," I finally relent.

"Ok?" he says shocked. I'm not surprised because I've argued with him about practically everything.

I smile one of my best teasing smiles at him. "Yes ok, by all means spend your money Cullen."

"I will," he frowns I don't think he understand what just happened.

It takes us another hour to finally pick the entertainment system and the unit, somehow we ended up with a wide screen TV, and after we pay for our purchases and make arrangements to have everything delivered we finally flee the store.

"That was exhausting," Edward complains as we get into my car. I refused to take the hour trip to Las Cruses in his jeep.

I laugh at him then. "That's just the start of it Edward. We still have to buy towels and sheets, not to mention the paint that we need so we can paint on the weekend. Oh and then there's the first grocery shop and all the cleaning products we'll need," I tease him.

"Oh God," he groans.

I continue to laugh at him as he pulls my car out onto the main road and heads in the direction of Forks.


	17. Chapter 17

**Hi everyone. I'm so overwhelmed with how many of you have found my story and are reading! Thank you so much, especially to those of you who are taking to the time to review. I am trying to reply to as many as I can but if I don't get to you please don't think it's not because I'm reading. A lot of you are logged in as guests too so unfortunately I can't get back to you if you're not registered.**

**Anyway on with the story. I hope you enjoy the new part. **

**Part 17**

_Edward POV_

Have I ever mentioned that I hate it when Bella is right? Well I do. Although I'm excited that Bella, Ethan and I are moving in together I'm totally over the whole renovating and moving process. For some reason Bella and I thought it would be fun to have Jasper, Alice and Rosalie over for a painting day but we won't be making that mistake again anytime soon. Even though Bella and I had already picked the colour scheme and were keeping it simple it was still a nightmare. Alice and Rosalie bickered and complained over the colours we chose and why they thought they were totally wrong.

Thankfully Bella wouldn't even hear their ideas for changes to brighten up the room and once all the furniture was delivered, much to my satisfaction, both Alice and Rosalie were eating their words.

So our apartment is all finished and today is moving day.

"God I hope you don't get sick of me because there is no way I'm moving again for like another five years," I groan as I fall into the couch beside Bella.

Bella laughs, "Hey, why are you complaining Cullen? You already had most of your stuff in boxers I had to pack and then unpack two bedrooms," Bella points out.

"Hey I helped," I reminder her. Actually I was probably more of a hindrance than a help. "Who knew that a two year old could have so much stuff," I mumble.

"I think it's doubled since your family found out about him," Bella smirks. She's right. Rosalie and my mother are sending my father broke with the amount of things they buy Ethan.

I lean forward and grab a slice of the pizza from the coffee table whilst I look around at our apartment. It looks pretty good, and it feels pretty good. Tonight it's just Bella and I since my parents offered to take Ethan so that we could move in so tomorrow after we get his room all set up Bella and I are going to pick him up and bring him here. Neither of us can wait. Jasper helped us paint some really great murals on the wall and we purchased him a toy box for all his toys.

"I'm going to be so exhausted on Monday," Bella sighs.

Monday is Bella's first day of work at the law firm. I know she's excited and nervous.

"You could probably start on Tuesday instead, my mum wouldn't mind," I point out. I know she'll refuse though because she doesn't want anyone at the firm to think that she doesn't deserve the job, she intends on proving to everyone at Cullen that she is more than capable and mum and I have no doubt that she will. Bella is a wonderful woman.

"What?" she asks obviously noticing that I've been staring at her. "Do I have something on my face?" she asks as she starts rubbing her face.

"No," I chuckle feeling embarrassed that she caught me staring.

"Then what?"

"Nothing," I smile, "it's nothing," I add.

The next day, when we finally have everything unpacked, we pick up Ethan and drive him to our new home.

"Where dis?" he asks.

"This is our new home," Bella tells him.

We watch as he looks around the apartment in confusion. "Where nanny and poppy?" he asks.

"Well nanny and poppy are at their place they won't be living with us anymore," Bella explains.

I watch as his lower lip starts to quiver then, "Why?" he asks.

"Well because we're going to live with daddy now," Bella replies.

I sigh in relief the minute I see his little lip stop quivering and he looks at me with interest, "Weally?" he asks.

"Yep," I grin at him, "And guess what?" I ask him.

"What?" he asks in excitement.

"You have a new room," I grin.

His little eyes light up and he starts looking around, "Where?"

"Come on," Bella laughs at him and leads him over to his room, which is next to hers.

I stand back and watch in delight, knowing that every aching muscle is worth it when I hear my son squeal in excitement over his new room.

"Look," he yells rushing over to the toy box, "Look mama!"

"I know honey," Bella grins and if I'm not mistaken I swear I can see a few tears in her eyes.

I walk up and stand beside her, unable to resist putting an arm around her and pulling her close to me.

"Look dada," Ethan cries out when he sees the car mat we got for him in the middle of the room.

"You like it?" I ask him. His little eager nod is enough for us and I know without a doubt that everything we have been through, including the heartbreak over losing Tanya is worth it to see my son so happy.

Every smile from my son, every 'I love you' goes a long way to healing my heart and filling the empty space in my heart.

The next morning I'm up early for work. I work most mornings and attend uni in the afternoons. I'm heading to kitchen needing my morning my coffee but I stop short at the sight that greats me.

"Is it good?" Bella asks our son with a grin as she dips her finger in his breakfast and licks her finger in what is the most seductive way I've ever seen. It's nothing different from what I've seen her do a thousand times since coming into hers and Ethan's life, but this morning it had me readjusting myself.

"You ok?" Bella asks me.

"Um yeah," I reply with a smile. Of course she would ask that. I'm standing in the middle of the kitchen looking like an idiot while I ogle her. And what an ogle it is. She's already dressed for work in a tight short skirt, it's completely respectable but on Bella is looks sexy as hell, and it's topped off by a blood red satin blouse which is unbuttoned dangerously low.

"You look great," I tell her and I curse under my breath when I hear the husky sound of my voice.

"Thanks," she smiles shyly.

"Morning Ethe," I say then as I lean down to kiss my son good morning.

"Morning Dada," he grins.

I lean in and kiss Bella's cheek then dangerously close to the side of her mouth. I don't know what's come over me but I have to pull myself together, get my hormones in check.

"Morning," I greet her with a smile.

"Morning," she replies back, her shock evident on her face.

"Are you almost done there honey?" she asks Ethan then and he nods his little face.

"Ok then let's get you ready for Nana," she tells him.

"I'll take him if you like?" I offer then.

Bella looks surprised. "You sure?"

"Yep it's your first day take the extra time," I tell her.

"Ok," she grins, "thank you."

Thirty minutes later I'm in the car with Ethan on the way to the Swans. Renee is surprised when I walk in with Ethan on my hip and his bag of things over my shoulder.

"Edward!" she smiles.

"Hi Renee," I reply. I really like Renee Swan; she reminds me a lot of Bella to tell you the truth.

"Hey honey," she grins at Ethan. "You going to spend the day with Nanna?" she asks.

I watch him nod and I smile. "Ok little man Daddy has to go but I'll see you tonight," I tell him.

I hand him to Renee then. "Just place that over there," she tells me, referring to his bag.

I head back over and give Ethan a kiss then, it's so hard leaving him like this. Because I haven't lived with him before this is the first time I've had to drop him off.

"Be good for Nanna," I tell him.

"Ok," he nods.

"Ok then by Ethe, by Renee," I say.

"By dada," Ethan calls out as I head to the door and I turn back and wave one last time before leaving.

Once I reach the office I pick up my coffee cup along with the brand new one I picked up for Bella as a happy first day present and head to the coffee area.

"Hi Mum," I greet as I approach the kitchen and find my mother making herself a cup.

"Hi honey," she replies leaning up to give me a kiss.

She gives the two cups in my hands a quizzical look but doesn't say anything.

"I'll see you later," she says when she finishes making her cup of coffee.

"Yep," I smile.

Once I've made the cups of coffees I head past Bella's desk on my way back to my office. I see her reading through some things before she looks back to the computer screen.

"How's it going?" I ask.

She looks up and smiles. "Hey."

I place her coffee cup on the desk then. "What's this?" she smiles.

"Your new coffee cup," I smile proudly.

"Thank you," she says.

"You're very welcome," I tell her. "So how's it going?" I ask as I take my first sip of coffee.

"Edward, I've only been here 10 minutes," she scoffs.

"I know," I say, "but did someone show you around?" I ask worried.

"Actually your mother is training me," she informs me and like she knew she was being talked about, my mother appears and sits back down next to Bella.

"Was Ethan ok?" she asks then.

"He was fine," I tell her. "I'll see you later," I grin then.

"Ok," she nods.

"Lunch?" I ask as I back away towards my office.

"Ok," she agrees with a smile.

I turn and head back to my office and am almost through the door when I realise we didn't agree on a time. I'm about to head back out there but I notice that she's totally engrossed with something that my mum is showing her and I don't want to interrupt.

"So how's your first day so far?" I ask her as we sit across from each other at the Diner.

"Good," she smiles. "Nothing too hard so far and your mother is great," she says and she looks so happy. I'm so glad that she likes the job.

After finally deciding on what time to head to lunch we decided to come to the Diner and grab some takeaway before heading over to see Ethan. Bella isn't used to being away from Ethan all day. Even when she worked at the Diner her mother or Alice usually brought him by at some point.

"Hi sweetie," Charlie greets when we walk through the door; he leans in and gives her a kiss. "Hi Edward," he smiled.

"Hi daddy," Bella replied.

"Hi Charlie," I say

"Where are mum and Ethe?" Bella asks.

"Just upstairs," he informs us.

"Oh, okay we might take our food up there," Bella informs him.

"You sure that's a good idea?" Charlie asks.

"Why?" Bella asks.

"Well he needs to get used to not seeing you Bella," he informs her.

"Why?" she frowns and I can tell she's concerned now.

"He was a little upset this morning when your mum took him over to the diner to check in and realised you weren't here," he sighs.

"Why didn't you call me?" Bella asks.

"Relax Bella," I encourage reaching over the table and grasping her hand. "Your dad's right," I tell her.

"It's just been a lot of change for him sweetie," Charlie continues, "first his room was all different and then his toys weren't where he left them. I just think its better that he doesn't see you right now or otherwise he'll get used to it and when you don't come one day he'll get upset again."

"Ok," she whispers in reluctant agreement but I can tell it's killing her.

"Why don't you ring him when you get back to work," I suggest.

She smiles then. "That's a good idea," she tells me. "He'll like that."

All through lunch after that Bella was kind of antsy. I can't blame her. I hated the fact that out son was upstairs and we couldn't just go up and see him but I understood where Charlie was coming from and I know Bella did too after she thought about it.

Now Bella and I have to concentrate on getting Ethan into a new schedule, one that doesn't include seeing us all the time. I know it's going to be tough but in the end it will be for the best.

_Bella POV _

I've been working at the firm for over a month now and I've settled into a comfortable routine. Thankfully Ethan settled down and is now used to, and even looking forward to the days he spends with my mum and Esme, which is a big help.

Edward and I have also settled into a comfortable routine living together. We share the cooking and cleaning most nights before settling on the lounge together after putting Ethan to bed. We feel like a real family and it's kind of scary.

"Hey babe I'm off to uni so I'll see you tonight," Edward says as he breezes over to my desk. He leans down and kisses my lips quickly before flashing me a last smile before he leaves.

Weird? I know.

Since the kiss in the kitchen a few weeks ago it's become a regular thing. He greets me in the morning with a kiss, when he leaves and when he says good night. I won't lie and say I don't like it I'm just a little confused by it.

I look up and notice that Esme Cullen saw it as well and is probably wondering what the hell is going on too.

So anyway I've decided I'm not going to over think it. I finally decided that it was just Edward's way of being friendly so now I'm going to do the same thing.

_Edward POV _

I sigh in relief as I make it home. I had a killer exam this afternoon and I'm glad that it's over. When I walk into the apartment Ethan and Bella are already seated at the table and eating.

"Hey," I greet them both.

"Hi," Bella smiled.

"Dada," Ethan grins. He has spaghetti sauce all over his face so I kiss his little forehead before leaning in and kissing Bella on the side of her mouth.

"Sorry but we got hungry," she explained.

"That's fine," I tell her.

"Your plate is in the oven."

"Thank you," I grin as I pull it out and join them at the table. I'm starving because I was too nervous to eat before the test.

I dig into my food straight away but I must be making a pig of myself because when I look up Bella is staring at me with a little smile.

"What?" I ask her.

"You hungry?" she asks.

I nod and shove another forkful into my mouth. I love her spaghetti.

"How was the exam?" she asks.

"Good," I nod sipping on a glass of water. "Glad it's over."

After dinner I clean up the kitchen while Bella baths Ethan. He must have had a busy day with Renee because he's out like a light not long after.

"That was quick," I say to Bella from my spot on the couch.

"Yeah he was tired," she nods.

"Come sit with me," I ask then holding out my hand for her and when she takes it I pull her onto the lounge next to me before wrapping my arm around her.

I'm not really sure what I'm doing but lately things between Bella and I are changing. It scares the shit out of me but at the same time I'm also really excited. All the things I used to feel for Bella are coming back to the surface except that now neither of us are teenagers.

"What do you want to watch?" I ask her.

"Hmm don't care," she says as she snuggles into my shoulder.

I'm not sure what she thinks about all this. Sometimes I see her looking at me with questions in her eyes but other times she just smiles and accepts me and everything I offer her.

I think it's possible I might be falling in love with my best friend.

The first time I kissed her I didn't know where it came from but I did it anyway and it felt right in a way that a lot of other things in my life haven't so I've been doing it ever since.

"You want some popcorn?" I ask her.

I hear her giggle. "You can't possibly still be hungry after everything you just ate?" she asks.

"A little," I admit with a boyish smile.

She shakes her head. "No thanks I'll just pick at yours."

"Will you now?" I ask.

"Uh huh," she smirks.

I can't help myself then and I lean forward and kiss her lips. "Ok maybe," I tell her when I pull back.

"Maybe?" she asks me and I swear her voice almost sounds husky.

"Yeah if you're nice I'll let you," I tease.

"I'm always nice Cullen," she replies.

"Yeah you are," I laugh before leaning in and kissing her again. This time though Bella is the one that surprises me. I'm just about to pull back when I feel her tongue slide against my lower lip and I instantly open up. I slide my tongue out quickly to meet hers and they flick against each other a few times before I pull back.

"You want a drink?" I ask then. I know I should feel weird or even ask questions about what's going on between us but it just feels so natural.

"Yes please," she smiles at me so I finally stand up and head to the kitchen.

The next night when I come home I find Bella sitting at the table with Rosalie.

"Hey," I greet them both kissing my sisters cheek before pecking Bella's lips.

"Hey," hey both reply.

"How are you Rose?" I ask her. Even though she lives in Forks now I don't see her often. Bella has lunch with her occasionally but I never seem to find the time.

"Ok," she shrugs.

I notice that she seems really down. "You two should go out tonight," I suggest. It's a Friday night and neither of them have to work or go to class tomorrow.

I watch as Rosalie's eyes light up. "Oh that's a great idea what do you think?" she asks Bella.

I see Bella smile at the idea before she turns to me. "What about Ethan?"

"Bella I'll be here," I chuckle at her. It's taken her a while to get used to the fact that she's no longer a single parent.

"You don't mind?" she asks a hint of excitement in her voice.

"Not at all. In fact why don't you call Alice too, maybe Jasper can come over here and we can watch the game," I suggest.

"That's a great idea," Rosalie squeals. "I'll go call her," she informs us, pulling her cell out of her purse and walking into the living room.

Bella stands up and walks over to me. "That was really nice of you. She's a little down."

"It's fine. Besides you deserve a night off too," I tell her.

"Well thank you," she says again but this time she leans up on her tip toes and kisses me. She's about to pull back when I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her back to me deepening the kiss like the night before. I haven't been able to stop thinking about that kiss all day and every kiss since then I've been aching to slip in my tongue and taste her.

I don't go overboard though because I can hear Rosalie in the living room talking excitedly on the phone to Alice.

"Besides," I whisper when I pull back, "there are conditions," I tell her.

"Yeah?" she asks breathlessly.

"Uh huh," I inform her.

"Which are?"

"You have to let me take you to dinner and a movie tomorrow night," I tell her. It wasn't planned but it's something I've been thinking about all week.

"I'd love too," she grins at me shyly.

"Great I'll organise a sitter," I reply.

"A sitter?" Rosalie asks as she walks in. "What for?"

"Oh tomorrow night," I reply taking a step back from Bella as discreetly as possible.

"Oh I'll do it," she says. "I hardly ever get time with the little guy," she smiles.

"All night?" I ask.

"Yeah it'll be great," she grins. "I'll have him at mum and dad's place."

"Thanks Rosalie," Bella smiles.

"No problem and tonight is a go, Alice will be here in a half an hour with Jasper so we can all get ready so I'll just duck home and get my stuff," she rambles excitedly.

"Sounds great," Bella smiles at her.

Rosalie leaves seconds later and the minute she's gone I'm pulling Bella back into my arms. This time I give myself over to everything I'm feeling, fisting my hand in her hair as I drink from her mouth. I feel her hands in my hair and rubbing up and down my back as she gives me back just as much and when we pull apart we're both panting. That was the single best kiss of my life.

"Wow," I mumble.

"Uh huh," she nods dumbly. "I haven't' been kissed like that in… well in forever," she mumbles and I smile proudly.

"Just remember that when you go out tonight," I whisper in her ear before walking around her and into the living room to find my son.


	18. Chapter 18

**Part 18**

_Bella POV_

I forgot how long it can take you to get ready when you go out with the 'girls' but god does it feel good.

Rosalie, Alice, and I are now seated in a quiet bar as we sip on cocktails. I haven't had a cocktail in a long time so I mentally remind myself not to drink too much, especially now I have something to look forward to tomorrow.

"So you and my brother looked cosy this afternoon," Rosalie smirks at me. I know she's been waiting to bring it up since she walked in on us this afternoon. I know I'm blushing.

"You know," I shrug.

"No I don't," Alice speaks up, "are you holding out on us?" she asks.

"No," I smile, "but I think he asked me out on a date," I tell them.

"What do you mean you think?" Rosalie asks. I can tell that they are going to want the full details of what happened and then they're going to analyse every word.

"Well," I smirk, "after he kissed me," I blush. "He asked could he take me to a movie and dinner tomorrow night."

I watch both their eyes light up. "He kissed you?" they squeal.

"Actually he kisses me all the time but last night I slipped him some tongue and now he's devouring me," I grin.

"You go girl," Alice says high fiving me.

"I'm so happy for you, Bella," Rosalie says.

I take a deep breath. "I mean it might be nothing but god I hope it's something," I admit before letting go of a nervous giggle.

"You really like him?" Rosalie asks.

"Yeah," I nod. "I have for a long time but this time I'm going to try not to stuff it up."

"Bella," Alice sighs. I know she's about to go into her pep talk about how the past is the past and I have to let it go.

"Don't," I tell her. "We're here to have fun tonight so girls what are we doing in this dinky little place lets go let our hair out and dance," I say.

They both squeal in delight and a few minutes later we're on our way to Port Angeles only nightclub.

"How was it?" I hear his voice ask as I try to sneak into the apartment hours later.

"Where are you?" I giggle feeling just a little bit tipsy.

I hear him chuckle before he sits up on the lounge. "Sounds like you had a good time."

"I did but I'm not drunk," I tell him.

I wobble a little as I make my way over to him. "Ok maybe just a little," I giggle.

"Come on," he chuckles. "I'll help you to bed."

"Ooh," I purr, "I would go out and get drunk more often if it means getting some much needed assistance into bed," I giggle.

Once he helps me to my room I can finally see him and my mouth falls open when I realise he isn't wearing a shirt and I have a wonderful view of his toned chest.

"You like something you see?" he asks me.

"Uh huh," I nod.

He chuckles at me then before he leans in and kisses me quickly. "Night babe."

"Hey what was that?" I complain. "That was certainly not a good night kiss," I pout.

He steps closer to me again, so close I can smell him and God he smells good. "I think I'm spoiling you," he says.

"No," I shake my head and lean up for another kiss. "You're not spoiling me enough," I tell him.

He doesn't disappoint me he leans in and kisses me like I've been longing him too.

"Edward," I moan against his mouth as his tongue glides along my bottom lip. One of his hands is pulling at the pins in my hair to free it whilst the other is rubbing my bare back.

"You looked so sexy tonight," he tells me. "Sexy and beautiful," he adds.

I pull him closer after that comment; I never want to let him go. He feels so good against me, I forgot how perfect it felt, but I won't forget again.

He continues to plunder my mouth while his hand moves its way around the front of my body and just when I think he's going to cup my aching breast we hear Ethan's little voice over the baby monitor.

We pull back from the kiss but don't move away from each other, our foreheads are resting against each other as we breathe heavily.

"I'll go," he whispers and I can only nod. I'm too shocked to speak, too happy.

He steps away then before reaching for the baby monitor. "I'll keep this with me tonight too," he adds.

"Thank you," I whisper.

"Night babe," he smirks then.

"Night," I reply dreamily.

_Edward POV _

When I wake up the next morning it's to a quiet house. Normally Bella and Ethan would be up before me but I guess Bella's late night has kept her in bed but I wonder why my son hasn't tried to wake me up.

I climb out of bed and go in search for him but when I reach his room I find his little bed empty, which concerns me slightly. I head to Bella's next and I grin at the sight that greets me when I open the door. Ethan is curled up next to a snoring Bella and they both look so peaceful.

I feel my heart swell with pride and love right then. That's my family on that bed and right then I know I wouldn't change it for the world. I close the door quietly not wanting to wake them and make my way into the kitchen. The fridge is stocked thanks to Bella and I pull out all the necessary ingredients to make her favourite breakfast.

A half an hour later I am weighed down with a tray of food and orange juice as I make my way back into Bella's bedroom. Both Bella and Ethan are still sleeping but when I place the tray down Ethan begins to stir.

"Dada?" he asks.

"Yeah mate it's me," I tell him ruffling his hair.

"Mornin'," he says sleepily.

"Morning little man," I smile back.

I see him eye the tray then, "What's dat?"

"Breakfast," I tell him.

"Ooh breakfast in bed," he squeals in excitement and his squeals are enough to stir Bella from sleep.

"Ethan?" she mumbles.

I walk over and sit on the side of the bed and lean down to kiss her forehead "Morning," I whisper.

I watch as a smile covers her face as she slowly opens her eyes to meet mine. Did I mention that Bella has the most beautiful brown eyes? Well she does, they dance with excitement this morning. "Morning," she whispers.

"Mama, Dada made breakfast in bed," Ethan tells her.

Bella chuckles at our son. "So I heard"

She looks at me then. "You hungry?" I ask her.

"Yep," she answers before sitting up. I take the other side of the bed and place the tray in between us, which just happens to be in front of Ethan.

"Wow this looks great Edward," Bella smiles.

"Thank you," I grin.

"Hmm I love pancakes," Ethan informs me and I chuckle because I know he does. He takes after Bella in the food department. He likes it sweet so I know they'll both be eating them with cream and strawberries this morning.

"That was positively delicious," Bella sighs when she finishes. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," I say. I want to do these types of things for her and Ethan all of the time, God knows they both of them deserve it.

Ethan runs off to his room to play then and I move the tray aside and lay closer to Bella. "Are you feeling ok?" I ask.

"Yeah surprisingly," she chuckles.

"Good," I nod. "So we're still going out tonight?" I ask.

After Bella left last night I talked to Jasper about where I should take her.

"What's the big deal?" Jasper asked as he watched me flick through the phone book looking for a great place to take Bella. "I mean it's just dinner and a movie right? You guys do it all the time."

"No, we don't do that sort of thing all the time," I point out. "I mean sure we go to dinner occasionally or a movie but that was different before."

"Why?" he asks.

"Well for starters before I was dating Tanya and now I'm not and I also wasn't interested in it being anything more," I explain.

"And you are now?" he asks.

I open my mouth and I know instinctively what I'm going to say, I don't even have to think about it and that's weird. "Yeah I do," I smile. I really do. I want Bella and me to be something more. I'm not sure when I decided it but I know I'm not frightened by the idea at all, I'm excited.

Jasper smirks at me. "It's about time," he says.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask a little offended.

"Well Bella has been in love with you for as long as I can remember," he scoffed.

"She has not," I laugh. The idea that Bella has had feelings for me and that I didn't notice is absolutely ridiculous. Bella is my best friend and she was totally supportive over the whole Tanya thing.

But when Jasper gives me that pointed look I know then that I've been walking around with blinders on. "She has?"

"Afraid so mate and you've just been too blind to see it."

"In high school?" I ask then both anxious and afraid of the answer. Anxious because it would make my day to hear that my night with Bella meant as much to her as it did to me, but also afraid of all the time I've wasted when I could have been with her.

Jasper nodded. "Yep, so Alice says."

In the end I booked at this small restaurant just out of town that my dad takes my mum too and I hope Bella is going to like it.

"Yeah if you still want too," Bella answers my questions normally.

"I do," I assure her. "I'm looking forward to it," I admit as I reach over and brush some hair out of her face.

"Me too," she smiles.

As I lie there and watch her smile at me I feel my excitement building. I can't wait for tonight because I have the feeling it's the start of something really good for the two of us.

_Edward POV _

I swear my mouth is hitting the floor right now that's how shocked I am. I knew Bella Swan was beautiful but as she stands in front of me, ready to leave for our date, beautiful doesn't even cover how she looks.

"Edward are you ok?" she asks and I can immediately tell by the sound of her voice that the way I'm acting is making her nervous and unsure.

"Um yeah. You look spectacular," I finally get my mouth working enough to tell her.

Her face lights up the room with a smile and I find myself grinning back. Tonight she is wearing a little black dress. The dress itself isn't over dressy it's just the way Bella wears it with her long flowing hair and her tanned skin.

"Are you ready to go?" I ask her then.

Ethan is already over at my parents with Rosalie; I dropped him there earlier and then came back for Bella. I'm glad too because I wouldn't want my son to see me staring at his mother like she's my next meal but right now I'm contemplating eating dessert right off her.

"Yep," she smiles.

It takes about twenty minutes to get to the restaurant and I can tell straight away that Bella likes the place I've chosen.

"My dad brings my mum here all the time. They love it," I inform her as we take our seat.

"I didn't even know it was here," she smiles at me.

The restaurant is small but in the corner there is a pianist and there is a small amount of room to dance so after dinner I stand up and ask Bella if she'd like to.

When I pull Bella into my arms my first thought is how right she feels. I've never danced with Bella before but she immediately melts against me, something that never happened with Tanya even in all the years we were together. She hated dancing.

I run my hand up and down Bella's back unaware that with every stroke I cover more territory.

"Edward," I hear Bella whisper, and it almost sounds like a moan.

When I look down she's staring up at me. "Yeah?" I ask, just as quietly as her question. I'm aware that there are people staring at us as we dance but I don't mind at all.

"What's happening between us?" she asks me biting on her lower lip nervously and totally unaware that it drives me crazy.

There are many ways I could answer her question but for some reason I choose the safest. "What do you want to happen?" I ask as I reach a hand up to caress her cheek softly.

"I think you know," she whispers. I do because it's exactly what I want.

I decide not to answer her questions with words because they're not needed right now, instead I lean in and slowly kiss her. This kiss is different from the rest. It's not quick or fleeting. It's not hard and passionate. It's gentle and sincere and as far as I'm concerned it says more than any words can.

When we pull apart we're both panting slightly. "Are you ready to go?" I ask her.

When she nods I reluctantly release her and she returns to the table to grab her purse while I pay for dinner.

_Bella POV _

Once we reach the car I start to feel nervous but when Edward looks over and smiles as me I feel it all disappear.

"Do you want to see a movie?" he asks me.

I shake my head. "Not tonight," I reply.

"What about some ice cream?" he asks me.

I bite my lip nervously as I contemplate how to answer his question. "I thought we could just go home," I whisper.

"Home?" he asks and he looks a little disappointed and I'm sure he's wondering what he's done for me to not want to continue our date.

I reach over and place my hand over his on the gear stick as I look down. "Yeah I thought we could spend some time together, alone," I try to explain.

I lift my head after a few seconds of silence and find Edward staring at me with something akin to desire in his eyes and my breath catches.

"Alone?" he asks.

All I can do at this very moment is nod. My voice betrays me.

"Ok," Edward finally says and then turns his attention to getting us home.

The whole trip we're both quiet. I'm thinking about what's going to happen once we get there and I assume Edward is too. At least I am semi prepared for this. I might not have had sex in over three years but I am wearing underwear appropriate for it.

Once we're inside I walk straight to the kitchen and open the freezer to pull out the tub of chocolate ice cream I have in there. Its Edward's favourite. I pick up two spoons and head in towards the couch, hoping that the ice cream will serve as some kind of icebreaker for us.

"I have ice cream," I smile as I approach.

Edward looks up and smiles. "Ooh my favourite," he says.

It's funny all the little things you learn about people when you live with them. I know that Edward loves chocolate ice cream and that like me he can't make it through the morning without coffee.

I hand him a spoon and sit closely next to him, our sides are pressed together, and when Edward lifts an arm and wraps it around my shoulder I sink further against him.

"Hmm this is good," he moans as he takes his first bite.

I help myself to a spoonful and have to agree, "You're right"

We're through half the tub when Edward looks down at me and laughs.

"What?" I ask.

"You have ice cream all over your face," he grins.

"I do?" I ask with wide eyes. How embarrassing.

Taking the ice cream out of my hands Edward places it and our spoons on the coffee table. He doesn't say a word as he leans in and starts kissing the side of my mouth, his tongue licking at the chocolate left behind.

"Yum," he whispers in my ear.

I shiver at his words and actions. Edward continues to kiss and lick the sides of my mouth then until it finally covers mine and his tongue slides into my mouth. I find myself instantly responding. He tastes so good and his kisses are intoxicating.

I fist his shirt as I try to get closer to him and soon I find myself being lowered onto the couch with Edward looming above me. Our mouths continue to feast off each other and Edward's hands starts wandering up my body in a way they haven't in years. I ache for his touch and I shamelessly arch into every stroke of his body.

Edward's kisses move down my throat as his hand finally comes to rest of my breast.

"Edward," I moan out.

His mouth reaches my collarbone and then moves lower to kiss the top of my cleavage revealed by the dress I'm wearing. I arch up and my hips rub pleasurably against the hard bulge in Edward's dress pants.

"God Bella," he growls pressing his forehead against my chest in what I presume in a move to try and get himself under control. The problem is I don't want him in control. I want him to let go and love my body with abandonment.

"Don't stop," I whisper huskily.

Edward looks up at me and I can see clearly the surprise in his eyes by my words. "No?" he asks.

I shake my head. But a second later I feel my stomach drop when Edward pulls back even further and moves completely off me to stand up. I want to crawl into a hole and die. Obviously I was stupid enough to believe that he might want to be with me but I was very wrong.

_[I]Edward POV [/I]_

I don't believe my ears when Bella pleads with me not to stop. I don't intend on it, especially if she doesn't want me too. I pull back and get to my feet. The last thing I want to do is take Bella on our couch.

I hold out my hand to her but when I look down I find she's lot even looking at me. Her head is down and I can see her shoulders shaking slightly.

"Baby?" I whisper.

She doesn't look up. "Bella what's wrong?" I ask her.

"It's fine Edward. If you don't want to be with me you just have to say so," she says.

"What?" I ask. Where on earth did she get the idea I didn't want to be with her? Just seconds ago I was grinding my very obvious arousal into her.

I realise me error then. When I jumped off her after she pleaded with me not to stop she thought I was rejecting her.

I need to take immediate action to fix this so I bend down and easily pick up her into my arms.

"Edward!" she squeals "Put me down," she protests.

"Nope," I grin as I make my way to my room.

Once I reach my bed I let her feet go and allow her to slide to the floor. Bella is looking around in confusion so I take the opportunity to kick off my shoes while she does.

"Wha.." I don't let her even get a word out before I'm kissing her. I snake my tongue into her mouth and tease hers until she responds.

"Let me make love to you?" I whisper when I pull back.

Bella's eyes go wide but she nods eagerly and I just smile.

"Let me just use the bathroom," she says then and even though I don't want her out of my sight or arms at the moment I let her go.

As soon as she's gone I rush to my side drawer and double-check my condom supplies. I haven't needed them in a while. Once I'm sure there's enough to get us through the night if we need I pull out a few candles I have and light them before dimming the lights.

I take a seat as I continue to wait for Bella. The longer I wait the more nervous I'm starting to feel. I'm so caught up with trying to get myself under control I don't notice that Bella has walked back into the room and she has to clear her throat to get my attention.

The minute I look up my jaw drops. Standing before me is a goddess. With her black dress gone Bella is standing before me dressed in only black lingerie and every inch of her is perfect. 

"Bella," I choke out.

I watch her tuck her hair behind her ear nervously and I smile. This beautiful, sexy woman in front of me is nothing like the confident girl I lost my virginity to so many years ago and I find it completely breathtaking.

I hold my hand out to her and she takes it so that I can pull her closer until she's standing in between my parted legs.

"You're so beautiful," I whisper as I breathe her in, my eyes trailing every bit of skin.

"And you're over dressed," she smirks.


	19. Chapter 19

**Part 19**

_Bella POV_

The first thing I notice when I open my eyes is that I'm not in my room and then I remember why and where I am.

I turn on my side and find Edward sleeping next to me peacefully and I smile. Last night was the most amazing night of my life. Edward Cullen and I made love again and it was everything I dreamed it would be.

Sometimes I thought that I had spent so much time reminiscing over our night together that I had built it into something that it wasn't. That the next man I slept with afterwards would never be able to compare but I was wrong. Because the second time around with Edward was better than any memory I had, or anything that I could conjure up in my mind.

I feel Edward stir beside me and I wait in trepidation for how he'll react. Deep down I'm scared that he'll tell me that last night was a mistake and the truth is I don't know how I'll handle it if he does. It's taken a lot to get past the mistakes of the past and be able to feel like I can possibly move forward with Edward. It's helped that he's been the one making all the moves.

I'm startled out of my thoughts when I feel Edward's hand reach out for me. "There you are," he says pulling me back to his side and I sigh in relief.

"How long have you been awake?" he asks me.

"Not long," I reply.

"Come here," he whispers and pulls me so I'm lying on top of him with my head on his chest. I feel his hand run through my hair and I sigh and close my eyes.

"What are you thinking about?" he asks.

I open my eyes and turn my head slightly so I can see him. "Nothing," I lie.

"You sure?" he asks. "You seemed like you were a million miles away before."

'I was' I think silently. "You're not having second thoughts about last night are you?" he whispers then.

"What? No!" I quickly assure him. "It was absolutely amazing," I admit. "I guess I was a little worried that you might be having second thoughts."

I see him nod his head in understanding.

"I'm not," he finally whispers.

His hand reaches up and buries itself in my hair then and he brings my mouth down to meet his. He thrusts his tongue into my mouth and quickly seeks out mine. I instantly respond and feel myself becoming immediately aroused.

"Let me show you exactly where my second thoughts are," Edward whispers huskily when he pulls back.

His hands go to my hips and he encourages me to sit up and when I do he immediately begins to stroke me.

"God Edward," I moan.

"Raise up baby," he whispers and I immediately do as he asks.

I feel the tip of his cock rub against me teasingly and I moan out in delight before I begin to lower myself onto him.

"Yes!" Edward hisses.

"Ahh," I cry out. I feel so full with him inside of me.

"God you're so tight Bella," he groans to my surprise. "You feel so good," he adds as he rocks his hips against me.

"Oh Edward," I moan out as I begin to pump up and down on him faster.

A few minutes later I feel my release upon me, and Edward obviously realises this also because his hands go to my hips and he helps me sink down on him over and over again.

"Oh Edward…. ahh YES!" I cry out as my walls clamp around him and I fall over the edge.

"God Bella," Edward cries out as he continues to pump in and out of me. "Yes… ahh yes, BELLA!"

I fall against Edward's chest completely exhausted. Being with Edward is so amazing and I don't have words to express how he makes me feel. I know I'm in love with Edward and I want to tell him but I also realise that Edward isn't ready for me to confess my love for him quite yet.

I feel his lips on the top of my head and I smile. "Hmm that was amazing," I tell him.

"It sure was," he agrees, "and I hope it put all those thoughts you had about me regretting what happened between us to rest," he adds.

I smile against his chest. "I guess I just found it hard to believe that we're really here like this," I tell him.

"Why?" he asks and I can hear the surprise in his voice by my comment. I would have thought it would be obvious why I thought that though.

"Well because of everything that has happened, I didn't think you would ever be able to move past it," I tell him.

He stays quiet after that and I take the opportunity to continue. I want to explain my comment to him.

"I guess I see myself as the very reason why you lost everything that you wanted for your life," I whisper. "And now because of me you're settling for second best," I add.

"Bella," I hear Edward whisper before his hands lift us both up until he's sitting and I'm straddling his lap. We're face to face and I can no longer hide from him. Normally our position would seem completely sexual but right now it's anything but, it's intimate.

"Look at me please?" he asks me and reaches to bring my face in line with his.

"I'll admit that this isn't where I planned to be 12 months ago but that doesn't mean that I don't want to be here, Bella," he says. "Today, in this very moment, with you and Ethan I am happier than I ever remember being," he tells me and I can see the corner of his mouth lifting up in a small smile.

"Really?" I ask, chewing on my lower lip.

"Bella, if I could go back and change what happened between us I would," he tells me and as soon as the words leave his mouth I drop my head wanting to hide the tears I know will fall from him.

"Hey look me?" he says again raising my chin.

"I would change the situation, not the night. I wouldn't give back Ethan in a million years. He has changed me and my life so profoundly."

"What would you change?" Bella asked.

"Well firstly I would find the guts to tell you how I really felt about you back then, that being with you was a dream come true for me and once I had you I probably wouldn't have ever wanted to let you go," he smiles at me.

"But you were with Tanya," I point out.

"I was," he nods.

"That's why you think the night was a mistake," I sigh. It still hurts to think back on when he called the night we conceived our son a mistake.

"Bella, it was a mistake because what I did to Tanya was wrong," he says. "But I wouldn't take it back," he adds then.

"Good because that night meant a lot to me," I whisper truthfully.

I watch as smile graces Edward's beautiful face and I smile back.

"Bella can I ask you something?"

I nod.

"Feel free to call me an asshole but I guess it's something I've always wondered," he tells me.

"Ok."

"Did you like me back then?" he asks nervously.

"Yeah I did. I liked you a lot I just didn't think I stood a chance with you," I admit. "When I saw you at the party that night without Tanya I couldn't believe it. I'd already had a couple of drinks and Mike was trying to get back together with me but when I saw you I knew."

"Knew what?" he asked.

"Knew that it was probably my last chance to show you how I felt. I guess I stuffed it up pretty badly hey?" I laugh bitterly.

Edward shakes his head at me. "God Bella, that night was amazing. I mean I'd liked you for such a long time but you never ever looked twice at me if I'd known…"

"Would it have changed anything, Edward?" I ask sadly. "I'm not stupid I know what people used to say about me, would you really have been interested in slutty Bella Swan?"

"Don't call yourself that," he says sternly.

"I'm not you know," I tell him then.

"Of course you're not," he smiles.

"No," I shake my head. "I mean it was all lies all those things they all used to say about me. I've only ever slept with two people Edward."

"What?" he says shocked.

I feel completely ashamed when I realise that Edward Cullen thought the same thing about me that everyone else did in school.

"Wow mud sticks doesn't it," I cry.

"Oh god, Bella I had no idea," he tells me. "But it didn't matter for me," he tells me. "I still thought you were beautiful and I still spent every penny I earned eating at the Diner so I could see you, talk to you," he smiles at me.

I find myself smiling back at his sweet words and for a second I allow myself to wonder how differently things might have turned out if Edward or I had worked up the guts to talk to each other and tell the other about how we felt.

"Really?"

"Yes and you're just as beautiful if not more so today," he tells me.

"Thank you," I blush.

"Bella, how would something like that start? And worse yet why didn't you say something to stop it?" he wonders.

"It just got terribly out of hand," I sigh. I hate the fact that I can still remember how the entire thing started like it was only yesterday, it hurt that people thought so little about me but I had to grow thick skin. There was no way I would have survived high school or Forks if I didn't.

"Junior year one of the guys on the football team tried to crack onto me at a party," I start to tell him. "I was with Mike at the time but Tyler didn't seem to care. Anyway I had a few drinks, which was really stupid of me, and next thing I know I find myself making out with Tyler in a bedroom. He's trying to take things further and I'm saying no when his girlfriend Vanessa barges in."

That girl was a piece of work. I can say without a doubt that I hate Vanessa Carlson with passion. She made my life hell.

"I don't think the captain of the cheerleading squad liked the fact her boyfriend was cheating on her with a junior so Monday morning she started spreading rumours about seeing me fucking two different football players that night at the party. Of course the guys didn't deny it; they just smiled proudly when someone congratulated them or something."

"God Bella, I'm so sorry. That was so cruel," he tells me.

"You didn't do it and besides its history now," I try to assure him. One thing I can say about Edward Cullen is that he never treated me like most of the guys at school did; he never looked at me like I was a slut.

"After that I guess I didn't try to stop the rumours anymore. When some guys would start bragging about me in the locker room I'd just ignore them." I shrug.

"But what about Mike? Weren't the two of you dating through this?" I ask.

"Yeah we were. Mike is this extraordinary guy Edward and he knew that none of it was true. Mike took my virginity our senior year, I guess we both just ignored all the shit people said because we both knew better, and we stopped caring."

"No you didn't," he whispers.

I laugh bitterly. "Ok you're right. No I didn't but it became easier to ignore."

Edward pulls me tighter against him then and I close my eyes enjoy the feel of being held so gently.

"I'm so honoured," Edward finally whispers breaking the silence between us.

I pull back and look at him with confusion in my eyes because I'm not quite sure what he's talking about.

"That you chose me to be your second," he smiles.

I smile back at him and then I remember something. "Not as honoured as I was to be your first," I whisper.

_1 month later_

_Edward POV_

I walk into the kitchen and I find the very reason for my happiness these days sitting at the table eating breakfast together.

"Mornin Daddy" Ethan smiles when he sees me. Bella turns to look at me then and rewards me with a brilliant smile too.

I don't even hesitate as I walk straight towards her and kiss her good morning on the lips, which makes Ethan giggle at us. It's been like this between us for the past month and it's been the happiest month I can remember in a long time. I think Ethan was a little confused by it at first, but now he laughs at us when we're affectionate.

"Morning," Bella smiles at me.

"Hey" I grin.

I turn to my son then and kiss the top of his head before ruffling his hair. "Morning little man"

I take a seat across from Bella and we smile at each other again over the table as I pour some cereal into my bowl, followed by some milk. This morning is one of the first mornings that Bella isn't blushing.

Since we got together and made love we've been spending nights here and there together. At first it was hard because Ethan had started to make his way into Bella's bed of a night, and we didn't really want him walking in on an awkward moment, but we've been working hard at getting Ethan to stay in his own room which is working better for everyone.

Last night was one of the nights we succeeded and I know my grin widens as I remember the night of loving making with Bella.

"So what have you and grandma got planned today?" I ask Ethan.

Another thing Bella and I have done is kept the change in our relationship a secret. I guess it's because regardless of the fact that we share an apartment and a son we haven't actually sat down and had an adult conversation about what's happening between us yet. By some unspoken agreement we've fallen into couple mode but so far we're undefined.

So naturally, neither of us has said anything to our parents either, but I suspect that my mum is suspicious. It's very hard to keep romance a secret when you work with your family. My dad is normally too busy to notice the amount of time Bella and I spend together at work, or the passing touches and smiles, but my mum isn't.

Ethan shrugs. "I don't know," he tells me.

Ethan has settled into his new schedule fairly well too. He goes to the Diner to Renee on Monday through to Wednesday and then my mum takes him on Thursday and Friday, and if we're lucky either Alice or Rosalie take him on the weekend at some time so Bella and I can enjoy some alone time.

Keeping our relationship a secret from my sister and Alice hasn't been that easy and I know for a fact that they're drilling Bella. She's having lunch with them today so last night we decided that she should tell them the truth.

"So lunch is today right?" I ask Bella.

"Yep" she smiles "hopefully I make it back to work alive" she laughs.

"Well if you're not back at your desk by one I'll come looking for you" I assure her.

"Good to know" she smiles back.

I'm sitting in my office looking over a document when Bella knocks on the door. I smile when I look up.

"Hey beautiful"

"Hey yourself" she replies walking in and taking a seat.

"What's up?" I ask. We only talked about a half an hour ago when she brought me a coffee.

"Well I wanted to ask you something," she tells me biting on her lower lip. Bella has no idea how sexy she looks when she does that or how many times a day I wish that I was the one biting down on her lip instead.

"Ok" I smile.

"Well you know about lunch with Alice and Rosalie?" she says and I nod. "And we agreed that I should just tell them about us, right?"

"Sure" I smile.

"What am I telling them exactly?" she finally blurts out.

"Um" wow I never expected her to ask me that "what do you want to tell them?" I ask.

Bella giggles at me then "Edward, I don't want to tell them anything but you know what Alice's like, she'll drag it out of me"

I smile knowingly "Yeah I know and if she doesn't Rosalie will"

"Exactly" she agrees.

"So…"

"So…" she grins.

I laugh then because I don't know what else to do "I'm sorry, Bella" I tell her. "We should have had this conversation a while ago"

"Yeah I guess we should have but it just didn't seem urgent"

"I know" I agree. That's exactly how I feel too; we were just enjoying getting to know each other on a different level and enjoying being together.

"So do you want to talk about it now?" I ask her. I don't want to have this conversation with her here but if Bella wants to I will.

"No, let's get someone to babysit Ethan and we can do it over dinner tomorrow night?" she suggests with a smile.

"I like the way you think," I grin "But what about lunch with the girls?" I wonder.

"Well I'll just tell them the truth, that right now we're undefined" she sums it up perfectly.

_Bella POV_

I've barely placed my bottom in the seat before Alice starts firing questions at me. I don't why I'm so surprised I knew what to expect when I got invited to this girls only lunch.

"Ok chica, spill" Alice demands.

"Spill what?" I feign ignorance "I don't even have a drink yet" I throw in a joke for good measure.

"Nice try but it's not going to fly with us" she tells me "right, Rosalie?"

Oh nice move bringing Rosalie in early, making it clear that I'm out numbered.

"Right" she tells me.

"Look guys do we really have to do this? I mean don't you guys have your own love lives?" I ask.

"Jasper? Love life? Please," Alice scoffs.

"Um no" Rosalie shakes her head.

"Great" I grumble under my breath. "Look, I know you guys are looking for a juicy story but I'm afraid I just don't have one for you. Yes, Edward and I are moving out of friend's zone but at the moment we're undefined"

I decide to just come out with it and hope that we can just get on with lunch.

"Undefined? What the hell does that mean?" Alice cries. I should have known it wasn't going to be that easy.

"We haven't talked about what we are yet," I tell her.

"Well are the two of you, you know?" she asks.

I blush bright red "Alice!" I cry. God Edward's sister is sitting at the table with us.

"Oh god you are," she cries and points, drawing even more unwanted attention towards me.

"Alice" Rosalie scolds and pulls her arm down while I bury my face in my arms. "You are so not my best friend anymore" I mumble.

"Nah you love me chica" she smiles "and for the record I'm really happy for you Bella, I know how long you've been in love with Edward"

"Thank you" I mumble and blush. Trust Alice to bring up the L word in front of Rosalie.

"I knew something was going on" Rosalie tells me ten. "I don't think I've ever seen him as happy as he has been in the past month. Everyone has noticed"

I appreciate what Rosalie has said but then I realise that Rosalie probably never saw Edward with Tanya,

"Thank you" I say.

"Just do me one favour?" she asks me then.

I nod.

"Don't hurt him, Bella?" she pleads with me and I'm moved by the concern in her eyes. Edward and Rosalie have always been close.

"I won't Rosalie," I say. "I don't think I could, I love him," I admit.

It's the first time I've said it out loud, confessed it. I Bella Swan am in love with Edward Cullen, the truth is I think I have been most of my life. It feels good to say it out loud too.

When I look up Rosalie is smiling brightly at me and I sigh in relief. I didn't think Rosalie would ever think I was good enough for her brother and am happy and surprised that she's happy for me.

"So" I turn to the girls then "what's knew with you guys?" I ask.

I have an extra bounce in my step as I walk up the footpath towards the Cullen's front door. I'm really looking forward to going to dinner with Edward tomorrow night so that we can talk and make a mental note to ask Esme if she would keep Ethan for a few extra hours.

I place my hand on the handle for the front door and am just about to push my way into the house when the door is pulled open from the other side. Surprised I jump back.

"Bella!" Esme cries, just as surprised to find me on the other side.

"Hi Esme" I smile, but my smile is short lived when I see someone step out from behind her.

"It was so great seeing you again Esme" she says in a sugary sweet voice. "I've really missed you," she adds before reaching up to hug her.

I feel the keys in my hand shaking and when I look down I realise that my entire body is shaking.

"You too, dear" Esme smiles genuinely at her.

Without a word she pushes out the door purposely giving me a shove for good measure. "Excuse me," she snarls.

I'm speechless. I watch her walk into the driveway and hop into a shiny new car, which looks like a rental and I feel dread take over. What the hell is Tanya Denali doing back in Forks?


	20. Chapter 20

**Part 20**

_Bella POV _

I'm in a daze as I pick up Ethan. Esme doesn't offer any information about Tanya's visit but I can see something in her eyes that I don't like.

Pity.

I put Ethan in the car and I drive back towards our apartment slowly. The whole way up the street I'm scanning the area for the silver rental I saw Tanya driving. I expect her to jump out at any moment.

Once I reach the apartment, I park my car in the garage and the first thing I notice is the absence of Edward's black jeep. I have never wanted to see that car more than I do right this second and for a moment I wonder if he already knows she's in town and is with her, but then I remind myself that Edward is with me now and actually in classes today.

It's almost three hours later when Edward walks through the apartment door. Three hours of pacing and crying. I know that Ethan was confused, the poor kid was happy to go to bed when I took him to get away from me.

"Hi" Edward says quietly as he places his keys down in his usual spot on the kitchen bench.

"Hi" I reply smiling as best as I can. "You're late tonight" I comment.

"Yeah sorry about that" he apologises "I should have called." He doesn't offer an explanation as to why he's late and I want to scream at him and beg him to tell me where he was.

"Did you eat?" I ask instead. "I saved dinner for you, it's in the oven" I inform him before I make a beeline for the kitchen and get ready to prepare it for him.

"Hey" he laughs and grabs my hand as I walk past. "What's gotten into you?" he asks as he pulls me against his chest. As soon as his arms come around me I close my eyes and smile in relief. I doubted that I would ever be in these arms again after I saw Tanya Denali this afternoon.

I don't answer his question I just enjoy the feel of being in his arms.

After a few minutes I step back and smile "You hungry?" I ask him.

"Yeah" she smiles and nods.

_Edward POV _

The minute I step foot through the door I know that something is wrong. Bella is pacing the unusually messy apartment and almost jumped in fright when I entered. I don't push her to talk to me about whatever it is that's worrying her; I know she'll come to me eventually. Bella isn't used to having someone to lean on.

I'm on the verge of sleep when I hear the sound of bare feet coming toward me. I sit up just in time to see Bella enter the room, and lift the sheet for her to crawl in.

"Hey" I smile. This is a nice surprise, also unexpected.

Her small hands immediately frame my face and her lips come down against mine almost urgently. I feel her need and I do my best to give her everything she needs.

I roll us over until she is underneath me, my knee pushing in between her legs.

"Hmm that was nice" I smile down at her when I pull back.

"Uh huh" she replies before leaning up and capturing my mouth again.

I'm engulfed by her passion after that and I soon find myself on my back while Bella's rides me slowly.

"God Bella" I cry.

There is something different about the way we're making love tonight. It almost feels desperate and I once again wonder what happened to upset Bella today. I remember the lunch she had with Rosalie and Alice and wonder if something happened at that.

"Edward, Edward, Edward" she chants.

"You feel so good Bella, so good"

"You too"

We're both oblivious to our cries when our orgasm washes over us; it's so powerful that I don't care that if it wakes our son or not.

"Wow" I mumble when Bella collapses against my chest.

Bella doesn't speak though; her hand just idly strokes my chest and its there, in that exact position that I feel her fall to sleep moments later. It doesn't take me long to follow and it is almost the best night's sleep I've ever had.

I'm up early the next morning; I feel refreshed and decide to go for a run. I carefully climb out from under Bella and I smile when she moans and her hand reaches out to search for me.

I feel my heart thump loudly in my chest. The feelings that wash over me as I stand there don't surprise me. I've felt them for quite a while, but now that I can admit them and give in to them I'm surprised by how strong they really are.

I throw on a pair of sweatpants and a wife beater, tie up my laces, and am soon pounding the pavement.

Forty-five minutes later, still wondering what possessed me to leave Bella's arms I jog slowly back towards our apartment. It takes me a few minutes to realise that there is an unfamiliar car parked in the driveway, or that as I approach the driver's side door is opening and someone is emerging.

It's the sound of her voice that causes me to stop.

"Hi Edward" she smiles.

I come to a stop suddenly; my eyes narrow as I take in the sight of her, wondering if she truly is in fact standing in front of me.

"You look good," she tells me when I don't respond.

I feel my mouth trying to work but right now it's failing me.

"Say something" she says then. "Please?"

"Hi" I finally whisper out.

"You seem surprised to see me," she teases and I wonder what she means by that. Of course I'm surprised to see her. She took off nearly 12 months ago and I haven't heard a word from her since.

"I had hoped you might have come looking for me last night," she admits.

"Why would I do that?" I find myself asking, my voice laced with the confusion I'm feeling.

"I stopped by your parents place yesterday and your mum informed me that you moved I assumed you would have heard" she says surprised.

No, I hadn't heard but I'm suddenly wondering if Tanya is the reason that Bella was acting so strange the night before. Maybe my mother mentioned something to Bella when she picked up Ethan?

"I wanted to come by and see you last night but your mum said you had classes" she continues, "I waited as long as I could before coming by"

I nod. Tanya sighs.

"I didn't realise there was an apartment upstairs"

"It only got used for storage," I inform her.

"Could I come up?" she suggests then.

I stand and stare at her for a few minutes trying to process what she asked, "Why?" I find myself asking. It's a word that serves a thousand purposes, asks a million questions. Why did you leave? Why did you shut me out the way you did? Why are you here now?

Tanya sighs again. "I really want to talk to you Edward, and I really don't want to do it here on the street"

I can see the plea in her eyes and I watch as a small smile appears on the corner of her mouth. I remember that look and how she could wrap me around her finger with it whenever she wanted to. Isn't it how funny how much time changes things?

"We can talk," I tell her. "But not upstairs." I don't know if Tanya knows that I live with Bella and Ethan now but I'm not going to give her that information, I also know it would be a big mistake to bring Tanya into our home.

"Ok" she nods "How about breakfast?"

"Ok" I agree. "I need to grab a shower and change for work so how about I meet you in a half an hour" I suggest.

"Great" she smiles "I'll see you at the Diner"

"NO!" I say immediately. There is no way I am going to be seen with Tanya at the Diner where Bella's parents work and her best friend.

Tanya stops and looks at me strangely "Ok then where?" she asks and I can see the annoyance in her eyes. I have no doubt she suspects the reason I don't want to go to the Diner involves Bella and I'm glad. I think it's best for everyone if Tanya understands from the word go that I won't tolerate her messing with Bella or Ethan.

"There is a café on Walker Street" I tell her. "I'll see you there" I turn then and head towards the apartment without another word. I don't look back to make sure she's left but I know she does when I hear the car drive away.

I collapse onto the stairs shaking as soon as I reach them. You think you prepare yourself for seeing your ex but I don't think anything you do can really prepare you for it. I wonder again what she's doing here? Is she here to just talk? Is she here to tell me that she's now completely over me and to rub it in my face? Or my worst possible fear is she here to get back together?

I pull myself together and head up the stairs. Bella is up when I reach the kitchen, drinking a cup of coffee whilst reading the morning paper, she turns when I enter.

"Hey where did you go?" she asks. Like the night before I notice something in her eyes, it's questioning, not untrusting but worry maybe.

"For a run" I smile at her. She's sitting at the table wearing only one of my long t-shirts and she looks incredibly sexy. I consider standing Tanya up and taking her back to bed but curiosity wins me over.

"I'm going to grab a shower" I tell her as I make my way past her, stopping to kiss her. The kiss is gentle and loving, everything I've come to expect from Bella and when I pull back I realise something very important. I trust Bella, I trust her completely with my heart.

I make the shower quick, and dress for work in my usual attire. I'm not sure what to tell Bella as I make my way into the kitchen but I'm already running late to meet Tanya.

"I have to go," I say.

She looks at me surprised "I have a breakfast meeting" I tell her. It's the closest thing to the truth I can tell her. I know that if tell her that I'm meeting Tanya like I know I should that it will put her on edge, maybe even upset her. It's selfish but I can't deal with it right now.

"Oh ok" she says. I see right away that's she seems a little surprised but she doesn't question me.

"I'll see you at work" she adds then.

"You will" I assure her leaning in and kissing her goodbye. "Give Ethe a kiss for me" I grin then.

"I will" she assures me.

I head down to the jeep then and in five minutes I'm pulling up to the café. I can see Tanya already seated and I take a deep breath to compose myself before getting out of the jeep.

"Here goes everything," I mumble to myself because I have no idea what's about to happen.

_Edward POV_

I'm quiet as I take the seat across from Tanya. The café is practically empty which isn't surprising considering it's still not eight o'clock.

"Hi" she smiles happily, confusing me even more. "I was starting to wonder if you were going to come or not" she tells me. I look at my watch and realise that I'm nearly fifteen minutes late.

"I'm here" I shrug.

Her eyes narrow then "Why are you being like this?" she asks.

"Being like what?" I wonder.

"Like this" she gestures "cold, distant"

I find myself smiling and laughing, "How did you expect me to be? It's been nearly a year," I remind her.

"Believe me I know," she whispers.

I don't say anything in response.

We place our orders then, I don't get any coffee though because I usually have my coffee with Bella when i get to the office.

"So how have you been?" she finally asks me.

I sit straighter. "I've been good," I tell her honestly. I could go into detail and tell her how shit my life was for a few months after she left but I don't see the point. The point is that I'm happy now, happier that I can ever remember being truthfully.

"You?" I ask.

She looks up at me and is about to say something but seems to change her mind "Not so good" she admits.

I'm surprised by her answer. It's truthful but by all accounts Tanya seemed to be doing fine in New York.

"What are you doing here, Tanya?" I finally ask.

"I thought that would be obvious by now" she smiles sadly at me.

Apparently I'm missing something because nothing has been obvious or straightforward by Tanya's visit.

My expression obviously tells her this. The waiter brings our food then but I don't touch it, I wait for Tanya to answer my unspoken question.

"I miss you," she whispers. "God, I miss you." A sob escapes her throat for a second before she quickly composes herself.

I sit there staring. I wasn't prepared for that answer, I never saw it coming.

"It's almost been a year," I point out.

"I know" she nods "and it's been the worst year of my life"

I nod in understanding. I can't agree because even though there have been some terrible moments for me during the past 12 months, most of the things have been wonderful. Ethan and Bella both came into my life and I will always be thankful for that, and for them no matter that it cost me my relationship with Tanya.

I pick up my knife then and begin cutting up the pancakes I ordered. I fill a fork up and place it into my mouth and after my first taste all I can think is that these pancakes aren't as good as Bella's.

Tanya studies me as I clean my plate. "Hungry?" she smirks.

"Must have been the run" I shrug. She seems to have no problem slipping back into our familiar intimacy but I'm not finding it as easy.

The waiter comes over then and removes our plates, one finished, and one almost untouched, before asking if we would like anything else.

"No" I inform him. "Can we get the bill?" I ask.

Tanya looks at me surprised "Anyone would think I was the one who screwed you over" she mumbles.

"What?" I ask shocked.

She sighs "You're acting as though I'm the one who cheated and lied to you" she tells me.

"No" I shake my head "I'm acting as though you are my ex-fiancée who broke up with me, and dumped the four thousand dollar engagement ring I gave you under my door without so much as a word." I snap sarcastically.

Tanya gasps at my bluntness. "You're forgetting the circumstances surrounding why I did that," she cries.

"No. No I am not," I say in a lowered voice since there are now other people around us.

I glance at the clock then and realise I need to get to work. I have a sudden urge for normalcy and to see Bella. I want to have my usual morning coffee with her where we don't talk about all the bullshit from the past. A past I thought I had put behind me.

I stand up and Tanya looks at me confused "Where are you going?" she asks.

"I have a job and I'm supposed to be there in 20 minutes," I tell her.

"But we're talking" she says.

"No" I shake my head "you're sitting here and making excuses for what you did. If you came to apologise you did a shit job" I tell her.

"When did you turn into such an asshole?" she cries.

I laugh bitterly then "it was around the same time you became a heartless bitch" I tell her remembering the way she treated me all those months ago when I was apologising my heart out to her.

"I came here to talk, to apologise," she tells me. "Not to fight" she adds.

"I don't want to fight either but you can't blame everything you did on what I did. Eventually you're going to have to take responsibility for your part in our break-up and how you treated me. I have to go"

"Ok" she sighs.

"Bye Tanya, and for what it's worth it was nice seeing you" I tell her with a small smile. If I had known the trouble that my words would bring when I said them I would take them back in a second. But I can't.

Bella is at her desk when I walk in and I make a beeline straight too her.

"Hi" she smiles at me. "How was your meeting?"

I shrug "boring. I would have preferred to be eating cereal with you and Ethan" I smile at her.

"Good" she grins back at me and my heart thumps at the sight of her.

"Come to my office?" I plead. I have to kiss her so badly right now.

"Ok" she quickly agrees and is soon following me into my office. As soon as I close the door I'm pressing her against it and taking her mouth.

"I missed you this morning," she moans against my mouth.

I sigh against her "Me too" I tell her and I mean it with all my heart.

"We're still going out tonight?" she asks me then.

"Oh course," I agree. "Did you ask mum to keep Ethan?" I ask her then.

"Um no" she admits and I see a guilty look in her eyes "I'll call her later"

"Ok" I reply before kissing her again.

We pull apart after a few minutes reluctantly. "Coffee?" she asks me.

"Yes please" I grin.

"I'll go," she informs before walking to the desk and picking up my cup. I watch as she stops and looks at the new edition to the table, a photo my mum gave me earlier in the week. It's her and Ethan and they're both grinning at the camera.

"This is nice" she smiles.

"I know. It's my new favourite" I tell her.

She heads out then to get our coffee and I sit down staring at the photo in front of me. Bella and Ethan are my life and tonight I intend to make sure Bella understands that.

_Bella POV _

I don't why but I am completely nervous about tonight. I'm still wondering why Tanya hasn't tried to get in contact with Edward yet and at the same time feel relieved. Maybe she wasn't back to get back together with him after all.

"You almost ready?" Edward calls out.

After dropping off some overnight gear and spending some time with Ethan, Edward and I came home to get ready for dinner. I'm getting dolled up since Edward is taking me out

"Yep" I call out.

I put the finishing touches to my make up when I hear the knock on the door and I walk out into the living room wondering who it could be.

Edward pulls the door open and soon all my fears are realised.

"Tanya" he says. "What are you doing here?"

"I thought we could talk" I hear her reply. "Can I come in?"

"I was on my way out actually," Edward informs her. I stand surprised at the conversation. This doesn't sound like a conversation that two people who were once engaged to be married would have after seeing each other for the first time in nearly a year. I feel my stomach drop when I realise that Edward already knew Tanya was back and hadn't said a word.

I turn and walk back into my bedroom and close the door before Edward realises that I was there.

_Edward POV_

I can't believe her timing or her nerve. "Please Edward" she says.

I turn and look towards Bella's door and see that it's still shut so I take a step back and let her in. "Five minutes" I tell her.

"You look nice" she smiles looking at my suit.

"Thank you" I say, "I have a date and I have reservations for eight o'clock" I inform her.

"You're dating?" she says surprised.

"Yes" I inform her. There is no point lying to her or giving her false hope.

"Who? I mean do I know her?" she immediately asks.

I open my mouth to answer her but she quickly stops me "you know what, on second thoughts I don't want to know. It's not important, she's not important," she says.

"Tanya…" I object.

"Please let me finish," she asks and I nod and take a seat.

"I miss you Edward, I miss you so much and I came here to fix things between us," she informs me. "I love you and I know you still love me, please tell me that we can work this out" she pleads.

_Bella POV _

"I miss you Edward, I miss you so much and I came here to fix things between us," she informs me. "I love you and I know you still love me, please tell me that we can work this out" she pleads.

I hear her words and I have to shove my hand into my mouth to stop myself from yelling out. I'm pressed against the door listening and waiting with bated breath for Edward's answer.

_Edward POV_

I stand in what can only be describes as shocked as Tanya pleads for me to give her a second chance.

"We were so good together," she continues when I don't speak. "And I was stupid not to realise how special you were, and how much you meant to me. I know that I can't blame you for the way I left or the way I dealt with it but you really hurt me Edward"

"What's changed?" I find myself asking.

"I have" she admits, "it took me a while to work through the hurt but I have. I'm ready to accept the new part of your life that involves Ethan, and I'm ready to trust you. I know that what happened with you and Bella was a mistake and that you would never do that to me again"

I instantly feel guilty at her words. I know that I shouldn't but it's like being with Bella now proved that Tanya was right all along not to trust me around her.

"I hate my life and who I am without you, Edward," she's openly crying now "It took me way too long to realise that there will never be anyone for me but you. I made us both miserable for so long but I want to make it up to you" she moves closer then and before I know what's happening she wraps her arms around my neck and presses her lips against mine.


	21. Chapter 21

**Part 21**

_Bella POV _

I continue to listen but when the room goes quiet I can't help myself from opening the door and peaking out. I feel my world fall out from under me when I'm greeted by the sight of the man I love locked in an embrace with his ex.

I close the door before the sobs escape and I look around my room lost. I have to think before I completely loose it and when I spot the bag in the corner of my room. I throw in on my bed and start throwing some things into it. I have to get out of here.

_Edward POV _

When I finally come to my senses and realise that I'm kissing Tanya back I quickly place my hands on her shoulders and gently push her away.

"What's wrong?" she asks breathlessly.

My eyes immediately go to Bella's door and I curse when I see it open.

"I can't do this," I tell her quickly.

"Edward…" she doesn't get a chance to finish her sentence before Bella's door opens loudly and she comes storming out of her room.

"Bella…" I call out. She's dressed in a beautiful red slinky dress; her hair is curled and falling over her face. My gaze falls to the bag in her hands then and I feel panic rise.

"Bella?" I call out again and start moving towards her. She's at the door to the apartment and almost through it before I catch her.

"What?" I ask her.

"Don't" she snaps and wrenches her arm free from my grasp. Its then that I finally get a good look at her face and I can tell immediately that's she been crying. I curse Tanya Denali and my stupidity then because I have no doubt now that Bella heard and saw everything that happened.

"Let me explain?" I beg.

"Just leave me alone" she whispers out defeated and before I can blink she's rushed down the stairs and jumped in her car.

"Bella!" I cry out as I rush after her.

"Where are you going?" I ask her now concerned about where she would be rushing off to and why she packed a bag.

Bella doesn't answer me though; instead she pulls out of the garage in a screech and speeds away.

I stand downstairs just waiting and hoping Bella will come back but after fifteen minutes of staring at an empty street I head back upstairs to ring around to find out where she is.

When I enter the apartment Tanya is walking around looking at things. I had hoped she would be gone by the time I got back but that was too good to be true. She turns and looks at me when I close the door.

"Edward what's going on?" she asks me.

"Not now Tanya" I say heading towards the phone.

"Do Bella and Ethan live here?" she demands.

Why is she all of a sudden acting like the jealous girlfriend, and worse yet was she always this annoying? Was I too blind to see the real Tanya when I thought I was in love with her?

"Yes" I answer her.

I pick up the phone and prepare to dial Alice but Tanya's voice interrupts me again "What are you doing? What just happened here?" she asks.

"Will you quit it?" I yell finally losing my temper. I know it's wrong to blame Tanya for what just happened. I let her kiss me, I didn't stop her.

I hear her gasp in shock and I turn my back on her and dial Alice.

_Bella POV_

I have no idea where I'm going when I pull out of the garage I just know that I have to get away from Edward as quickly as possible. The pleas in his voice are almost enough to make me stop but in the end I know I can't. I know I'm not ready for him to tell me what we had was nothing and that he's getting back with Tanya.

I'm driving and sobbing at the same time and it's not until I'm on the highway that I realise where I intend ongoing. I could have gone to Alice but I wasn't prepared to hear I told you so from her, and being that Rosalie is Edward's sister, she wasn't the best person to go to either.

I pick up my cell and dial Esme Cullen. I try to compose my voice to talk to her.

"Hello" she greets.

"Hi Esme its Bella" I tell her.

"Hi sweetie" she replies.

"Listen Esme something has come up and I need to go out of town for a few days. I'm not sure if Edward will be picking up Ethan so do you mind keeping him a little later tomorrow?" I ask.

"Um sure sweetie, is everything alright?" she asks, concern in her voice.

"Yeah something just came up" I say again lamely.

"Ok well look after yourself" she says.

"I will and tell Ethe I said goodnight," I add.

"Ok"

I dial a second number then and he picks up after the fifth ring.

"Mike?"

"Bella?" he asks.

"Yeah" I sob.

"Bella, what's wrong?" he asks.

"Um can I come stay for a couple of days?" I ask.

"Of course" he offers without hesitation. "You binging Ethan?"

I smile despite my mood "No it's just me"

Mike and I don't talk as much as we used to but I make a point of staying in touch with him. He knows that Edward is on the scene now and is being a father to Ethan and has respected that. He's put some distance between us in an effort to deal with it on a personal level and to give Ethan time to adjust, without added confusion. I don't realise till I hear his voice how much I've missed him though.

"Ok when will you be here?" he asks.

"I'm on my way so less than an hour" I tell him.

"I'll see you then" he says.

When I hang up I turn my phone off. I can't deal with all the calls I know will be coming and trust that Ethan is in good hands with Esme.

_Edward POV _

"I'm sorry Edward I haven't heard or seen her," Charlie Swan told me; it's the same thing I got from Alice and Rosalie.

"Thanks Charlie" I say and hang up.

"Where the hell could she be?" I curse.

I dial her cell again and this time instead of a busy signal it goes straight to her voice mail and I realise that I missed my chance; she's already turned her phone off. One thing I know about Bella is that if she doesn't want to be found she won't be.

"Ok,

I've had enough of this Edward" Tanya stands and yells then. "What the hell is going on, why did Bella go barrelling out of here upset and dressed like she was meeting the queen?"

I sigh in annoyance. I had just about all I can take of her but I know I won't be getting rid of her until I tell her the truth.

"Why are you still here?" I ask angrily.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" she demands. "A half an hour ago we were kissing and getting back together now your acting like a crazed man!"

"Crazed? This is calm considering the women I love just ran out on me" I yell.

"What?" she asks shocked.

"You kissed me actually, and we are definitely not getting back together" I finish all of a sudden the wind has gone out of my sail and I sink down on the couch. Realisation hits me then. Bella is gone, most likely thinking that I was getting back with Tanya instead of taking her dinner and telling her how much I loved her, like I planned too.

"Did you just say you loved her?" Tanya whispers out hurt. I look up and I see the tears in her eyes and I feel bad. This was not the way I planned on telling her.

"Yes" I tell her honestly. "I love her and I'm going to do whatever I can to get her back here"

"Why?" she cries.

"Why what?" I ask.

"What is it about her that you can't let go?" she asks me hurt.

"It's simple, I don't want to. She's the most amazing women, mother, and friend that I've ever met. I love everything about her, the truth is Tanya I think I've always loved her"

"What about me, us?" she asks then.

"I did love you Tanya but it was different. We were never passionate about each other we were just comfortable. If you think about it we actually have nothing in common, you were always trying to change me and in some ways I was always trying to be the person you wanted me to be. Bella wants me for who I am and I love her for who she was and is"

"But she's a slut" Tanya cries in outrage "she's slept with half of Forks, Edward"

My eyes narrow angrily "don't you dare ever say that about her again. You know as well as I do that its bullshit and I won't tolerate you talking about her like that Tanya. Bella is the sweetest, most genuine person I know, certainly more than you and for the record people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones," I add cryptically.

"What!"

"Do you think just because I left New York I forgot everyone, Tanya?" I ask then. "I had friends remember, friends that I keep in touch with."

I watch as the colour drains from her face at my confession.

I had never told a soul, not even Bella when the news had reached me. I think it was the eye opener that I needed to help me realise that Tanya Denali was never the woman I thought she was. On her return to New York Tanya lived it up. Drinking and partying every night to the point she had almost flunked out of school, and sleeping with every male that moved, including one of her friends that she had spent a considerable amount of time with when we lived together. I had my doubts after that about how faithful she was to me when we were together.

"W-What?" she stutters.

"I know what you've been doing, I know about school" I tell her. I don't need to add the rest; it's enough for her to understand I know what she's been doing.

"That's the way you like your women isn't it?" she snaps.

"You should leave," I say calmly.

"So that's it?" she stands up and asks me.

"You're choosing her?" she spits.

"A thousand times" I whisper passionately.

I realise that there was never a question or a doubt that I would. Sure my path got altered slightly when Tanya took me by surprise with the kiss but it won't change the outcome.

I love Bella Swan and I never intend on letting her go.

_Bella POV _

"God Bella, what's going on?" is the first thing Mike says to me as I emerge sobbing from my car, and fall into his arms.

I finally can't control them any longer and I lose any shred of control I had held onto on the drive over here. My world is falling apart and instead of fighting to hold it together I've fled and allowed Tanya to walk in and steel my family.

"It hurts Mike it hurts so much" I cry.

Mike leads me into his apartment and pulls me into his arms. "It's ok Bella, everything is going to be ok" he tries to assure me.

It's almost a half an hour later before I've calmed down enough to talk.

"I'm sorry" I apologise. I just barged into his life and broke down on him.

He smiles his typical Mike smile at me, I'm sure it has every girl it comes into contact with swooning but Mike's charms wore away a long time ago for me.

"It's fine. But do you want to tell me what's wrong?" he asks.

"Tanya is back," I answer simply.

Mike knows the story, so my words are enough for him to understand.

"Oh" he says. "It was bound to happen eventually right?" he says.

"I guess"

"But Tanya returning can't be the only thing that's upset you" he points out.

"He was kissing her," I cry then.

"I'll kill him" Mike grinds out. He stands up and paces for a few minutes before turning and looking at me.

"Is he getting back together with her?"

"I don't know" I admit, "I didn't stick around to find out"

"What?" he asks confused.

"I-I heard her tell him she wanted him back, he didn't say no and then the room went quiet and I opened the door they were kissing"

"Bella…" he starts. I'm not stupid and I know exactly what Mike is going to say.

"I know" I close my eyes. "I shouldn't have left like that. I should have given him the chance to explain."

"Yeah you should have" he nods.

He looks at my outfit then "You look nice" he says.

I laugh bitterly. "We were supposed to be going out, he was taking me to Chez Pierre, and we were going to talk about our relationship"

"Oh Bella" he sighs coming and taking a seat beside me. "You need to go back and talk to him"

"I know" I cry, "Not tonight though, I just want to go to sleep, and pretend like this was all a bad dream"

"Ok" he whispers.

When I wake up the next morning I feel like shit. I have a headache and I know when I look in the mirror my eyes will be black from the sleepless night I had. On top of that, I turn on my phone and have almost 20 messages from Edward, Alice, Rosalie, and my parents.

I pick up the phone beside Mike's bed and dial Esme Cullen. I need to hear my son's voice right now.

"Hello"

"Hi Esme" I reply.

"Hey Bella"

"Is Ethan there?" I ask. I don't except for Edward to have picked him up, he was probably too busy re-uniting with Tanya.

"Yeah he is"

"Can I talk to him for a few minutes?" I ask.

"Sure sweetie, just hold on and I'll put him on"

A couple of minutes later I hear my sons angelic voice and I smile for the first time since last night.

"Mama"

"Hi baby" I say. "How are you?" I ask

"I good" he says. "Where are ya mama?"

"Oh not far, I'll see you later ok" I promise him.

"And Dada?" he asks.

I swallow the lump in my throat at his words. Edward has become such a big part of both out of our lives and I don't know how either of us will deal with the changes that I am sure will soon be coming. Especially the fact that Tanya Denali will be in contact with my son, I hate the thought and I wonder if there is something I can do to prevent it.

"Yeah dada too" I say. Edward is a father first and I know despite what is going on he'll make time to see Ethan.

"I'll see you later honey. I love you"

"I luv you to mama" he giggles and then he's gone.

Mike pokes his head in after knocking then "Hey you want some breakfast?" he asks.

"Thanks" I nod.

I help myself to a shower and throw some clothes on just as Mike is serving up breakfast and plomp myself down on at the table.

"How's Ethan?" he asks.

"Good" I reply. "And it reminded me that I can't run away from things. I have a son and I need to go back home to him," I tell him.

He nods "How about I drive you?" he suggests.

"You don't have to do that," I say shaking my head.

"Yes I do," he says. "It's about time I came home to visit Dad and I have nothing on this weekend. I can catch the bus back on Sunday"

"Are you sure?" I ask. The truth is I love the idea of Mike coming with me. I'm not looking forward to the drive home and it would be nice to have his support.

"Yeah. When do you want to get going?"

"As soon as possible" I reply. "I need to go by the house and talk to Edward before picking up Ethan" I sigh.

"How about we pick up Ethan and I take him for a few hours so you and Edward can talk?" He suggests.

"You wouldn't mind?" I ask. I don't know if Esme Cullen knows that something is going on, and truthfully I would rather her not knowing.

"I'd love to, I haven't seen the squirt in a while" he smiles.

Mike heads to get ready and pack a few things, and an hour later we're on the road. The car is silent for most of the way. I'm secretly dreading returning to my home, having no idea what to expect. I think about what I'm going to do when I get there.

Before I know it Mike is pulling into Forks and heading towards the Cullen's. He waits in the car whilst I go in.

"Bella" Carlisle says surprised when he opens the door and finds me.

"Hi Carlisle" I smile, I know he can see how fake it is but he doesn't say anything.

"I'm just here to pick up Ethan," I tell him.

"Oh" he says surprised. "Edward called earlier and asked if we could keep him," he informs me with confusion.

"Oh did he?" I say "I've been out of town and just got back, I can take him now though" I explain.

"Ok then, he just finished a late breakfast," he explains.

The minute Ethan sees me his little face lights up and he comes rushing into my arms. I hold him to me tight wondering if I refuse to ever let him go if maybe he'll just stay my little baby forever.

"You ready to go?" I ask him.

"Uh huh" he agrees.

We gather his stuff together and after saying goodbye and thank you to Esme and Carlisle, Ethan and I head to the car.

We're almost there when his little eyes catch sight of Mike in the car.

"Dada?" he asks hopefully.

"No sweetie" I reply sadly. "But you'll see him later" I promise.

"Hey squirt" Mike grins when I open the back door and place Ethan in his car seat.

"Hiya Mike" he cries in excitement at seeing Mike.

I chuckle as I strap him in. "How would you like to spend some time with Mike today?" I ask Ethan at the same time praying that he'll be okay with it.

His little eyes go wide and he nods with excitement whilst I sigh in relief. I don't know what I would have done if he had said no.

_Edward POV_

Panic is starting to set in when I still have no idea where Bella is the next morning. Is she safe? Is she ever coming back? Of course she is I tell myself. Ethan is here and Bella would never go far without her son.

I haven't got a wink of sleep. After finally getting rid of Tanya I jumped in my jeep and drove around Forks hoping that I would find her somewhere. When I couldn't find her in any of the places I expected to I drove past the motels in Forks hoping to spot her car.

I gave up around midnight and rushed home hoping she would call. I found Jasper on my doorstep when I got there. He didn't ask questions he just came inside and sat with me while I waited, where I'm waiting now.

When I hear the sound of a car down stairs followed by the garage door opening I'm on my feet in a second. I reach the door to our apartment just as Bella reaches the top of the stairs. My hand goes to my chest as I see her, even in sweat pants and one of my shirts she is the still the most beautiful women I've ever seen and when she looks at me I know without a doubt that I'm going to love her for the rest of my life. She raises her eyes to mine then.

"Bella…" I breathe out.


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the characters. They belong to Stephanie Myers and no infringement is intended. **

**Thank you so much for all your support for this story. There is only 1 part to go after this and for those of you who don't like the cliffhangers i hope i didn't keep you waiting too long. **

**Enjoy!**

**Part 22**

_Edward POV _

_I don't believe  
in the smile that you leave  
when you walk away  
and say goodbye_

"Bella…." I breathe out.

"Edward" she whispers in reply.

I step back and let her into the apartment. I notice immediately that she hasn't brought the bag back that she left with last night and I wonder where it is.

My mother called minutes ago to inform me that Bella had been by and picked up Ethan and I wonder where he is now. I was so relieved when my mum informed me she was ok that I didn't even think about where she was taking him, or asking my mum if she knew where she had been.

I watch her look around the apartment, as though she's trying to find something and I wonder what it is. It doesn't occur to me that she expects Tanya to be here.

_Well I don't expect  
the world to move underneath me  
but for God's sake  
could you try?_

"God, I was so worried about you" I sigh in relief.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have taken off like that" she replies.

"Where's Ethan?" I ask then.

She seems to hesitate answering me for a second "With Mike"

"W-What?" why on earth is my son with Mike Newton?

"Mike offered to take him for a little while" she repeats.

"When did Mike get into town?" I ask. Since Bella and I have been living together I haven't once seen Mike Newton. I know that him and Bella talk, but he's been noticeably absent from hers and Ethan's life and I assumed it was because he was a little upset about having his position usurped.

Don't get me wrong I don't have a problem with Mike. In high school I envied the guy, but as far as I know he's a pretty nice guy and by all accounts he was wonderful to Bella when she found out she was pregnant, and played the role as father to Ethan when I couldn't.

I watch as Bella pushes a strand of hair behind her ear "he drove me home this morning" she answers.

_I know that you're true to me  
you're always there  
you say you care  
I know that you want to be mine_

I grit my teeth at her answer, all of a sudden angry as all hell. "You went to Mike?" I ask. Why does this feel like high school all over again? Where Mr Popular, Mike Newton, always gets the girl.

"Yes" she whispers out.

"Right" I scoff and turn my back so she can't see how much the knowledge that she fled to Mike is hurting me.

_Where is your heart?  
'Cause I don't really feel you  
Where is your heart?  
What I really want is to believe you  
Is it so hard_

I just stand looking out the window for a few minutes and when I turn back I find Bella is still staring at me. She's biting down on her bottom lip, hard, and looking at me like she's waiting for something. Is she waiting for me to question her about Mike? Is she waiting to find out about Tanya?

"Ok" she finally nods "I guess I'll just grab some more things for me and Ethan then" she whispers out then.

It's not until she's disappeared from in front of me that I get over my shock and realise what she said. I find her in Ethan's room, pulling some clothes out of his drawers.

_To give me what I need?  
I want your heart to bleed  
That's all I'm asking for  
Oh, where is your heart?_

"What are you doing?" .

I watch her fumble with the clothes, her hands shaking. "Packing" she replies.

"Why?" I ask the panic I felt before returning.

"I can't do this, Edward," she whispers out.

"Do what?" I ask.

_I don't understand  
your love is so cold  
it's always me that's reaching out  
for your hand  
_

"I can't live here and watch you rebuild your life with her" she cries.

Her words hit me like a tonne of bricks.

"Is that what you think is going to happen?" I ask as I walk closer to her. I'm standing right behind her now, but I don't touch her yet.

_And I've always dreamed  
that love would be effortless  
like a petal fallin' to the ground  
a dreamer followin' his dream  
_

I turn her body around so she's facing me and cup her face in my hands. "I love you," I tell her. It's the most simple but profound thing I can say to her.

I watch as she raises her eyes to look at me, filled with shock and surprise.

_Where is your heart?  
'Cause I don't really feel you  
Where is your heart?  
What I really want is to believe you_

_Is it so hard  
to give me what I need?  
I want your heart to bleed  
and that's all I'm asking for  
Oh, where is your heart?_

"What about Tanya?" she asks.

"What about her?" I smile.

"I thought you were getting back together," she tells me pushing out of my embrace.

"You were kissing her" she says then a sob escaping her.

I lower my head in shame for a minute as I prepare to answer Bella. I've been thinking about what to tell her all night. "I'm so sorry you saw that" I tell her. "She took me by surprise Bella, one minute she's talking the next she's kissing me. As soon as I realised what she was doing I pushed her away, I promise"

_It seems so much is left unsaid  
So much is left unsaid  
But you can say anything  
Oh, anytime you need_  
_Baby, it's just you and me  
Oh yeah_

"Really?" she asks hopefully, and it's the hope I hear in her voice that makes me feel relieved. Does that mean that she didn't go to Mike to be with him?

"Yes. As soon as you left I told Tanya that I loved you and that I was going to do everything I could to bring you back to me" I tell her.

Another sobs escapes her.

_I know that you're true to me  
you're always there  
you say you care  
I know that you want to be mine_

Where is your heart?  
'Cause I don't really feel you  
Where is your heart?  
What I really want is to believe you  
Is it so hard  
to give me what I need?  
I want your heart to bleed  
that's all I'm asking for  
Oh yeah

"You chose me?" she asks and she seems to be finding it hard to believe.

"A thousand times over" I whisper out.

"Oh god" she cries. But she doesn't move, I want her in my arms desperately but I'll wait for her to come.

"Please tell me I'm not too late?" I plead then.

"Too late?" she asks confused.

"Mike…"

"God no" she cries. "I just needed someone who wouldn't judge," she tells me. "The minute I got there I knew how stupid I was for running, I should have stayed to fight for you," she admits.

I smile then. "I would have loved to see that"

I watch her laugh a little then. "So she's gone? For good?"

"I guess. I made it clear there was no chance between us"

A smile lights up her face then.

_Where is your heart?  
'Cause I don't really feel you  
Where is your heart?  
What I really want is to believe you  
Is it so hard  
to give me what I need?  
I want your heart to bleed  
and that's all I'm asking for  
Where is your heart?  
_

"Will you please come here now?" I beg, my eyes pleading with her.

Bella is in my arms in a second and I lift her until her mouth it in line with mine before I kiss her. "I love you. I love you. I love you," I whisper as I pepper her face with kisses.

_Where is your heart?_

Her feet slide to the floor when I let her go and her small hands cup my face as she stares in my eyes. "Do you have any idea how long and how much I love you Edward Cullen?" she asks me.

_Where is your heart?_

I can see it all in that very second. I see every ounce of love she feels for me in her eyes and wonder why I haven't seen it before.

"I hope as much as I love you," I breathe out before I close the final distance and seal out mouths together.

_Where is your heart?_

_Kelly Clarkson – Where is your heart? (Album Breakaway)_

_Bella POV_

"I love you," he whispers as he kisses his way down my body. I smile again at his words, my heart lifting, expanding to fit the love I feel in my heart. This morning when I woke up, I never imagined for a second that this was how my day would go. That the man I love, and have loved for so long would tell me he loves me back, that I would be in his arms right now while he took my body to the highest heavens.

"I love you too," I moan out.

Edward settles in between my naked thighs, his fingers opening my wet lips to allow the thrust of his tongue.

"Oh god" I cry out.

He thrusts his tongue in and out of me until he replaces it with a finger and begins swirling his tongue around my clitoris.

"Oh Edward…. ahh EDWARD!" I cry out as my orgasm washes over me.

Seconds later when I open my eyes Edward is gazing over me with a grin on his face and I'm unable to fight the grin that forms on my own lips.

"You're amazing," I tell him.

"No you are," he whispers, his hand framing my face and caressing it gently.

I reach a hand between us then and caress his stomach before allowing my hand to grasp his hard cock.

I stroke it a few times, enjoying the look of delight on Edward's face. "Please Bella" he whispers out.

"Please what?" I tease, remembering that I went through a similar type of torture earlier.

"I need to be inside of you, I want to be inside of you so much" he tells me. "I want to show you how much I love you, my heart"

"Oh Edward" I gasp at his words and the use of the sweet endearment.

I lead him to my opening, and in one smooth thrust he makes us one.

"Yes!" I hiss at the feel of him filling me up.

"Oh god Bella" he moans. "You feel so good, so good" he whispers out.

I wrap my legs around his waist and allow him to sink deep inside of me. He continues to thrust in and out of me, our bodies writhing together.

"I'm so close" he whispers. "You feel so good"

"Me too" I pant.

"OH god Bella…. Ahh" he groans out as he spills his seed deep inside of me. I don't once think about the fact that we didn't use a condom; like we have every other time we've been together. I just want to enjoy the feel of him inside me like this forever.

"Yes Edward, Edward, Edward" I chant as my own orgasm is triggered.

Edward collapses on top of me, panting and I run my hand through his wet hair, soaked from our activities.

"That was amazing," I tell him.

He looks up from his spot against my breasts and smiles "It sure was. I love you so much" he tells me again.

"I will never tire of hearing you say that" I blush.

"I will never tire of saying it," he promises.

I pull him down to me for a kiss, our mouths working furiously together whilst out tongues languidly caress each other.

"What time is Mike dropping Ethan back?" Edward asks then. I chance a look at the clock and realise it's been close to two hours already.

"We didn't decide but I promised Ethan he would get to spend some time with us this afternoon" I tell him.

"You did?" he asks happily.

"Of course" I tell him. "Edward, no matter what happened here today I would never have kept Ethan from you. You are and will always be his father." I tell him.

"Thank you Bella," he whispers. "You saved my life"

"What?" I ask shocked.

"What I had before you and Ethan it wasn't a life Bella. It was an existence, it didn't challenge me, and it wasn't passionate. But this, what we share, our family is all of that"

"Oh Edward" I cry at his beautiful words "I feel exactly the same way. Having you in my life completes it. I love you so much"

"I love you too," he whispers again.


	23. Epilogue

**Well this is it guys. Thank you so much to you all forreading and for your reviews. I he you've enjoyed it**

**Epilogue**

_Edward POV _

The house is empty and quiet when I get home and I call out to Bella and Ethan. Normally this time of the afternoon our four-year-old son is running amuck.

We moved into our own home three months ago and we couldn't be happier. After graduating I started work full time with my mother, and I love it more every day. Bella finally went back to school and is now halfway through her own degree. I'm so proud of her, everything that she has accomplished just speaks of the amazing person that she is.

"Bella?" I call out as I place my briefcase down and flick through the pile of mail on the breakfast nook.

"You're home" I hear her small voice and I turn and smile when I notice her standing in the doorway.

My gaze flicks down to her hand then, where her engagement ring is safely placed.

"Its still there" she smiles knowingly. I've done the same thing every day for the past three months since I put it there. I guess I just like to reassure myself that it's real and that she stills wants me, despite all my faults.

"Good, I want it there forever" I smile back.

I proposed three months ago. It took a lot of willpower to wait that long but I knew I needed to. Even though Bella and I were desperately in love we still needed time to have a normal relationship and build it on solid foundations. I didn't want to rush into things, and I wanted Bella to have do doubts when I asked her to marry me that it was because I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and Ethan, not because I just wanted to be married or was settling.

It might have taken me a while but I think we've finally worked through all of our insecurities. Bella now accepts that I chose her, because I love her, for who she is and will always be and that Tanya Denali is no longer in my heart. I had to work through my own insecurities that I didn't deserve her and forgive myself for the mistakes I made. But most importantly I had to forgive Bella and myself for not being there for Ethan's first few years.

"It will be" she assures me finally closing the distance between us and kissing me hello.

Our families were a little concerned when we decided to buy our first house together when we had no plans for marriage anytime soon. Truth was I had Bella's engagement ring for months, I was just waiting for the perfect time to ask her. Coincidentally it was the night we moved into our house. We were sitting in the living room, no electricity, just candles everywhere as we unpacked and I looked over at her and I couldn't wait a second longer. It was also the night that we christened every room in our house.

"What are you smiling about?" she asks.

"Just remembering the night you agreed to marry me," I tell her.

"That was a great night" she blushes obviously remembering the same thing I was.

"Where's Ethan?" I ask then.

"He's staying the night with my parents" she replied.

"Why?" I wonder.

Bella ducks her head slightly. "I thought we could have some time to ourselves" she replies.

I grin, "I like the sound of that" I tell her.

Ethan now goes to preschool three days a week, which means he only spends one day with the Swans and one with my mother. It was another adjustment period for our family, but this time the people that had the hardest time adjusting were Renee and my mum.

"What did you have in mind?" I ask Bella then, nuzzling her neck. I have a few ideas of my own about how we can spend our time.

"Oh I think we're on the same wave length," she breaths out obviously enjoying my work.

"Hmm good" I smile before swooping her into my arms and carrying her into our bedroom.

"I'm exhausted" I yawn a few hours later and Bella laughs at me.

Our sex life is as amazing as the first night we were together. I'll never get sick of how expressive Bella is when I make love to her. She gives you everything that she has to give and it's absolutely breathtaking.

I rub circles on her naked stomach as I smile down at the angel in my arms; I thank god everyday for bringing her into my life. "Do we really have to wait another three months to get married?" I ask her with a cheesy grin. I honestly can't wait until she's my wife.

Bella looks up and smiles back at me. "Your sister would kill us if we changed the plans now" she tells me.

I nod; I know she's right.

After telling our friends and family the news, Rosalie, my mum, Bella and Renee began organising the wedding. They've put a lot of work into it, which I'm grateful for.

Bella only wanted something small and we both wanted to be married in the spring, which meant that even though I didn't want to wait to marry Bella, we had to.

"But we could move it up a little" she suggests then.

I look down surprised. Bella loved the idea of a May wedding because it wouldn't be too hot but at the same time it wouldn't be too cold.

"We could?" I ask.

"Yeah, what do you think of a late March wedding?" she asks biting down on her lower lip.

"Can we do that? And would you want to?" I ask. In truth it sounds great to me but only if it's what Bella wants. I'd wait a lifetime to marry her.

"I don't see why not, we'd just have to check that the reception venue and church are available," she tells me. "And I think it might be a good idea, especially if I want to fit into the beautiful and expensive dress I already bought" she adds with a chuckle.

It takes me a few minutes to process what she says, "What do you mean?" I ask stupidly.

I'm still rubbing circles on her stomach when Bella's hand covers mine and presses it flat against her abdomen. It's then that I notice the slight bump that I've never noticed before.

"Bella?" I ask with wide eyes.

"I know we didn't plan this," she breathes out. "But we didn't plan Ethan either and I think that's turned out pretty well" she tells me.

I'm speechless. There are no words to express what I'm feeling.

"You're pregnant?" I finally ask.

Bella smiles shyly "Yeah about three months apparently" she says.

"Three months?" I ask with wide eyes. That would coincide perfectly with the night I proposed.

"The odds were stacked against us," she laughs. She's right, we made love over and over again, and in every room of our house without using protection once, but neither one of us had cared. I think without words we both knew what we wanted. I had seen the signs for a while that Bella wanted another baby, and I longed to be there whilst Bella was pregnant and my child. I wanted to do all the things I didn't get to do when Ethan was born.

It's just that neither of us had verbalised it.

"Wow" I say.

"Is that all you've got to say Edward Cullen?" she asks. I look down and she's smiling but I can also see the vulnerability if her eyes. She's worried that I might not be happy about this.

"I'm speechless, it's just fucking fantastic," I cry then.

Bella giggles. "We're going to have a baby, Edward"

I turn serious eyes to her then "Yeah we are" I smile. "I can't wait"

"Me either" she says. "I know it will be hard for a little while. I'll have to give up working at the firm, but I can pick up some hours on weekends and at night in the Diner" she says.

"Baby dont be silly, we don't need the money" I assure her. I get paid a fairly good wage at the firm and I'm sure if I needed a pay rise i could get it.

"But what about school?" I ask worried. Bella has put off her dreams for so long and I don't want her to do it any longer.

To my surprise she smiles "Edward, I like school but I love the idea of our baby" she tells me.

"Me too" I agree.

It might not be the perfect plan, two children before 25 but I wouldn't change it for the world.

"I'll keep going for as long as I can and then I'll do what I can by correspondence when the baby is born" she assures me.

"When did you find out?" I ask then.

"This morning" she replies happily. "I don't know why it took me so long to work it out" she blushes then.

"I'm booked in for the first scan tomorrow" she tells me then. "Can you come?"

My face lights up "Of course I can" I assure her. Like I said I plan on being there every step of the way.

We lay in silence then, both lost in our own thoughts about the future.

What I do know is that I've never been happier in my life than I am today with Bella and my family. I know that whatever happens we can work through it together because I know without doubt, or question that my heart will always be with Bella Swan.

**The End**


End file.
